Space said:
You blasphemied the Holy Spirit on a piece of paper, but flushed it down the toilet, because you didn't want anyone to see it.
You're scared to do something God might want you to do.
Could you repent at this point?
Also, I heard repenting is like a childlike faith (like you're going to jump off the edge and have faith that your dad will catch you). Can someone explain more about this?
Thanks!
Space, the way to find genuine faith is explained in the Bible and that is the only way true faith is obtained. Therefore, consider these Bible teachings:
"Those who know your name will place their trust in you for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you" Psalm 9:10 Knowing His name is not merely knowing how to spell or pronounce it. It is learning about Him until you know Him--"...let him who boasts boast in thiis, that he knows and understands me, that I am the LORD who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth, for in these things I delight, declares the LORD" Jer. 9:24
The more a person learns about God the more he/she will understand that God is worthy of them placing their trust in Him, as expressed in Ps. 9:10 above. As an example of that, notice that right after Adam and Eve sinned, and lost their knowledge of Him, they ran from God, hid and tried to cover themselve, but after God found them, He provided a covering for them better than they had provided for themselves. That should have told them the God was their benefactor. Therefore, what you want is a faith that is based on the way God really is. Notice in the last part of Jer. 9:24 that the LORD gives particular importance to His steadfast love, His justice, and His righteousness. These are things about Him that are particularly important to consider in coming to know and understand Him.
The Bible also says, ...He has given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness "through the knowledge of Him." (2 Pet. 1:3) and you know the verse where Jesus said, ...take my yoke upon you and "learn of me" and you will find rest for your soul.
The gospel of John is a good place to begin studying Him. As you read, remember that God in heaven is exactly like Jesus was on earth. Notice the way Jesus was--His compassion, mercy, patience and good works, especially to those most in need. He is the same today as He was back then, and God the Father is just like He is. Before closing, I will leave you with this thought:
do you realize that none of us are good enough for God, that none of us are worthy of Him, nor will ever be worthy of Him? YET He has made a way for us through Christ so we can return in peace to Him by dressing those who place their hope in Him up in Chris's own righteousness?? How about that? Looking for coat tails into heaven? Rather than just coat tails, why not the whole garment of Christ's own righteousness? That righteousness will be sufficient for anyone to rely on. It has already been tried by death, hell, and the grave and overcame them and it will be sufficient for all who rely on His righteouness. Rather than rely on the filthy rags of their own (so-called) goodness, everone should cast them away just as the apostle Paul cast away the thought of relying upon himself so that He could be found in Christ's righteousness. (Phil. 3:7-10)