modesty help?

[IrishBay07]

I am considering starting to dress more modestly, but am not sure how to start. I'd love to wear dresses and skirts all the time, but money is tight, so I can't really afford to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe. I have already refrained from getting my hair cut, aside from the twice yearly trim to keep it healthy. Any suggestions?

 

[drjean]

You can find resources online to help.. Dress Better for Less - How to Dress Better - Good Housekeeping

but I'd say just buy one basic dress, or skirt, and then change it's look by basic jewelry, scarves, belts etc. Or with the skirt, just have a few different tops that you again accent with a few different sets of jewerly. (Joan Rivers, famous commedien, wore a black dress ONLY for years and years --and still does most of the time--but wears different jewelry, jackets etc. Suze Orman, another billionaire, wore the same dress/outfit on her show for one year---and almost no one noticed. She did this to show that it isn't what you wear....but... )

Good wishes. I think the main thing is to have a good attitude. Wear the joy of the Lord and people won't notice what clothes you're wearing so much.

 

[Verve]

Here is a slip extender tutorial that might be helpful.

icandy handmade: (tutorial) extender slip

 

[Inkachu]

Start with one or two longer dresses or skirts (shop at Walmart or thrift stores - there's no shame in that!) in neutral colors, so you can mix and match with multiple tops.

Here's a basic long skirt that's just $14 at Walmart, and comes in two great neutral colors: black & white: Walmart.com: White Stag - Women's Crinkle Skirt: Women

Tops can be tough, cause so many styles today are low-cut (if you're a "busty" woman, avoid v-necks), but a little digging around can help you find very modest and pretty/cute styles. Buy a few different colors or patterns, and just mix and match with your new skirt (s), and you've got a week's wardrobe for very little money

Here's a simple button-up for less than $10 in a bunch of different colors: Walmart.com: White Stag - Womens Cotton Classic Woven Campshirt: Women

And I don't know what size you wear (I'm plus size) but these simple, pretty, scoop-neck tees are a staple for my wardrobe I'm all about cheap and comfy! Walmart.com: Just My Size Womens Plus-Size Watercolor Graphic Tee: Women's Plus

You can do eeet!

 

[Inkachu]

Holy double post, Batman!

 

[letssee]

Here is a slip extender tutorial that might be helpful.

icandy handmade: (tutorial) extender slip

Oh this is brilliant and beautiful!

 

[Catherineanne]

I am considering starting to dress more modestly, but am not sure how to start. I'd love to wear dresses and skirts all the time, but money is tight, so I can't really afford to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe. I have already refrained from getting my hair cut, aside from the twice yearly trim to keep it healthy. Any suggestions?

I find that buying plain or block colours is more cost effective than patterns of any kind. A single black or grey skirt will match any top you care to mention; a patterned one won't. So, stick to solid colours when you are buying and then use scarves or other accessories to add colour and variety.

I am on a very limited income, and cannot buy many clothes in a year. I mostly buy plain black skirts and trousers, coloured plain tops, usually v neck, and with long sleeves, and then vest tops to go underneath (because I hate underwear showing through tops) and scarves to help cover up that bit more in church and to keep warmer.

Don't worry about replacing the whole wardrobe at once; just buy a bit at a time, and make sure that everything works with what you already have.

And I would also start with wearing skirts on Sundays, and then take it from there. See what works.

 

[Raiyuu]

I struggle a lot with modesty too. I wanna dress modest but cute as well. What I normally do is wear jeans, some flats and a plain, solid colored shirt over it. Then I would curl my hair a bit and top it off with my dove necklace.

That way it's simple and adorned. I personally don't like wearing long skirts or dresses >:[
But if you're really into just wearing long dresses and skirts and having straight long hair then that works too Everyone so far gave a lot of great advice Sorry I didn't help much :O

 

[Verve]

I struggle a lot with modesty too. I wanna dress modest but cute as well. What I normally do is wear jeans, some flats and a plain, solid colored shirt over it. Then I would curl my hair a bit and top it off with my dove necklace.

That way it's simple and adorned. I personally don't like wearing long skirts or dresses >:[
But if you're really into just wearing long dresses and skirts and having straight long hair then that works too Everyone so far gave a lot of great advice Sorry I didn't help much :O

It's okay, I think modest really depends on the person wearing it.
What works for one person doesn't work always for another.

I wear tank tops and as long as it is high enough for there to be no cleavage showing, I consider it modest. I try not to show too much leg though, skirt and short length is very important to me.

Though I also never understood the whole love of long hair thing. I love love love having short hair. Though I do wear it in a distinctly feminine style even when it is short.

 

[Raiyuu]

It's okay, I think modest really depends on the person wearing it.
What works for one person doesn't work always for another.

I wear tank tops and as long as it is high enough for there to be no cleavage showing, I consider it modest. I try not to show too much leg though, skirt and short length is very important to me.

Though I also never understood the whole love of long hair thing. I love love love having short hair. Though I do wear it in a distinctly feminine style even when it is short.

Thanks! I really like shorts but I stopped wearing them, where do your shorts normally stop? I'm kinda tall so I have a lot of leg to show and I really want to get this modesty thing right.

 

[Inkachu]

It's okay, I think modest really depends on the person wearing it.
What works for one person doesn't work always for another.

I wear tank tops and as long as it is high enough for there to be no cleavage showing, I consider it modest. I try not to show too much leg though, skirt and short length is very important to me.

Though I also never understood the whole love of long hair thing. I love love love having short hair. Though I do wear it in a distinctly feminine style even when it is short.

Good points, C! We need to be aware of our bodies and how clothes look on us. That doesn't detract from other peoples' responsibilities to control their own eyeballs, of course. But if you're a big-chested woman, you don't go around in a thin tank top and bend over to tie your shoes in public lol.

It's really dismaying to me, how modesty is becoming less and less prevalent among Christians, especially teens and young adults. Every summer, like right now, I'm sure to see teen girls wearing tiny little sundresses in church, bra straps showing, butts barely covered. And I look at their mothers and think "why?? WHY do you not see - or not care - what your daughter looks like??" I mean, if you have to hold onto your skirt when you sit down to make sure your butt doesn't pop out... HELLO lol.

I love short hair, too! I wish I had hair that was suited to short styles *sigh*. I've yet to find a hairstyle that I love and that feels comfortable all the time. My hair is so thick, that being short means it's curling and poofing and I can't control it. The only solution is to grow it out, and then it's heavy and annoying and all I can do is put it in a ponytail. I've just sort of resigned myself to "dealing" with my hair, rather than ever truly enjoying it.

/off topic babbling

Thanks! I really like shorts but I stopped wearing them, where do your shorts normally stop? I'm kinda tall so I have a lot of leg to show and I really want to get this modesty thing right.

Honey, you need to remember that your HEART and your motives and intentions are much more important to God, than how many inches above/below your knee your shorts are. There is no "measurement" that is officially pleasing to God lol. One culture might say you should wear shorts down to the knee. Another might say mid-calf. Another might say ankle-length only! I'd suggest being mindful and aware of the culture around you, then talk to God about it, and do whatever your spirit feels led to do. It shouldn't be an area of contention and stress and anxiety for you

 

[Verve]

Good points, C! We need to be aware of our bodies and how clothes look on us. That doesn't detract from other peoples' responsibilities to control their own eyeballs, of course. But if you're a big-chested woman, you don't go around in a thin tank top and bend over to tie your shoes in public lol.

It's really dismaying to me, how modesty is becoming less and less prevalent among Christians, especially teens and young adults. Every summer, like right now, I'm sure to see teen girls wearing tiny little sundresses in church, bra straps showing, butts barely covered. And I look at their mothers and think "why?? WHY do you not see - or not care - what your daughter looks like??" I mean, if you have to hold onto your skirt when you sit down to make sure your butt doesn't pop out... HELLO lol.

I love short hair, too! I wish I had hair that was suited to short styles *sigh*. I've yet to find a hairstyle that I love and that feels comfortable all the time. My hair is so thick, that being short means it's curling and poofing and I can't control it. The only solution is to grow it out, and then it's heavy and annoying and all I can do is put it in a ponytail. I've just sort of resigned myself to "dealing" with my hair, rather than ever truly enjoying it.

/off topic babbling

It's funny how it all kind of comes back to "do what works" for you.
When I have long hair it just gets in the way. It's always in my face, I've tried about a billion different ways of keeping it back with little success.

I think the teen years are tricky especially for public school kids.
That and it's hard to find something that will keep you cool in the summer that covers anything. Shopping for modest summer clothing is pretty near impossible for juniors sizes.

 

[Nienna_Lady_of_Tears]

I think the teen years are tricky especially for public school kids.
That and it's hard to find something that will keep you cool in the summer that covers anything. Shopping for modest summer clothing is pretty near impossible for juniors sizes.

Not true. If you actually shop in the Juniors department, yes. I wasn't allowed to get my clothing from there. But you could always shop the small sized Misses clothing.

 

[IrishBay07]

Thank so much to everyone for their help. So far i have purchased a long black prarrie skirt from jcpennys. Any sugestions as to where to get a good denim skirt.? Or a kaki skirt? Id like to have some skirts that are made of tougher material for days when I work(I am a nanny and chasing after kids) and for working outside.

 

[Verve]

Not true. If you actually shop in the Juniors department, yes. I wasn't allowed to get my clothing from there. But you could always shop the small sized Misses clothing.

Some stores also seem to think that once you leave the juniors department clothes can't have any fun patterns or flattering cuts. I still buy things from juniors on occasion. Most "women's" clothing is boring and frumpy.

It is possible to dress modestly without dressing like you have no fashion sense.

Thank so much to everyone for their help. So far i have purchased a long black prarrie skirt from jcpennys. Any sugestions as to where to get a good denim skirt.? Or a kaki skirt? Id like to have some skirts that are made of tougher material for days when I work(I am a nanny and chasing after kids) and for working outside.

I'd suggest pants for that. I worked daycare for a while and can't imagine a skirt being half as useful as a trusty pair a jeans. I've had skirts like that. The fabrics have a horrid range of motion.

 

[Nienna_Lady_of_Tears]

Some stores also seem to think that once you leave the juniors department clothes can't have any fun patterns or flattering cuts. I still buy things from juniors on occasion. Most "women's" clothing is boring and frumpy.

It is possible to dress modestly without dressing like you have no fashion sense.

Yeah I wasn't allowed to have a fashion sense. I was required to dress like this:

 

[Verve]

Yeah I wasn't allowed to have a fashion sense. I was required to dress like this:

And you went to public high school?

I'm so sorry.

That must have been horrible.

 

[Raiyuu]

Yeah I wasn't allowed to have a fashion sense. I was required to dress like this:

Oh my goodness! You look like my tenth grade biology teacher!! :O
The first dress is cute on you and I like that thing on your head. It's very adorable :3

 

[Nienna_Lady_of_Tears]

And you went to public high school?

I'm so sorry.

That must have been horrible.

No, I was homeschooled but the fact is that none of the homeschoolers in my area were required to dress like that full time. Even among homeschoolers I was queer. I only had one friend, and his family moved away when I was 17, mostly because he was starting to get romantically interested in me, which of course among homeschoolers was a big no-no.