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lonewolf98

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I was molested by my uncle when I was 10. I didn't tell anyone until years after it happened. But I didn't feel any better.

I'm not sure if I was also molested when I was around 3 or 4 but ever since I was a child, I've had a foggy flashback that I was molested by another girl. If it's a false memory, why would I have created something like that? I don't think I'll ever know if it's repressed or false.

I've always been shy and sometimes I think I might be bi-curious. I don't know if it's because of that. I think I might have social anxiety.

Can anyone else relate?
 
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EazyMack

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Hi there. I just wanted to extend my sympathy. I cannot relate directly, but have known people who were abused in the same way. I have seen the long-lasting effects it has. What happened to you should never have happened, it was wrong for those people to do it, God will deal with them, and God has made a way to free you from any shame you might feel from it (because you have nothing to be ashamed of... these are evil acts committed against you). It is absolutely one of the very worst things a person can do to another human being, and I am very sorry you had to go through that. :(

I know that things like this can make it extremely difficult to trust people and discern between what is healthy and what is unhealthy for you. These are the natural, unfortunate results of such abuse. Not everyone is bad, not everyone is capable of doing such terrible things. But, obviously, some people are. And it will always be a battle for you to decide who is trustworthy. There will be times when you don't trust some people enough, and there will be times where you trust the wrong people too much.

Good for you for having the courage to speak up about this! That takes a lot, and you should be proud of yourself for having done it. My guess would be that you were not the only victims to these people. I only hope that the people you told will hold these perpetrators accountable for what they did.

Have you received any support from your family since bringing the news out? Can you seek out professional, Christian counseling? Everybody in the world needs counseling, too few people seek it out. I strongly recommend talking with a Christian professional, as they will understand how these things affect the mind & cloud the judgment, and they will be able to help you work through the process of coping with the results of this in a healthy way.

Praying for you.

P.S.: You are not alone.
 
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EazyMack

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These are the ways the enemy works to discourage us & make us doubt our value.

Your mother may keep silent about it because she doesn't know what to do... so she doesn't do anything. This is not right on her part. But do not let that make you doubt whether you should have told someone! He is an abuser and he needs to be brought out to the light so that he can be prevented from abusing anyone else.

Satan & his demons are real. They operate undercover. They don't want credit for their dirty work, they just want to destroy people. In fact, the best way for them to achieve this is by going unnoticed in what they do. They have gotten to your uncle, and to your mother, and are trying to get to you. Don't let them deceive you: you have a voice, you deserve to be heard, and your abusers deserve to be held accountable for what they did. In Jesus, you have power over the enemy. Hold on to Him, pray, and keep your heart's focus on your relationship with Him.

I am guessing by your username that you are 15? You are at a tough age already, without having to deal with all this. I'm sorry again for what you're dealing with.

Do not think of yourself as a lone wolf. So many others have gone through what you've gone through. And so many of us, even if we haven't gone through it, hate what happened, and stand with you in support. I understand you must feel alone and powerless. That is a lie of the enemy. You are not!

I would tell anyone in your family who will listen. I would tell people of authority. Tell everyone until someone does something!

You deserve to be heard!
 
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HisSparkPlug

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I was molested by my uncle when I was 10. I didn't tell anyone until years after it happened. But I didn't feel any better.

I'm not sure if I was also molested when I was around 3 or 4 but ever since I was a child, I've had a foggy flashback that I was molested by another girl. If it's a false memory, why would I have created something like that? I don't think I'll ever know if it's repressed or false.

I've always been shy and sometimes I think I might be bi-curious. I don't know if it's because of that. I think I might have social anxiety.

Can anyone else relate?
Hi Lonewolf,
I'm sorry to hear about what happened to you. I too have had horrible things done to me as a young girl.

To answer your question, sometimes when a person is molested or sexually violated, the victim will later feel 'bisexual' or end up living a homosexual or lesbian lifestyle and feeling that it's 'natural'. This happens for all kinds of different reasons. I'll list some of them below for you:

1. If the perpetrator(s) were men, while the child was being victimized, the child reasoned in their mind that "men" can't be safe so they gravitate towards women later in life.

2. If the perpetrator(s) were women, the child may reason in their head that they are suppose to be with a woman like this, and so gravitate towards women later in life

Those are just 2 examples of how homosexuality or 'bi-curiosity' can come about as a result of abuse. There are other reasons as well. These thoughts in the child's mind/heart are not conscious = you would not remember thinking them.

I have never struggled with same sex attraction thank heavens, but I've struggled with a lot of other stuff like drinking & partying. The Lord set me free practically instantaneously from those vices as well as a few other things. No one counselled me, God did it and God gets all the glory for it because I didn't put one ounce of effort into quitting. Abba simply lifted them off me. It was truly a miracle from Him. I still have a lot I must work through however.

The best thing you can do in order to heal from the things done to you, is draw as close to the Lord as possible = Chase Him, ask Him for more of His presence, crave Him, and all other things will be added unto you including full healing.

He loves you so very much.
God bless you child of God
 
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HisSparkPlug

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PS... My entire family turned their backs on me when I told them what happened to me as a child. I understand the bitterness and anger completely. Only God can give you the grace needed to forgive them. If they are still persecuting you and not believing you, then it's best to stay away from them and work on your relationship with Abba.
**Edit: sorry, I just realized you are too young to stay away from them. I would go with what EasyMac said and contact the authorities if no one in your family will believe you - please pray on that - it's important this man be found out and stopped from doing it again or doing it to others**


The Lord gave me this scripture in Luke 18 and told me to cling to it while I am waiting for justice. You can cling to it also:

Now He was telling them a parable to show that at all times they ought to pray and not to lose heart, 2 saying, “In a certain city there was a judge who did not fear God and did not respect man. 3 There was a widow in that city, and she kept coming to him, saying, ‘Give me legal protection from my opponent.’ 4 For a while he was unwilling; but afterward he said to himself, ‘Even though I do not fear God nor respect man, 5 yet because this widow bothers me, I will give her legal protection, otherwise by continually coming she will wear me out.’” 6 And the Lord said, “Hear what the unrighteous judge *said; 7 now, will not God bring about justice for His elect who cry to Him day and night, and will He delay long over them? 8 I tell you that He will bring about justice for them quickly.

Keep in mind that God's definition of "quickly" and "soon" are not ours.. I learned that the hard way :)
 
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