Marriage Crumbling.. HELP !

[Djj1973]

Good evening. This is my first time here. I need help. I was raised a Lutheran but haven't continued to go to church for many years. My marriage is crumbling. I've been married to my beautiful wife for 23 years. We have 2 handsome boys, both in their teenage years. My wife took a job in Michigan 5 months ago. My boys and I went out to see her 10 days ago. We got into a stupid argument and as always things were said that shouldn't have been. The next morning she told me she is no longer in love with me and wants a divorce. She swears there is nobody else she's interested in. Now, our marriage has had a lot of good times and its fair share of bad. That's normal for a marriage. But I thought that things were pretty good. She's a wonderful person and would do anything for her family. She's kind, full of happiness and a joy to be with. She is my world. We agreed to give it a year and see if we can work through this before a divorce. Since our last argument, she has turned cold and callas. She said she still cares about me and will not leave me hanging fianancially. She wants to be friends for our sake and the kids. I'm devestated. Another problem has surfaced... our current lease here is up in 12 days. Our original plan was to move to Michigan and be a complete family again next week but now she doesn't want me there. She said if anything changes it is going to take time. So she's been helping me find a home or apt to live in for the next 12 months. How can I work on our marriage, show her differently from 2000 miles away ? How can I be an effective father for my boys from 2000 miles away ? I'm been researching a lot online, started taking an online class to learn to be a better partner, and talking to other Christians for advice. I'm lost and confused. Whenever I start talking about this and the financial strain this is going to cause on us, she shuts down and tells me I'm pushing her to hard. We are out of time. I understand she needs space. What do I do ? How do I want her to WANT me again ?

 

[nChrist]

You and your family will be in my prayers. I really don't think you'll find answers for your problems on the Internet. Maybe you should also try prayer and then try again.

 

[Odetta]

She may keep you out of whatever house/apartment she's living in now, but she can't keep you out of the whole state. Go, if only to be near your kids. Honestly, it sounds to me like she wanted out of the marriage before the Michigan job even came to be. I'm sorry. You seem blindsided.