Mistake?? I don't know!!

[roseglass6370]

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[Luther073082]

Sent you a PM. Let me know if that helps.

 

[The Nihilist]

Have you ever noticed how the correct answer is almost always "Eh, what the hell"

 

[Solo Man]

God hasn't turned his back on you. If this is making you uncomfortable, you need to tell your boyfriend. Remember that you are accountable to God for your sins in this life.

You may need to test the spiritual integrity of your relationship.

tell him you won't do this stuff anymore and if he agrees that you're right and you both commit to changing and honoring God until you get married, then stay together.

But if you commit to not giving into him physically and he becomes angry and tries to pressure you, then this relationship lacks the spiritual integrity necessary for it to survive.

 

[peanutbutter12]

Anything sexual, whether it's sex, oral sex, sex with clothes on, touching in questionable places... these are things reserved for marriage. The Bible says to stay away from any sexual immorality or impurities until such time as you are married. Not some, not the ones you may or may not agree with, but all. I've said it time and time again that if you wouldn't do it in front of your parents, then you probably shouldn't be doing it. A bit of a generality as many people won't make out in front of their parents either, but if you have to ask yourself if something is ok, most of the time, it's probably not.

Solo Man is also correct in that if your boyfriend doesn't respect your wishes to stop fooling around, then you need to seriously consider your relationship with this guy.

Dating and planning on one day getting married or even being engaged does not mean you're married and can do things that married couples do. Until it's finalized, you are not married. Period. I've seen many couples who were engaged only a week from the wedding call it off for whatever reasons they had. Lets say for arguments sake that you call yours off like that. Could you live with and be ok with the decision to be sexually active with him then? Or would it become a regret you have to carry with you the rest of your life?

 

[sanderse]

After going thought a very similar situation myself for three years... here is my response.

You can't get rid of the guilty feeling.
Even if he is not actually pressuring you... knowing that he wants to be intimate with you is pressure...
each person has to decide their own boundaries...Some people are okay with Kissin, some are not. Some people may be able to be more physcial with the person they are with... I don't understand how. But I also do not know if I think it is wrong.
You need to set those boundaries and stick to them. He has to support you in this. He has to be able to be strong when you are not. If he can't, It won't work.
My boyfriend and i broke up. My new boyfriend and I are extreamly reserved and our relationship is healthy because of it. There are times when we stop kissing period to emphasis the spiritual relationship between us.

 

[inari.]

I've never seen premarital sex as a bad thing, as long as it is respectful, done out of love and in a commiting relationship. Making love is a wonderful gift from God, its a way to express feelings unable to be expressed otherwise. Its not hurting anyone either.

I've known people who've done it, and they say their relationship with God hasnt suffered. They still feel Him and His love, aproval and everything.

 

[HisLittleHazelnut]

I'll try and make this as brief as possible...

I'm in a committed relationship with the man that I intend to spend the rest of my life with. Although we are not engaged yet, we have discussed marriage and it's in the "works" (he's waiting until I turn twenty to propose, he just turned 21).

We are both strong Christians who go to church. He even teaches Sunday School and plays in his praise band.

Until I started dating "Devan" I throughly intended to save myself for my wedding night. I had strict limits and had no trouble abiding by them with past boyfriends. Now though, I've found it harder than ever to stick to those "limits"...

...and I've found now that I've broken them with him in nearly every sense. I'm not even sure if I'm "a virgin" anymore (don't ask for details, and I won't give them).

"Devan" is fine with what we've done because we plan to get married and I've consented to everything...but afterwards I feel kinda guilty. I don't know if what we're doing is wrong, or if God is okay with it.


I don't know what to do. I love him. I've prayed about it so much and I feel that this is really who God wants me to be with. Everything works...I just don't know about this physical stuff.

I also wonder if because I've done these things if God is still "on my side" with other things in my life...or if He has turned His back on me.

Help? Sorry this was long...

EDIT: I realize we aren't supposed to discuss "premarital sexual activity" on this forum...if there is an issue or something PM me...I could really use some advice/prayer.

PM coming.