<Dogan> Just try and imagine michael jackson as a football player
<Samurai> ....
<Samurai> All that i'm going to say to that is:
<Samurai> the touchdown dances would be insane
<JonnyCash> man i was having this bad dream about driving drunk but then i woke up from it
<JonnyCash> well i had to because the light turned green
gentoogod: today i met the stupidest 3 people
gentoogod: thier 3 brains combined couldnt solve the dilemma they faced today
siral21: what was it
gentoogod: ok before i say this
gentoogod: 100% true, not one second of a lie
gentoogod: this lady went into mcdonalds today and ordered a big mac for her
gentoogod: and ordered 2 mcgrittles one for each kid. one had bacon one without
gentoogod: her sons are around 18 or 19 so not infants
gentoogod: she went to the counter furious cause the son that wanted bacon has no bacon on his and the one that didnt want bacon has bacon on his
gentoogod: i fell on the floor beside her and couldnt stop laughing
gentoogod: so i finally stood up and asked her to repeat, thinking maybe shes drunk
gentoogod: she looked at me straight faced and repeated it. and her 2 sons were beside her mad that they didnt get the order they wanted
<^head^> A nine year old boy asks his mother, "Is God male or female?"
<^head^> After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, "Well God is both male and female."
<^head^> This confuses the boy, so he asks, "Is God black or white?"
<^head^> "Well," she says, "God is both black and white."
<^head^> This really confuses the boy, so he asks, "Is God gay or straight?"
<^head^> Feeling a bit out of her depth, but wanting to be consistent, the mother answers, "Honey, God is both gay and straight."
<^head^> At this the boy's face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks...
<^head^> "Is Michael Jackson God?"
<SJEZealot> You know your car is slow when it has a blue circle with the letters F-O-R-D in it.
<Zoomzoom123> At least they circled the problem.
Trikkz R 4 Kidz: YO
Trikkz R 4 Kidz: WASSUP?
tetsu2051: presumably not your shift key
<GC> do you have any idea how hard it is killing flies on your screen when its a touchscreen!? you have to wait till they walk off a button
<Mfling> rofl
<mx> heh
<GC> i swear they have started to get wise and just sit around on the close buttons of all my apps!
<skycreatoR> today at my job (i work in a cinema) we had the premiere on shrek 2
<skycreatoR> and because of the ocation, green popcorn
<skycreatoR> then some little girl came over to my booth and asked why the popcorns were green
<skycreatoR> i said it was because we put mashed shrek down in the popcorn machine
<skycreatoR> then she began crying and ran away
<random_monkey> "UPS" - that's the noise they make when they drop your parcels
<Keolah> whats up?
<Zarggg> A direction away from the center of gravity of a celestial object.
<+Sam2> Pregnancy tests: Blue line means your pregnant, yellow socks mean you missed.
<pyromaniac> reality tv is a very sketchy "reality"... one guy picxking from 25 hott chicks... oh yea THATS reality
<legola5> | ×| Winamp is: Playing |×| INCOMPLETE (my)Queen - We Are The Champions3dc88b69146fd4de16c0be9fa2ddabb2002c287d00800000ac44000000b4 | ×| 1Min 59Sec
<legola5> bet thats a pain to sing
<harm_> today this one lady got angry cause we dont carry i quote wireless power supplies
<ogregasm> a what
<harm_> thats what i said
<harm_> maybe you want an adaptor for a wireless router o rsomething??
<harm_> shes goes no no i read online about this i wannit i wannit
<harm_> then she got mad when i told her that kind of technology doesnt exist
<ogregasm> heh
<harm_> i tried to be nice but it got to the point where i was like"get back to us in 30 years"
<harm_> "once we attain the secret of positron deflector shields, wireless power supplies shall become a reality"
<ogregasm> why bother being that much of a jerk to the poor woman
<harm_> well shes the one who got all up in my face asking for the store manager
<harm_> i told her he had just teleported to a corporate meeting in tokyo
<Samurai> ....
<Samurai> All that i'm going to say to that is:
<Samurai> the touchdown dances would be insane
<JonnyCash> man i was having this bad dream about driving drunk but then i woke up from it
<JonnyCash> well i had to because the light turned green
gentoogod: today i met the stupidest 3 people
gentoogod: thier 3 brains combined couldnt solve the dilemma they faced today
siral21: what was it
gentoogod: ok before i say this
gentoogod: 100% true, not one second of a lie
gentoogod: this lady went into mcdonalds today and ordered a big mac for her
gentoogod: and ordered 2 mcgrittles one for each kid. one had bacon one without
gentoogod: her sons are around 18 or 19 so not infants
gentoogod: she went to the counter furious cause the son that wanted bacon has no bacon on his and the one that didnt want bacon has bacon on his
gentoogod: i fell on the floor beside her and couldnt stop laughing
gentoogod: so i finally stood up and asked her to repeat, thinking maybe shes drunk
gentoogod: she looked at me straight faced and repeated it. and her 2 sons were beside her mad that they didnt get the order they wanted
<^head^> A nine year old boy asks his mother, "Is God male or female?"
<^head^> After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, "Well God is both male and female."
<^head^> This confuses the boy, so he asks, "Is God black or white?"
<^head^> "Well," she says, "God is both black and white."
<^head^> This really confuses the boy, so he asks, "Is God gay or straight?"
<^head^> Feeling a bit out of her depth, but wanting to be consistent, the mother answers, "Honey, God is both gay and straight."
<^head^> At this the boy's face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks...
<^head^> "Is Michael Jackson God?"
<SJEZealot> You know your car is slow when it has a blue circle with the letters F-O-R-D in it.
<Zoomzoom123> At least they circled the problem.
Trikkz R 4 Kidz: YO
Trikkz R 4 Kidz: WASSUP?
tetsu2051: presumably not your shift key
<GC> do you have any idea how hard it is killing flies on your screen when its a touchscreen!? you have to wait till they walk off a button
<Mfling> rofl
<mx> heh
<GC> i swear they have started to get wise and just sit around on the close buttons of all my apps!
<skycreatoR> today at my job (i work in a cinema) we had the premiere on shrek 2
<skycreatoR> and because of the ocation, green popcorn
<skycreatoR> then some little girl came over to my booth and asked why the popcorns were green
<skycreatoR> i said it was because we put mashed shrek down in the popcorn machine
<skycreatoR> then she began crying and ran away
<random_monkey> "UPS" - that's the noise they make when they drop your parcels
<Keolah> whats up?
<Zarggg> A direction away from the center of gravity of a celestial object.
<+Sam2> Pregnancy tests: Blue line means your pregnant, yellow socks mean you missed.
<pyromaniac> reality tv is a very sketchy "reality"... one guy picxking from 25 hott chicks... oh yea THATS reality
<legola5> | ×| Winamp is: Playing |×| INCOMPLETE (my)Queen - We Are The Champions3dc88b69146fd4de16c0be9fa2ddabb2002c287d00800000ac44000000b4 | ×| 1Min 59Sec
<legola5> bet thats a pain to sing
<harm_> today this one lady got angry cause we dont carry i quote wireless power supplies
<ogregasm> a what
<harm_> thats what i said
<harm_> maybe you want an adaptor for a wireless router o rsomething??
<harm_> shes goes no no i read online about this i wannit i wannit
<harm_> then she got mad when i told her that kind of technology doesnt exist
<ogregasm> heh
<harm_> i tried to be nice but it got to the point where i was like"get back to us in 30 years"
<harm_> "once we attain the secret of positron deflector shields, wireless power supplies shall become a reality"
<ogregasm> why bother being that much of a jerk to the poor woman
<harm_> well shes the one who got all up in my face asking for the store manager
<harm_> i told her he had just teleported to a corporate meeting in tokyo
