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Men Answer ONLY!

If your wife/partner gained a lot of weight, would that make her less HOT to you?

  • Yes

  • No

  • Depends on how much she gained.


Results are only viewable after voting.

onajourney87

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Starling2003 said:
Do men feel the same way then? Do they feel that their woman should start finding them less attractive if they gain weight?

I tend to imagine than an overweight guy isn't as attractive to women as a guy who is fit.

When I get married, my body is no longer mine, it's my wife's (1 Cor 7:4). So if she says I need to loose some weight, I'll loose some weight. If she says to get some different cologne, I'll get some different cologne. If she wants me to stop wearing t-shirts and get some shirts with buttons, I'll get some shirts with buttons.

Physical attraction is important, and I want my wife to be attracted to me.

In a loving, Jesus-centered marriage, I see little reason why that doesn't go both ways.
 
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Jedi

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SoC said:
Speak for yourself, not the rest of us.

You're kidding me, right? Physical beauty is just completely irrelevant to you? It's all about the personality? I'm sorry, but I just don't believe that. While personality may be more important than physical beauty, I cannot imagine tossing physical beauty to the winds. I'd rather have a pretty girl with a good personality than an not-so-pretty girl with a good personality and I can't conceive of any guy who would want otherwise.
 
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ByLoveAndGrace

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Jedi said:
You're kidding me, right? Physical beauty is just completely irrelevant to you? It's all about the personality? I'm sorry, but I just don't believe that. While personality may be more important than physical beauty, I cannot imagine tossing physical beauty to the winds. I'd rather have a pretty girl with a good personality than an not-so-pretty girl with a good personality and I can't conceive of any guy who would want otherwise.
I'm aware that this post says for men only, but I must respond on the basis that I am this guys girlfriend that you are basing this off of. See, he had never met me when we began talking... we were introduced through a friend and our personalities are what originally attracted the two of us. We didn't meet each other for a few weeks afterwards. He will tell you that I am beautiful, and I know he sincerely believes that, and I will tell you that he is handsome, and I sincerely believe that. But our personalities are really what attracted us first, as much as you don't want to believe that.
 
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Jedi

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Byloveandgrace said:
He will tell you that I am beautiful, and I know he sincerely believes that, and I will tell you that he is handsome, and I sincerely believe that. But our personalities are really what attracted us first, as much as you don't want to believe that.

Nothing you've said here counters what I said in my previous post. Simply because personality is the primary attraction does not negate physical attraction. Further still, what I "want" to believe has nothing to do with the issue: what I find plausible is. I perceive reality based on the evidences given, not at a whim on what I merely want reality to be. The fact remains that if you are not physically attracted to someone, the chances of you pairing up with them romantically are slim next to none. Without physical/sexual attraction, you could very well remain just friends.
 
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SoC

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Jedi said:
You're kidding me, right? Physical beauty is just completely irrelevant to you? It's all about the personality? I'm sorry, but I just don't believe that. While personality may be more important than physical beauty, I cannot imagine tossing physical beauty to the winds. I'd rather have a pretty girl with a good personality than an not-so-pretty girl with a good personality and I can't conceive of any guy who would want otherwise.

No, I am not kidding. Believe it or not, that's how I am.

I would have to say that your point of view is extremely shallow. Remember, God looks past the skin to the person's heart. It's not always easy to do, especially in a world that places so much importance on looks, but that's what we should be doing, too.

I'm not going to say that I'm not physically attracted to my girlfriend (she really is a pretty girl :D), but even if she were "ugly," I would still love her, and we would still be together.
 
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Jedi

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SoC said:
I would have to say that your point of view is extremely shallow. Remember, God looks past the skin to the person's heart. It's not always easy to do, especially in a world that places so much importance on looks, but that's what we should be doing, too.

So wait a minute, let me get this straight: a man wanting a pretty girl with a good personality over a not-so-pretty girl with an equally good personality is... shallow? Come on... There is nothing shallow about enjoying and being attracted to beauty. God made it to be enjoyed.

So let's say a guy is going out with a girl and she gets into a car wreck so that she's completely disfigured, her skin is burned to a crisp, but she's still alive. What guy is going to think "She's just as hot as she was before?" Honestly. Give the guy a picture of before and after and ask, "Now which is she more attractive in?" Simply because he would prefer her former state over the current state in no way makes him shallow. He may still LOVE her very, very much - even in her current state - but there is something to be said about physical beauty. Simply because it has often been overly emphasized does not mean that it is now inherently bad to want it or that somehow it is truly irrelevant.
 
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Jedi

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(Apparently, there's some glitch that's not posting my posts - hope this isn't a double post)


SoC said:
I would have to say that your point of view is extremely shallow. Remember, God looks past the skin to the person's heart. It's not always easy to do, especially in a world that places so much importance on looks, but that's what we should be doing, too.

So wait a minute, let me get this straight: a man wanting a pretty girl with a good personality over a not-so-pretty girl with an equally good personality is... shallow? Come on... There is nothing shallow about enjoying and being attracted to beauty. God made it to be enjoyed.

So let's say a guy is going out with a girl and she gets into a car wreck so that she's completely disfigured, her skin is burned to a crisp, but she's still alive. What guy is going to think "She's just as hot as she was before?" Honestly. Give the guy a picture of before and after and ask, "Now which is she more attractive in?" Simply because he would prefer her former state over the current state in no way makes him shallow. He may still LOVE her very, very much - even in her current state - but there is something to be said about physical beauty. Simply because it has often been overly emphasized does not mean that it is now inherently bad to want it or that somehow it is truly irrelevant.
 
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onajourney87

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God created women beautifully (not just inside either! the body is good and beautiful, to say otherwise is to cross over into gnosticism).

God also for some reason created men to be attracted to women and women to men.

I think to say "outside beauty doesn't matter" is a huge slap in the face to God; would you dare tell a respected artist that the beauty of their work didn't matter? No, so why tell that to God?

Attraction to beauty (and different perceptions of "more" and "less" beautiful) is not something Satan cooked up overnight to insert into the human genome. It's a God-given thing within us, and I really don't see how we can reject it without being arrogant.

/me goes to fill up his stock of waterballoons which will undoubtably be needed after that post
 
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Jedi

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SoC said:
I would have to say that your point of view is extremely shallow. Remember, God looks past the skin to the person's heart. It's not always easy to do, especially in a world that places so much importance on looks, but that's what we should be doing, too.

So... a man wanting a pretty girl with a good personality over a not-so-pretty girl with an equally good personality is... shallow? Come on... There is nothing shallow about enjoying and being attracted to beauty. God made it to be enjoyed.

So let's say a guy is going out with a girl and she gets into a car wreck so that she's completely disfigured, her skin is burned to a crisp, but she's still alive. What guy is going to think "She's just as hot as she was before?" Honestly. Give the guy a picture of before and after and ask, "Now which is she more attractive in?" Simply because he would prefer her former state over the current state in no way makes him shallow. He may still LOVE her very, very much - even in her current state - but there is something to be said about physical beauty. Simply because it has often been overly emphasized does not mean that it is now inherently bad to want it or that somehow it is truly irrelevant.
 
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Jedi

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Love is an act of the will that leads to action on behalf of its object - it doesn't blind a person so that physical beauty somehow becomes completely irrelevant. You may love them regardless, but you'd still prefer beauty over non-beauty.
 
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Llauralin

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Yes, I know I'm a girl, but...

In defense of those accused of shallowness: isn't "hot" a term invented to express the shallower aspects of attractiveness? If we were speaking of beloved, lovely, dear, or even perhaps attractive, there would be a legitimate complaint, but that wasn't the question. The question, however, was "hot," a particular kind of sexually defined beauty.
 
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Sketcher

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Llauralin said:
Yes, I know I'm a girl, but...

In defense of those accused of shallowness: isn't "hot" a term invented to express the shallower aspects of attractiveness? If we were speaking of beloved, lovely, dear, or even perhaps attractive, there would be a legitimate complaint, but that wasn't the question. The question, however, was "hot," a particular kind of sexually defined beauty.
Thank you very much, you hit it on the nose.
 
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