My life basically used to be all about myself. The other person who I cared about satisfying ultimately was myself, I only cared about whatever concerned me and I only did good things for others to look good.
In junior high school, I went through what I consider to be the very lowest point of my life. I was teased a lot at school and was never happy with myself. At that point my grades started slipping and I found myself even considering suicide a few times. I was basically unhappy because I felt like nobody liked me and this lead me to say somethings that I didn't mean. I felt lonely.
I moved on to high school where I decided that I needed to get people to like me. I decided at this time that I would not like to commit suicide. My life in high school at this point became focused on myself because I felt that I needed to achieve great things in order to earn the love of other people. During high school, I got far better grades and was involved in all sorts of activities. I tried my hardest at everything and had some good achievements, but I never felt like I had gained what I felt like I needed: the admiration of other people. High school was a better time for me, but I was never completely happy with myself. Many times I felt empty and that even though I was a great musician, a bright student, and a track star that the people who said they were my friends secretly hated me.
I moved on to college where I decided that what I needed to be happy was a girlfriend. At this time, finding a girlfriend became the sole focus of my life. I found myself getting nowhere and felt like a loser often times because I had never had a girlfriend before in my life. The emptiness that I had been feeling inside me at this time seemed to grow and I found myself getting less and less happy each day.
I did find a girl that I wanted to date, but unfortunately she was never interested in having that sort of relationship with me. by this time, things were getting really messed up for me: I felt that a lot of the people that I had made friends with recently secretly hated me and I felt lonely and in need of a relationship.
One Friday night, I decided that I would ask this girl out one and last time, and of course she said no. That night was just unbearable for me. I cried a lot that night and felt like things were hopeless and I would never gain the love and admiration of other people that I felt like I deserved.
The Monday after this incident, I was walking across campus when I saw a few of my friends who were going to our chapel on campus to pray. I decided to join them, and ended up experiencing something that was new, but at the same time exciting to me. This experience led me to look to prayer for help and comfort more in my life. I started signing up for time slots in a 24/7 prayer room that we had going on on campus, and during these times found myself discovering who Jesus really is. I then accepted Jesus as my savior after a few days of visiting the prayer room.
At this time, I found myself craving to learn more about God, praying every day, and enjoying doing things for God. I would pray for his will to be done in my life, and this led me to stop worrying about find a girlfriend. I accepted that God would bless me with a wife when the time comes. I felt that the emptiness that I had been feeling had been fulfilled and for the first time for a long time I was actually happy. I later realized that I had awesome and real friends who loved really loved Jesus and each other. I got involved more with the Christian group on campus. At this point, I felt like a new person and was happy with what I had become. Still til this day, I pray every day and try to get as much of God in my life as is possible, for I can't do it without him.
In junior high school, I went through what I consider to be the very lowest point of my life. I was teased a lot at school and was never happy with myself. At that point my grades started slipping and I found myself even considering suicide a few times. I was basically unhappy because I felt like nobody liked me and this lead me to say somethings that I didn't mean. I felt lonely.
I moved on to high school where I decided that I needed to get people to like me. I decided at this time that I would not like to commit suicide. My life in high school at this point became focused on myself because I felt that I needed to achieve great things in order to earn the love of other people. During high school, I got far better grades and was involved in all sorts of activities. I tried my hardest at everything and had some good achievements, but I never felt like I had gained what I felt like I needed: the admiration of other people. High school was a better time for me, but I was never completely happy with myself. Many times I felt empty and that even though I was a great musician, a bright student, and a track star that the people who said they were my friends secretly hated me.
I moved on to college where I decided that what I needed to be happy was a girlfriend. At this time, finding a girlfriend became the sole focus of my life. I found myself getting nowhere and felt like a loser often times because I had never had a girlfriend before in my life. The emptiness that I had been feeling inside me at this time seemed to grow and I found myself getting less and less happy each day.
I did find a girl that I wanted to date, but unfortunately she was never interested in having that sort of relationship with me. by this time, things were getting really messed up for me: I felt that a lot of the people that I had made friends with recently secretly hated me and I felt lonely and in need of a relationship.
One Friday night, I decided that I would ask this girl out one and last time, and of course she said no. That night was just unbearable for me. I cried a lot that night and felt like things were hopeless and I would never gain the love and admiration of other people that I felt like I deserved.
The Monday after this incident, I was walking across campus when I saw a few of my friends who were going to our chapel on campus to pray. I decided to join them, and ended up experiencing something that was new, but at the same time exciting to me. This experience led me to look to prayer for help and comfort more in my life. I started signing up for time slots in a 24/7 prayer room that we had going on on campus, and during these times found myself discovering who Jesus really is. I then accepted Jesus as my savior after a few days of visiting the prayer room.
At this time, I found myself craving to learn more about God, praying every day, and enjoying doing things for God. I would pray for his will to be done in my life, and this led me to stop worrying about find a girlfriend. I accepted that God would bless me with a wife when the time comes. I felt that the emptiness that I had been feeling had been fulfilled and for the first time for a long time I was actually happy. I later realized that I had awesome and real friends who loved really loved Jesus and each other. I got involved more with the Christian group on campus. At this point, I felt like a new person and was happy with what I had become. Still til this day, I pray every day and try to get as much of God in my life as is possible, for I can't do it without him.
He is preparing you and her for each other, and to grow in His love for you. Put Jesus first in everything you do, and then relax in His perfect wisdom. He knows exactly what you want and need in a mate and He will bring her to you. You don't have to search for her. She will come to you. I'm glad for you that you have accepted Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. He will never fail you. God bless you!!! 
Love in Him,Joyfulsoul
