My father...

[Anony_mouse]

I know that fathers are human and not perfect. Nevertheless, while I know my father is a good husband and is the breadwinner of the family, I find that he's always so tense and formal with me, my mom, and my older brother. He gets angry easily and says some pretty hurtful things from time to time. He doesn't physically hurt us or anything, he's just... Tense and distant.

While I know he means well, I feel like he suffocates me and doesn't let me have room to do my own thing or... Manage my own life (in a sense).

Don't get me wrong, I love my father... I just wish he wouldn't be so mean all the time. For a large majority of my life, I felt unloved by him.

I guess I'm just wondering how do I deal with him so I don't feel so hurt. My boyfriend suggests that I should just let him go/leave him be because there isn't anything I can do to make him not unhappy. I live with my family and while I find escape from my home at school, it's summer now and I don't know how to deal with him. When I was younger, I just got really defensive and introverted, imploding so I wouldn't explode. That wasn't healthy so now that I'm in college, I'm able to get away from home for longer periods of time.

We are a Christian family and I know that the Bible says: "honor your parents" And I totally get that. It's just that I want to be able to do so with a glad heart instead of a heavy burdened one.

Anything will help. Thanks!

 

[who93]

I'm sorry that you are experiencing this. The best thing I can think of is for you to pray for your dad and keep showing him that you love him in whatever way you feel most comfortable.

Even though our earthly parents are not perfect, our Father in heaven is perfect. Turn to Him when you are feeling down. He will always welcome you with open arms and show you His unfailing love. God bless!

 

[Godzila]

I'm the ONLY christian in the family...

I even left home when i was 18 because that was the choice given to me....

"leave if you're gonna be like this (be a christian)" my mother said.

So I left....of course they didn't think i would take what they said seriously...and soon they found out i actually left.

Its been years since then...i'm 22 now and they have much more respect for me, because now they realize "words" matter.

As much as I "suffocate" in my house hold, I need to keep pushing because the day will come when its too late. I will end up with the burden of knowing I failed to open my families eye to see the truth....and they all end up away from God for eternity.

 

[TanteBelle]

I know that fathers are human and not perfect. Nevertheless, while I know my father is a good husband and is the breadwinner of the family, I find that he's always so tense and formal with me, my mom, and my older brother. He gets angry easily and says some pretty hurtful things from time to time. He doesn't physically hurt us or anything, he's just... Tense and distant.

While I know he means well, I feel like he suffocates me and doesn't let me have room to do my own thing or... Manage my own life (in a sense).

Don't get me wrong, I love my father... I just wish he wouldn't be so mean all the time. For a large majority of my life, I felt unloved by him.

I guess I'm just wondering how do I deal with him so I don't feel so hurt. My boyfriend suggests that I should just let him go/leave him be because there isn't anything I can do to make him not unhappy. I live with my family and while I find escape from my home at school, it's summer now and I don't know how to deal with him. When I was younger, I just got really defensive and introverted, imploding so I wouldn't explode. That wasn't healthy so now that I'm in college, I'm able to get away from home for longer periods of time.

We are a Christian family and I know that the Bible says: "honor your parents" And I totally get that. It's just that I want to be able to do so with a glad heart instead of a heavy burdened one.

Anything will help. Thanks!

PM me please, because I know what you are feeling! But there are some things that need to be sorted out. This is a huge issue!

 

[ShaunS]

Hi . I can connect with what you are going through . I have a father that is the same way . And at the age of 31, I can see so much of his hostility in myself . I am single and someday would like to foster or adopt a little boy . I love my father. But, I hope I can be a better parent in the way of not having so much tension and anger that my father has . It seems when u are raised around negative people for most of your life, it can wear off on a person. Trust the Lord. Talk too him. He offers free advice and a shoulder to lean on .

 

[mrphan]

Well i had the same problem and God liberated me of that...my dad once called me a waste of sperm :/ but hey I know my heavenly father see's great value in me ..God will strengthen you my friend

p.s. I do piano lessons online for christians . If you are interested, check out pianohereandnow dot com