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Need some advices

mikeworld

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I have dated a few times in my life,and i loved them,but if they talked about getting marriage prepare , I just want to stop the relationship.I feel I actually can only stay alone by myself......recently I started another relationship with a girl online.I feel I just need a person to email with,I do not care about her life,her future,anything.I feel I do not know how to love.I m not a bad man,but I feel something wrong inside me.

I have been a christian for a few years,read my bible, keep supporting some ministry and poor people by money and preaching or other help, most people will all say I m a nice person ,too. but u see I feel something wrong...
 

Robinsegg

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Have you considered that you simply need friends and are called to a life of celibacy and non-marriage? The Apostle Paul spoke of marriage as a distraction from ministry. Could you be one called to avoid this distraction? If you feel this is possible, you may consider no longer pursuing any dating relationships with women and making it clear that you want friendship with them only.

Also, have you cultivated male friendships? Do you have guys you can talk to and confide in? Every man (married or not) needs such friendships.

Our culture really emphasizes that anyone who is not in a romantic relationship is somehow deficient. Remember that this is a lie from Satan, and that you may not be called to such.

Rachel
 
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ephraimanesti

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I have dated a few times in my life,and i loved them,but if they talked about getting marriage prepare , I just want to stop the relationship.I feel I actually can only stay alone by myself......recently I started another relationship with a girl online.I feel I just need a person to email with,I do not care about her life,her future,anything.

MY BROTHER,

What i hear you saying above is that you are just using people without caring for them or being interested in their welfare, happiness, needs, or their becoming attached to you to the point that they will be hurt when they get too close and you blow them off. This is not the way Christians relate to those around them!

I feel I do not know how to love.I m not a bad man, but I feel something wrong inside me.

You are correct when you state that there is "something wrong inside me." An inability to love and care about others--an inability, incidentially, from which i suffered for most of my life--indicates a lack of a TRUE connection with God Who IS LOVE. Without that connection, TRUE Love is impossible. The connection--for me and, hopefully for you--comes through the Holy Spirit taking up residence in your heart and taking over control of your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and actions. For me, this came as a result of my #1. Identifying this lack in me as evidenced by my lack of love for others--you appear to have done this. #2. A COMPLETE AND TOTAL SURRENDER to God consisting of the death of the old and the acceptance of the new Life in Him--you do not appear to have reached this stage yet and need to do so before anything will change for you. Perhaps you have a Pastor, Elder, Priest, Deacon, or other spiritual mentor who can help you in this regard.

I have been a christian for a few years,read my bible, keep supporting some ministry and poor people by money and preaching or other help, most people will all say I m a nice person ,too. but u see I feel something wrong...

"IF I SPEAK IN THE TONGUES OF MEN AND OF ANGELS, BUT HAVE NOT LOVE, I AM ONLY A RESOUNDING GONG OR A CLANGING CYMBAL.
IF I HAVE THE GIFT OF PROPHECY AND CAN FATHOM ALL MYSTERIES AND ALL KNOWLEDGE, AND IF I HAVE A FAITH THAT CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS, BUT HAVE NOT LOVE, I AM NOTHING.
IF I GIVE ALL I POSSESS TO THE POOR AND SURRENDER MY BODY TO THE FLAMES, BUT HAVE NOT LOVE, I GAIN NOTHING.

"LOVE IS PATIENT, LOVE IS KIND. IT DOES NOT ENVY, IT DOES NOT BOAST, IT IS NOT PROUD.
IT IS NOT RUDE, IT IS NOT SELF-SEEKING, IT IS NOT EASILY ANGERED, IT KEEPS NO RECORD OF WRONGS.
LOVE DOES NOT DELIGHT IN EVIL BUT REJOICES WITH THE TRUTH.
IT ALWAYS PROTECTS, ALWAYS TRUSTS, ALWAYS HOPES, ALWAYS PERSEVERES.

"LOVE NEVER FAILS.
BUT WHERE THERE ARE PROPHECIES, THEY WILL CEASE; WHERE THERE ARE TONGUES, THEY WILL BE STILLED; WHERE THERE IS KNOWLEDGE, IT WILL PASS AWAY.
FOR WE KNOW IN PART AND WE PROPHESY IN PART, BUT WHEN PERFECTION COMES, THE IMPERFECT DISAPPEARS.
WHEN I WAS A CHILD, I TALKED LIKE A CHILD, I THOUGHT LIKE A CHILD, I REASONED LIKE A CHILD.
WHEN I BECAME A MAN, I PUT CHILDISH WAYS BEHIND ME.
NOW WE SEEE BUT A POOR REFLECTION AS IN A MIRROR; THEN WE SHALL SEE FACE TO FACE.
NOW I KNOW IN PART; THEN I SHALL KNOW FULLY, EVEN AS I AM FULLY KNOWN.

"AND NOW THESE THREE REMAIN: FAITH, HOPE AND LOVE.
BUT THE GREATEST OF THESE IS LOVE."


I Corinthians 13

ephraim
 
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Elijah2

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I have dated a few times in my life,and i loved them,but if they talked about getting marriage prepare , I just want to stop the relationship.I feel I actually can only stay alone by myself.
What sort of a childhood did you have?

How loving where your parents to you and to each other?
.....recently I started another relationship with a girl online.I feel I just need a person to email with,I do not care about her life,her future,anything.I feel I do not know how to love.I m not a bad man,but I feel something wrong inside me.
Yep, there is something wrong inside of you, you have no LOVE!

I have been a christian for a few years,read my bible, keep supporting some ministry and poor people by money and preaching or other help, most people will all say I m a nice person ,too. but u see I feel something wrong...
We can be a nice person, but being a nice person, doesn't make you a Christian.

Read my article on being Born-again.

There sure is something wrong with you, and you need Freedom in Christ.
 
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Elijah2

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I was from a military family. My dad was strict , and i felt having a lonely childhood. but now I have a lot friends, and like to be around people. I used to party a lot when I was younger.
Well, I can understand that mate, because I was in the Army for a long time, and when I came home from Vietnam, I was changed, and sadly my son and daughter suffered as well.

Things are okay now between my son and daughter, and we have a great relationship, but yes being a servicemen's child can have a lot of restrictions and pressure on you. Loneliness was one thing that caused problems.

So you said earlier about feeling something wrong, so would you like to share it? You can PM me if you like.

Always remember that "love never fails".

Take care.
 
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spr

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Your normal. If your not looking to get married keep relationships on a friends level, that way there can't be any guilt for leading someone on. If it ever comes up you can just say I'm confused, and don't want to make any hasty decisions, nothing wrong with that. Not all of us were meant to be married.

Mat 19:12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

Some were born to be single, and some make themselves single for the kingdom of heaven's sake. Something to think on.
 
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