I am new to this forum. I just registerd yesterday . I am 44 yrs old and and I have been having blasphemous thoughts since I was 18 yrs old. For years I have doubted my salvation, and that God really loved me.At first the thoughts were about the Holy spirit. But inspite of the thoughts I stilled pursed God. when I first had the first thought I totally freaked out, but was afraid to talk to anybody for fear they would just confirm my worst fear that I'd committed the unpardonable sin. Then I did seek out help. Some tried to cast the Devil out of me, others just didn't know how to help me.Through out the years I've had answers to prayer , I've lead people to the Lord, I've prayed for people to be healed of sicknesses and some haved healed. In spite of this my mind would tell me it was coincidence.But I sill didn't know why I was having these thoughts.Four yrs ago I was sitting in church and out of no where I had a blasphemous thought about Jesus. I became so sacred and full of fear. I would lay in bed totally tormented by the thoughts and fear.Untill one day out of the blue my wife felt prompted to google ocd blasphemous thoughts. low and behold I started to read about other people having blasphemous thoughts. untill that point I thought I was the only one in the world that was struggling with this.During this this time I also found a spirit filled therapist. Its was He that talked to me about ocd and all that relates to it.I started taking medication. But thats all I did to treat it. Last yr in Nov. I decided to go off the Meds but in jan of this yr I had a real bad spike.I began to have blasphemous thoughts about many things pertaining to my faith in Christ.So I went back on the meds 3 wks ago.I think they started to kick in because I'm not obbessing as much. I also came across this book called OVERCOMING OBSESSIVE THOUGHTS how to gain controls of your ocd. by chrisitine Purdon I just started reading it has focus excercises. I've read it has helped other people. It introduces cognitve behavioral therapy. so far it has been helpful.Discovering that other people are going through the same thing helps me believe that God our father understands. I tell myself that no one can come to the Lord unless he is drawn so just the fact that we desire to rid our self of these thoughts and that they bother us is a Good indication of God in our life. I could forgive someone knowing how ocd produce these intrusive thoughts surely we can't be more merciful than God. God knows all things and most of us recieved christ before these thoughts and he sill drew us to himself.there is more I can say be I'll end it here In christ forfever.
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my story
- Thread starter renewedmind
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renewedmind,
welcome! Love your user name.......it is one of my favorite scriptures!
Romans 12:2!!!
you will find here a fellowship of loving brothers and sisters who do understand!
Q
welcome! Love your user name.......it is one of my favorite scriptures!
Romans 12:2!!!
you will find here a fellowship of loving brothers and sisters who do understand!
Q
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thanks QUannie I'm not to savy when it comes down to navigating around this forum. renewedmind
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Same here and actually that is true because we cant come to God by ourselves.If come to God, He has obviously drawn us.
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