I am a housecleaner and a volunteer evangelist. I have been a Christian for 6 years. I am from Okinawa, Japan, but I have been living in the U.S. since I got married, which was in 1973. My 3 of 4 children became Christians after I became one. I always believed in God but not in Christ because I have watched so many church goers that behaved like they were no different from the non-believers. My husband and his family were all church goers. They were the first bad examples I had witnessed. So I lost interest completely in Christianity.
Meanwhile, I was in an unhappy marriage, and was at the end of my rope and I tried to survive by asking for help. I went to counselors, friends, and my husbands pastors. They couldnt help us because my husband refused to change. He wanted me to change. I wont go into details because its such a long, messy story. Anyway, I was desperate and asked God to make me a Christian because so far He was not helping me out.
That was 6 years ago. Since then I devoted myself to be a Christian by attending church, joining the Bible classes, giving tithe, etc. I was frustrated for awhile because I didnt feel much of a difference. And that was mainly because just about everyone gave me different advice because I was new. Then I stopped listening to everybody elses advice and devoted myself to study the New Testament. Then I found a secret of His power. I found a secret for powerful inner peace and confidence in following His teaching. He taught me to be kind to everyone around me, to be giving as much as I can, not just 10%, to do my best in every which way, to give up all of my desires and live for Him, and that He loves everyone and wants them to go to heaven, so I should try my best to reach out to everyone. He taught me how to deal with my husband, too. He didnt tell me to wait until I have relationships with people to evangelize. All I have to do is tell how wonderful His teaching is and how we need Him to go to heaven because we are so imperfect. I started to have complete peace and confidence in my walk with Him.
But I still had so many problems with the churches because they solicited their way of Christianity to me because I was a new believer. I guess they meant well but all they did was frustrate me. I was happy with my walk with Jesus. Why do so many Christians try to push their way of Christianity? I am not saying my way is better than anybody elses. The more I learned of His teaching the more I started to see the sinful way of most who were around me, including many church goers. Its not so hard to see. My first confrontation was my husbands porn hobby and my neighbors inhabitation with her boyfriend without getting married and so on. I will not go into the sins I witnessed because its just too many.
At the beginning I talked to their pastors but they just didnt want to deal with the sin of their members. I believe most American church goers know what I am talking about. All of this made me doubt about attending an organized church. I never felt peace about any of the churches I attended and their walk with Jesus. I didnt see much fruit of Christianity. I believe its because their lack of obedience. I believe wholeheartedly you cant have true confidence and peace without wholehearted commitment to Him and doing the best that we can. God will help us to be better if we give everything weve got without withholding anything.
I stopped attending organized churches because I didnt see the evidence of leaders doing their best to lead their people to be obedient. I wanted Gods time and money to be used wisely. I didnt want to waste. I want my time on earth to serve God, since its so short considering how late in my life I started. I didnt want to waste my time and money on people who are not interested in being obedient to Him. I found out there are so many people who can use my time and money wisely. Its Voice of the Martyrs (V.O.M.) and my family. They are my church. (So please stop lecturing me about attending a church building.) I have peace with God on my decision.
In conclusion, I will keep speaking up for Jesus teaching and for the importance of being obedient to Him. Without wholehearted commitment and doing the best we can, we cant be fruitful for God and evangelize effectively. Most church-goers I know dont show interest in others. I think I am very friendly and make myself easy to approach so its not that I am difficult to talk to. Wherever I go I am the one always to make the first approach. I am not a shy person. I do my best to be kind to others because I want to succeed in evangelizing.
Go and make disciples of all nations, and teach them to obey everything I have commanded you.
In His name,
Hitomi Wilde
Meanwhile, I was in an unhappy marriage, and was at the end of my rope and I tried to survive by asking for help. I went to counselors, friends, and my husbands pastors. They couldnt help us because my husband refused to change. He wanted me to change. I wont go into details because its such a long, messy story. Anyway, I was desperate and asked God to make me a Christian because so far He was not helping me out.
That was 6 years ago. Since then I devoted myself to be a Christian by attending church, joining the Bible classes, giving tithe, etc. I was frustrated for awhile because I didnt feel much of a difference. And that was mainly because just about everyone gave me different advice because I was new. Then I stopped listening to everybody elses advice and devoted myself to study the New Testament. Then I found a secret of His power. I found a secret for powerful inner peace and confidence in following His teaching. He taught me to be kind to everyone around me, to be giving as much as I can, not just 10%, to do my best in every which way, to give up all of my desires and live for Him, and that He loves everyone and wants them to go to heaven, so I should try my best to reach out to everyone. He taught me how to deal with my husband, too. He didnt tell me to wait until I have relationships with people to evangelize. All I have to do is tell how wonderful His teaching is and how we need Him to go to heaven because we are so imperfect. I started to have complete peace and confidence in my walk with Him.
But I still had so many problems with the churches because they solicited their way of Christianity to me because I was a new believer. I guess they meant well but all they did was frustrate me. I was happy with my walk with Jesus. Why do so many Christians try to push their way of Christianity? I am not saying my way is better than anybody elses. The more I learned of His teaching the more I started to see the sinful way of most who were around me, including many church goers. Its not so hard to see. My first confrontation was my husbands porn hobby and my neighbors inhabitation with her boyfriend without getting married and so on. I will not go into the sins I witnessed because its just too many.
At the beginning I talked to their pastors but they just didnt want to deal with the sin of their members. I believe most American church goers know what I am talking about. All of this made me doubt about attending an organized church. I never felt peace about any of the churches I attended and their walk with Jesus. I didnt see much fruit of Christianity. I believe its because their lack of obedience. I believe wholeheartedly you cant have true confidence and peace without wholehearted commitment to Him and doing the best that we can. God will help us to be better if we give everything weve got without withholding anything.
I stopped attending organized churches because I didnt see the evidence of leaders doing their best to lead their people to be obedient. I wanted Gods time and money to be used wisely. I didnt want to waste. I want my time on earth to serve God, since its so short considering how late in my life I started. I didnt want to waste my time and money on people who are not interested in being obedient to Him. I found out there are so many people who can use my time and money wisely. Its Voice of the Martyrs (V.O.M.) and my family. They are my church. (So please stop lecturing me about attending a church building.) I have peace with God on my decision.
In conclusion, I will keep speaking up for Jesus teaching and for the importance of being obedient to Him. Without wholehearted commitment and doing the best we can, we cant be fruitful for God and evangelize effectively. Most church-goers I know dont show interest in others. I think I am very friendly and make myself easy to approach so its not that I am difficult to talk to. Wherever I go I am the one always to make the first approach. I am not a shy person. I do my best to be kind to others because I want to succeed in evangelizing.
Go and make disciples of all nations, and teach them to obey everything I have commanded you.
In His name,
Hitomi Wilde
