need advice

[ebd]

Hi:

I would like to hear of other people's thoughts about this situation. I'm actually not sure if I'm in the right forum, but I it sounded like the closest one to the condition that my friend has.

Anyways, about ten years ago, a friend became mentally ill. I'm not sure if she was diagnosed with schizophrenia, but she did exhibit delusions and paranoia. One of the meds that she is on, sound like the ones discussed elsewhere in this forum. She has a history of going off of her meds and being hospitalized. Once, when she was off of her meds, she threatened to harm someone. I visited her once in the hospital, and my gift had to be screened to make sure that she wouldn't find anything sharp to hurt herself or others.

I've been getting pressure from my family to drop her as a friend because they are worried that she may harm me or others in my immediate family. I must admit that when I heard that she had threatened someone before while she was off her meds, that I got kind of scared. I think that if I knew that she would consistently stay on her medications, that I'd feel more comfortable, but she seems to get into these cycles of stopping them and getting hospitalized. I'm torn about what to do, because of the pressure from my family, and also about not being there for my friend.

 

[devotee]

Hi ~ this is a "crunch" time for you isn't it? What really is the best thing to do....the Lord says we do not have to make that ultimate decsion...

i have a friend who is diagnosed schizophrencic, my family worry about my freindship with her. They feel uncomfortable, blame her past drug use, sometimes people need to simplify a situation in order to deal with it.

another firiend, now somehere in the world, is diagnosed bi-polar, she did becaome quite scary at one stage, we had to call the mental health team to come to the house, it took her a long time to forgive me...

there are times when your friend is in this world - you can be near to them; there are times when their foot in the other world draws them - it is a time to distance oneself, and to ensure that they are in a safe environment.

is it necessary that your kids and spouse be friends with this person and be in contact with them? if not, then what are the chances of harm coming to them?

let your friend know the freindship is difficult when she is off her meds; that you can't "hear " her, and that you feel she cant "hear" you, and hey~that gets gets scary sometimes. As you get to know her cyles you will notice what trigggers initiate the downward spiral, perhaps she isn't aware of these herself either.

understand that she goes off them becasue she feels like crap and very un-her when she is on them, and that to stay on them she must interact with healthcare staff that are emotionally and physically overburdened, and some just want that 80,ooo pay check...

freindship is by definition not a burden. and please don't take this the wrong way...but friendship is not about fair weather...our society has no "place" for difference, we talk about individuality and then punish non-conformity. In a first nation culture, your freind would likely be training with a witchdoctor/healer/medicine ...they are walkers between worlds and seen as close to God..the training is about controling their illusions, and getting to know their cycles - our culture has its values so back the front.

your friend has agency, she just doens't live in a society that promotes her self-worth and ability to control, she is likely constantly told she is a "sufferer" with an innate "problem", which implies things are out of her control.

your continuing freindship will help her practice control. She will always have a foot in each world, and that is not a bad thing. Many prophets of the old testament would be labeled schizophrenci today - burning bush? build an ark! skeletons rising form the desert? revelations! Theri spritirual training guided them when things got confusing...they trusted in what their "visions" told them.

i hope you find a way to continue to communicate with your freind. She may have given up learning this world's language - who takes the time to learn hers, well you have been! Be firm, be repetitive, be very open, and follow through on your boundaries.

she is likely creative - perhaps you could explore this together in an environment you are both comfortable in; my friend and i are writing her dreams and visions out - maybe we will make a book and she can choose her own psychiatrist andhave one less trigger hijacking her to only the other world.

you are a good friend to be reflecting on your actions, seeking the opinions of others, and searching with the Lord as to what is the "right" thing to do. i wish you both all the best in your journey together - or when it parts - as it sometimes does, because it is time...

pm anytime,

 

[Jeshu]

Hi:

I would like to hear of other people's thoughts about this situation. I'm actually not sure if I'm in the right forum, but I it sounded like the closest one to the condition that my friend has.

Anyways, about ten years ago, a friend became mentally ill. I'm not sure if she was diagnosed with schizophrenia, but she did exhibit delusions and paranoia. One of the meds that she is on, sound like the ones discussed elsewhere in this forum. She has a history of going off of her meds and being hospitalized. Once, when she was off of her meds, she threatened to harm someone. I visited her once in the hospital, and my gift had to be screened to make sure that she wouldn't find anything sharp to hurt herself or others.

I've been getting pressure from my family to drop her as a friend because they are worried that she may harm me or others in my immediate family. I must admit that when I heard that she had threatened someone before while she was off her meds, that I got kind of scared. I think that if I knew that she would consistently stay on her medications, that I'd feel more comfortable, but she seems to get into these cycles of stopping them and getting hospitalized. I'm torn about what to do, because of the pressure from my family, and also about not being there for my friend.

Hi.
Difficult situation. However I know that I can become violent in my psychotic stages and that if I would lose my friends because of that it would hurt even more than it does all ready. Mentally ill people are usually not violent but can be at times and during these times the mentally ill person is in need of medical help. Try being a good friend and stick by this person, remembering that if she becomes violent she needs medical help.


God bless you with this

Gerry

 

[ebd]

Thanks, Jeshu, for your reply. I appreciated your thoughts on the matter.

I'd like to ask another question to the forum: What is the best thing to say to someone who really needs to take her medications but is continually trying to get off them?

From my conversations in the past that I've had with my friend, she has told me of how difficult it is to tolerate the side effects. Besides the physical side effects, she is also bothered by how the meds have deadened her feelings, yet she sounds depressed to me in spite of this deadening.

She said that she would try to reduce the dosage in increments on her own...I don't know what to say to her in this situation besides suggesting to her to talk to her doctor about the matter.

 

[tapero]

[rule2.2]

Please note: One can not discourage people to take medicines. Thanks.

 

[ebd]

I apologize for breaking a rule on the forum.

 

[ebd]

is it necessary that your kids and spouse be friends with this person and be in contact with them? if not, then what are the chances of harm coming to them?

let your friend know the freindship is difficult when she is off her meds;


I'm thinking about limiting her contact with my children, but I think that I will offend her if I mention that our friendship will be difficult when she if off her meds.

 

[goodmac2006]

Hmm. I getting that that "threat" she made was meant to protect you. Whatever you don't don't drop someone that has your best interests at heart.