Marriage

[Christian_Follower]

Been married a long while now and it feels like it's taking a toll... Now I know marriage is work (hard work) and a blessing from God but man oh man, WHY couldn't it be easier... I'm not saying conflicts because I know compared to many others marriage for you could very well be worse (and especially for those who are now divorced)

I don't have really much to complain about, I guess I'm venting a bit.. I love her so much and sometimes I feel miles away from her.

Anyway... I'm done venting... thanks for listening

 

[HereIStand]

Living with someone all the time can be tough. It bothers me when people make marriage out to be too rosy. It's can be rewarding but it can be tough. God bless.

 

[JRichard68]

.. I love her so much and sometimes I feel miles away from her.

Talk to your wife and start with this^^^^
Be as specific with her as you can as to what that means, though. If you're not sure, put some thought into it so you can let her know. Wives don't know our internal "world" and thoughts about our marriage - and sometimes we don't want to bring it up for fear of upsetting the cart - but in the end we owe it to them so the marriage bond ultimately grows. I've made those very mistakes and it hasn't ended well.

 

[Christian_Follower]

Talk to your wife and start with this^^^^
Be as specific with her as you can as to what that means, though. If you're not sure, put some thought into it so you can let her know. Wives don't know our internal "world" and thoughts about our marriage - and sometimes we don't want to bring it up for fear of upsetting the cart - but in the end we owe it to them so the marriage bond ultimately grows. I've made those very mistakes and it hasn't ended well.

I already have, many many times... I'm sick of talking, and tired of fighting this fight.... I'll just remain celibate.

The main issue is intimacy and it sounds bad but when it only happens once every 5-6 months and (yes she's aware of my frustration) it becomes to much at times I then I start to reticent her. Again, I love her a lot but I don't know how much longer my heart and body can take.... I'm to the point of getting sick

 

[Tropicalbaby]

I'm in the same boat as you. I feel miles away from him Intimacy is pretty much non existant I have talked to him about this many times and have prayed about what to do about it. I got nothing

 

[Kurt Warner]

For those whose spouses aren't fulfilling that need what are their responses for why? Unless they are withholding as an expression of passive-aggressive anger, there may be reasons which can be successfully addressed. All things being equal, women have the ability to enjoy sex more than men. If they are not taking advantage of that ability the question becomes, why? If a man is not interested/withholding do they have testosterone issues? Was the person sexually abused or raised to believe sex is "bad" or that it is for the benefit of one gender over the other? Is it not satisfying for one partner because their spouse doesn't understand the process and therefore has flawed expectations. When this issue exists, the underlying reasons need to be identified.

 

[Miguel jay]

Marriage is extremely difficult! ...and yes a blessing from God.

Remember marriage represents the relationship Christ has with His Bride. Satan knows this and would fight you both right up to he’s broken it, so he can turn to Christ in happiness that he’s destroyed another part of the gospel in the world! Also, two sinners coming together is going to cause conflict, also, laziness with couples fighting for their marriage is going to be another issue. Marriage is extremely difficult, I’m having my own issues at present. I’m just trusting in God to change things around. That’s all that’s required from us. That we make sure we’re living for Christ. Come what may, that’s the acid test.

 

[Endeavourer]

Here are some helpful articles to read about your situation.

My husband and I follow these concepts carefully - rather dogmatically - and as a result we have a marriage more wonderful, fulfilling and intimate than either of us imagined possible. We can observe how these concepts directly contribute to the joy in our marriage.

The question of the ages: How can a husband receive the sex he needs in marriage? by Dr. Willard F. Harley, Jr.

The Policy of Unidivided Attention

What's the difference between lovemaking and sex?

What do you think of these concepts?

 

[Dave-W]

What do you think of these concepts?

First off, I am very leery of anything from Harley.
Secondly, the first article is already going in the wrong direction, just from the title.

 

[jameseb]

For what it is worth, I sometimes feel the same. It at least brings me some comfort knowing I'm not the only one.