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Flibbertigibbet
Guest
After having had no contact from my husband since May 10, he came by my home this afternoon. He was drinking, of course. He told me that he has decided to "go away" (no further details to that) and that I deserve to know the truth - he has cheated on me twice during our marriage. Last year, and then again during this present separation. Apparently these were one-night stands - he said it was women he did not know before. Who knows? Who cares?
He didn't offer any details. He did keep making statements to the effect of he knows how hard this must be to hear, and how my heart must hurt. Odd statements since I was not upset, nor surprised. He also made a comment that this would probably make me question my faith in God, even though I would say it will not. I had kept to my rule of not trying to converse with a drunk man until this comment. I did feel compelled to tell him that I certainly don't doubt my Lord, but I had already known that my faith in my husband was misplaced.
He seemed to want kudos for "being honest" about this. I told him I appreciated him telling me, but I was already pretty certain that he had not been faithful - all he did was confirm it.
Not only that, he also was fishing around for me to try to make him feel better about himself. It is a common ploy he uses, putting himself down and talking about what a horrible person he is to such an extent that people feel compelled to tell him that no - he's a good man who does bad things, blah blah. I did not cooperate in the bail-out today. He said he was a piece of crap and I deserve better, and I agreed with him.
I really am not upset. This last go-round of fake repentance did me in, I believe. The marriage was already dead - what difference does it make to find out after the fact that there is more to the story? Dead is dead.
Oh well, long sort-of vent.
Anyway - I will now be filing for complete divorce.
He didn't offer any details. He did keep making statements to the effect of he knows how hard this must be to hear, and how my heart must hurt. Odd statements since I was not upset, nor surprised. He also made a comment that this would probably make me question my faith in God, even though I would say it will not. I had kept to my rule of not trying to converse with a drunk man until this comment. I did feel compelled to tell him that I certainly don't doubt my Lord, but I had already known that my faith in my husband was misplaced.
He seemed to want kudos for "being honest" about this. I told him I appreciated him telling me, but I was already pretty certain that he had not been faithful - all he did was confirm it.
Not only that, he also was fishing around for me to try to make him feel better about himself. It is a common ploy he uses, putting himself down and talking about what a horrible person he is to such an extent that people feel compelled to tell him that no - he's a good man who does bad things, blah blah. I did not cooperate in the bail-out today. He said he was a piece of crap and I deserve better, and I agreed with him.
I really am not upset. This last go-round of fake repentance did me in, I believe. The marriage was already dead - what difference does it make to find out after the fact that there is more to the story? Dead is dead.
Oh well, long sort-of vent.
Anyway - I will now be filing for complete divorce.
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