• The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.

    If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.

    If you have spiritual issues related to a mental health and recovery issue, please use the Recovery Related Spiritual Advice forum. This forum is designed to be like Christian Advice, only for recovery type of issues. Recovery being like a family in many ways, allows us to support one another together. May you be blessed today and each day.

    Kristen.NewCreation and FreeinChrist

  • Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

  • CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.

My ongoing struggle

Gothlady

Active Member
Jul 11, 2006
265
13
USA
✟22,969.00
Faith
United Ch. of Christ
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Democrat
So basically this is my story, I started beliveng because I was curious about God about 2 years ago (I think I was 14) I was always messing with people of faith, calling htem morons, ect. My Dad always hated people or faith too. I have not told him yet, as he might get angry. I have to wait untill he sleeps to get online and I have to hide in my room or the woods if I want to pray.
 

Onlythingavailable

Senior Veteran
Apr 19, 2006
5,983
326
✟330,552.00
Faith
Christian
That's a tough situation. Don't let your father's attitude discourage you. Do you have any christian relatives? How does your father treat them?

When we go through struggles like this, it's important to remember that we don't need to carry God, He carries us. Let Him comfort you, let Him carry your burdens. I suppose what I'm saying is that your faith needn't be a burden, but instead a source of hope, love and encouragement.

Praying for you.
 
Upvote 0

madison1101

Senior Veteran
Sep 17, 2004
4,354
288
67
Pennsylvania
✟5,939.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Democrat
Keep yourself in prayer. You can pray in your bedroom, can't you? Get yourself a Bible and really dig in and see how other people dealt with persecution. Study the life of Joseph when he was sold into slavery by his brothers. Read the Psalms and see how David cried out to God when Saul was chasing him trying to kill him. Read the Epistles of Paul and see how he preached while in prison.

God can do mighty things, including change your father's heart. He changed yours, didn't He?

Praying for you at this time.

Hugs,
Trish
 
Upvote 0

heron

Legend
Mar 24, 2005
19,443
962
✟48,756.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
In Relationship
Gothlady said:
I have not told him yet, as he might get angry. I have to wait untill he sleeps to get online and I have to hide in my room or the woods if I want to pray.
That has a bit of intrigue and mystique to it. I can see how frustrating that could be. Last year a CF member from an Asian country had a similar dilemma. But most of his family reacted the same way -- not in mockery, but scorn and alienation.

It's precious to have something wonderful that a parent didn't make you do. And to have a connection with God that's all your own... a comfort.

It takes a while for someone to stop scoffing, and they sometimes feel hurt when you stop joining them in your old bond... so taking it gradually seems wise. You won't change his mind just by telling him.

Let little bits slip out... defend the brunt of jokes... slowly let him know you want to go to meetings and services. Be who you need to be in Christ -- caring for your dad and his change of heart will be slow. Pray that the Holy Spirit does the work of change in him... it doesn't have to be your battle. David was very patient with Saul, and waded through the rejection respectfully.
 
Upvote 0

Akathist

Theology Team
Site Supporter
Jun 28, 2004
17,436
746
USA
✟92,948.00
Faith
Eastern Orthodox
Marital Status
Private
Politics
US-Others
There is a person in the Ancient Way (where us Orthodox flock) that had a similar situation as that Asian person mentioned above. She had to hide her faith out of fear of physical attack until eventually she ran away from her family. She was from a Middle Eastern Family and lived in a Middle East Country.

I would encourage you to remember that this is what the early church was like for many people. There is even mention of it, but I can't remember the book or verse but it says something about children having to turn against parents etc.

I would encourage you to not disrepect your father and try to convert him with his current way of thinking. Instead, pray quietly, even under the blankets of your bed at night.

Make friends with some Christians so you can say you are going to visit them when going to bible class or something.

Remember that you will not always be young, you will eventually be able to move out of the house on your own or to college. It will be easier then.
 
Upvote 0

austrianfoster

Active Member
May 25, 2006
86
2
Livonia, NY
Visit site
✟22,716.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Green
the first thing you need is a christian support network, to both help you in your growing faith, and be there to listen and help (if possible) when/if things get rough between you and your father. most christians would welcome the opporotunity to help and encourage someone new to the faith. to do that will, unfourtunatly, increase the chances of you comming into conflict with your father. if you associate yourself with known christians, your father will start asking questions. while i would discourage you from trying to convert your father, making your decision hidden from him isn't good either. if you try to keep up your anti-christian facade, you'll just wind up pushing away other christians, which i think will just make this all the more difficult for you.

austrianfoster
 
Upvote 0

Gothlady

Active Member
Jul 11, 2006
265
13
USA
✟22,969.00
Faith
United Ch. of Christ
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Democrat
madison1101 said:
Study the life of Joseph when he was sold into slavery by his brothers. Read the Psalms and see how David cried out to God when Saul was chasing him trying to kill him. Read the Epistles of Paul and see how he preached while in prison.
Hugs,
Trish

thanks for the prayers. Got any verse #'s?
 
Upvote 0

Shane Roach

Well-Known Member
Mar 13, 2002
14,552
1,328
57
✟23,036.00
Faith
Christian
When I first read this thread I couldn't really think of anything to add. I for some reason thought about it last night though, and then this morning, well... I forgot. But now I remember and I wanted to say, some day... you are going to have to face your father with this. It is inevitable. If it is getting in the way of your ability to even so much as pray, then it is pretty bad. Christians have held to Christ even in the face of pain, torment and death.

It's a heck of a thing for me to say to you since I have never faced a situation like yours, I know, but at the same time, I have, and I think most Christians have, at some point been put in a situation where they had to choose between Christ and conflict. I have a situation on my blog you could read if you like. It is not quite as bad as your situation, but if I add that part of the way I was paying for college was through a room I got in exchange for cleaning and otherwise working at the Wesley Foundation, you can see that the situation had a certain amount of stress for me.

At a very early age you are being asked to HOLD ON, and I know you can. I know you can.

I can find a verse or two from David I think to perhaps show you some hope, since you asked for verses, even though I didn't actually post about them before. I will try anyhow...

Ps 18:1
Psalms 18
18:1 To the chief Musician, A Psalm of David, the servant of the Lord, who spake unto the Lord the words of this song in the day that the Lord delivered him from the hand of all his enemies , and from the hand of Saul: And he said,
Ps 18:1-3
I will love thee, O LORD, my strength.
2 The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.
3 I will call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies .
KJV

...

Ps 18:5-7
5 The sorrows of hell compassed me about: the snares of death prevented me.
6 In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried unto my God: he heard my voice out of his temple, and my cry came before him, even into his ears.
7 Then the earth shook and trembled; the foundations also of the hills moved and were shaken, because he was wroth.
KJV

God is not happy with those who oppress you because of Jesus...

You might want to read that whole Psalm if you have a Bible. There are online Bibles too... uh... darn there used to be one linked to from Christian Forums...

Anyhow, google the Bible, it will show. :)

Maybe pray for your father. Definitely find yourself some adult Christians for support to defend you from emotional abuse if that is how he treats you. This is not a fight I would think you should try to fight alone.

You may however be blessed some day to find that your faithfulness converts your father as well. But first you have to make sure your own faith doesn't waver, okay?
 
Upvote 0

FatherJay

Active Member
Mar 10, 2006
115
11
Visit site
✟306.00
Faith
Other Religion
Marital Status
Private
Hello Gothlady,

Best advice so far is to meditate/pray for your father. While your father may never be a theist (god-believer) himself, that doesn't mean that he can't allow you to believe as you will.

One thing you might consider is actually talking with your dad about your beliefs. Atheism is not the evil many portray it to be, and perhaps your dad is simply being defensive when he "trash talks" theists. Tell him that you accept him and his beliefs, and you would like the same respect. Prove it to him by NOT pushing your beliefs onto him (don't insist on praying at dinner time, don't invite him to a bible study, etc) and he may just surprise you.

Blessings,

Father J
 
Upvote 0

jamie4418

Regular Member
Aug 4, 2006
401
11
✟23,107.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Hi Gothlady. I urge you to go to a site called Precious Testimonies (just google those two words and click the first site you see). Right now, I can't post a site because I don't have enough posts.

There are so many testimonies on there of people who became christians. It is an amazing site. My faith has really been strengthened by reading the stories. These are people who hated god, were satan worshippers, and had miraculous conversions.

Personally, I have not had any such amazing conversion experience, but I know that I am His.

Please PM me if you like.
 
Upvote 0

heron

Legend
Mar 24, 2005
19,443
962
✟48,756.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
In Relationship
Feel free to move around in the Bible, since the early chapters have a different slant to them... it's more of an account of how things happened, where the NT contains more teachings on spiritual concepts.

Psalms were songs written in praise, in panic, in gratefulness... but seem to be an expression of things we go through, and they often read like prayers.... Proverbs (just past the middle) is common-sense advice.

Anyway, don't feel guilty if you don't read it in order.
 
Upvote 0

If Not For Grace

Legend-but then so's Keith Richards
Feb 4, 2005
28,116
2,268
Curtis Loew's House w/Kid Rock & Hank III
Visit site
✟61,998.00
Gender
Female
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Republican
I will remember you in my prayers. Is your Mom active in your life? The other posters are spot on, there is nothing to be gained from direct opposition to your Dad. He slowly will notice the change in you. Perhaps he will just call it maturity and will not recognize it for the revelations you have had. That's ok, not everyone has ears to hear with. We are instructed to go into our closet to pray. I have a friend who lives in an alcoholic home who says she likes to pray in the shower--its the only quiet time she really gets...Keep the faith--it's worth it.
 
Upvote 0