My struggle

[Loukuss]

So the quick lowdown...

My girlfriend and I of almost 2 years are currently involved in a long distance relationship. She is planning on moving out here soon enough, but when she moves here another problem, an old problem will be quite present in our relationship again: premarital sex.
We have talked lots about stopping and I have tried pushing for it, but we have both caved in to the temptation. We want to get married eventually and we want to be pure for our wedding in front of God....but this is very difficult. I just know that we will fall back into the same trap once again because we arent strong enough...I wish we were.

Please pray for us.

 

[tapero]

Praying for you friend. I think what you both are seeking is wonderful; same occurred with me some 15 years back or more, and we did what you are trying and wanting to do.

It really messed me up spiritually when we failed, as well as hubby (prior to marriage), however affected me much more deeply as not only did i hurt, but in having sex with him, i believed I was hurting him spiritually in his walk with God.

so, that is what happened with me.

praying brother.

blessings,
tapero

 

[Johnnz]

From your post I am not sure whether you are having sex, or are into 'heavy petting'. Stopping either is really hard, especially when you love someone and want to be close.

Those who have made it never found it easy. They had to put real restrictions and boundaries in place and then follow them through. When you are together after time away the pressure is to spend as much time together as possible, and that adds to sexual pressure.


John
NZ

 

[Barnabas71]

I will pray for you on this. It is somewhat hard to offer adivce on as it is a difficult subject matter to talk about. Whenever I give advice or encouragement I always try as much as possible to draw extrapolations and conclusions from my own past life experiences and mistakes -- oh I've made plenty of them, so I hopefully do not sound preachy or condescending in any way. Plus, passing on this experance in gentlness of spirit to a fellow brother or sister in Christ is a helpful thing to do -- God likes us to build each other up, we are very much under constant seage from both the world in genaral and the devil in particular -- as we are of course God's people. It is good, as tepero said that you are seeking after purity in your marrage.

Would there be any possibility of bringing forward the proposed date for your marrage? Could it be feasible to meet away from each other's place of residency? I know it sound's impractical but I know that once you are together inside a building all alone you will find it immensely difficult to resist if you get that urge. Again I am treading very carefully on this difficult topic as my own personal experances are not quite the same. As I said at the begining I am praying for you both on this. If you can manage to hold of till you are married I think you will be so richly blessed over the longer run.
God Bless you,
Banabas

 

[wmlbrn]

My wife and i lived together before we got married and we ended up having affairs after 3 years of marraige. Don't make sex the key to your relationship. Make god the Key.