I became involved with someone in an affair... during a time I was not walking with the Lord. We wound up marrying... but then divorced for financial advantage. We had many problems with the blended family and I never felt at peace... the guilt weighed me down until I finally broke. Living with someone I wasn't married to any longer plus the way the relationship started, left me so spiritually bankrupt. Finally, I got down on my knees and asked God's forgiveness and to help me make my life right. As I'm not legally married and my significant other is not a bible-believing Christian, I felt obedience to God is to separate and then create a proper relationship in the future... when we can get married and when we are more aligned in our faith. I am moving next week and devastated. I'd love some encouragement, ideas, etc., about the importance of being equally yoked as well as emotional and physical love and attraction. I am afraid to move out, but am doing so in a stand for God... something I regret not doing before.
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Making Break... Need Support
- Thread starter lilleycom
- Start date
HI!!
I too was living with the father of my child. We were both raised in church but were not living like we should. I got me and the child back into church. I was convicted about what I was doing...I truly wanted us to be a family but there was so much strife and stuff that it was terrible...drinking partying etc were included...on his part not mine..I was ready to grow up...he was not...I just felt I had to leave for God to fix the situation..I could not fix it..and staying in the situation was an obediance to Him...those were my convictions...maybe not for everybody that is just how I felt...I ahve been moved out for 5 months...things are ok...they got wonderful for a while but I allowed my insecurities to ruin things! We still see one another and communicate b/c of our child..I can see alot of answered prayers and I know God is moving in our lives...BUT being human I get impatient and want everything to be just right..right now!!!! And I am having to wait on God's perfect work in both of us...cause I had faults too! It was hard to leave, but I know it was the right thing and god can move and bless b/c of my obediance! Let me know how things go...hoope this helps somewhat! You did not mention but were you both married to other people when the affair started?
I too was living with the father of my child. We were both raised in church but were not living like we should. I got me and the child back into church. I was convicted about what I was doing...I truly wanted us to be a family but there was so much strife and stuff that it was terrible...drinking partying etc were included...on his part not mine..I was ready to grow up...he was not...I just felt I had to leave for God to fix the situation..I could not fix it..and staying in the situation was an obediance to Him...those were my convictions...maybe not for everybody that is just how I felt...I ahve been moved out for 5 months...things are ok...they got wonderful for a while but I allowed my insecurities to ruin things! We still see one another and communicate b/c of our child..I can see alot of answered prayers and I know God is moving in our lives...BUT being human I get impatient and want everything to be just right..right now!!!! And I am having to wait on God's perfect work in both of us...cause I had faults too! It was hard to leave, but I know it was the right thing and god can move and bless b/c of my obediance! Let me know how things go...hoope this helps somewhat! You did not mention but were you both married to other people when the affair started?
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pete56
A Beloved Son of God!
Lilley,
Bless you, you sound like you are really struggling.
Your post leaves many questions unanswered, that will obviously have a bearing on your future and will limit any advice that may be appropriate here.
Anyway, I assume from your post that you did not have children with your S/O, but that you both have children from previous relationships.
You don't say how your S/O reacted to your new found faith but I guess it was not possitively.
So on that basis, I think you probably are making the right decision, (my advice would be different if any of the children are both yours and his together, as a child needs to know its father). I am not sure what financial advantage you gained by divorcing and co-habiting, but it certainly does not honour God and does not honour the marriage. If your S/O wants to be in your life then he needs to recognise you and honour you above all other people.
Of course in my view, I think he will also need to give his heart and life to Jesus, as you have, as well, because living in an unequally yoked marriage is very difficult.
So Lilley, be brave, take courage and follow where God is leading you, and He will bless you and give you the desires of your heart. But I must also say, be prepared to be patient - God's timing is not as immediate as ours!
Pete
Bless you, you sound like you are really struggling.
Your post leaves many questions unanswered, that will obviously have a bearing on your future and will limit any advice that may be appropriate here.
Anyway, I assume from your post that you did not have children with your S/O, but that you both have children from previous relationships.
You don't say how your S/O reacted to your new found faith but I guess it was not possitively.
So on that basis, I think you probably are making the right decision, (my advice would be different if any of the children are both yours and his together, as a child needs to know its father). I am not sure what financial advantage you gained by divorcing and co-habiting, but it certainly does not honour God and does not honour the marriage. If your S/O wants to be in your life then he needs to recognise you and honour you above all other people.
Of course in my view, I think he will also need to give his heart and life to Jesus, as you have, as well, because living in an unequally yoked marriage is very difficult.
So Lilley, be brave, take courage and follow where God is leading you, and He will bless you and give you the desires of your heart. But I must also say, be prepared to be patient - God's timing is not as immediate as ours!
Pete
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