Make the Choice Today

[Mark Dohle]

Make the Choice Today

There is a kind of guilt that keeps souls far from Me—such guilt is the effect of wounded pride, of a deep disappointment in one’s flawed self. Never succumb to the guilt that whispers: “Stay away. It is no use. There is nothing left here for you. You are incapable of the vocation you thought you heard. Accept your failure to live it and admit that you were deceived.” This is not My voice. It is rather the voice of the accuser who borrows all the voices of your past, still alive in your memory, and makes use of them to assault you with a barrage of lies that are calculated to bring you down and cause you to despair.

A Benedictine Monk. In Sinu Jesu: When Heart Speaks to Heart--The Journal of a Priest at Prayer (p. 251). Angelico Press. Kindle Edition.

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It is hard for me to realize with any real consistency that I am my own obstacle to a deeper union with Jesus. In that struggle, I can become overly focused on myself, how I am doing etc. It is a waste of time, I know it, yet I can continue to do so.

We all have a calling in life. A vocation to live that calling out. I do not believe that one way of life is superior to another, but that each has its place in this world, each is important.

So here I am, an old man, with a body that isn’t what it used to be, a mind that can be forgetful, often in funny ways, and yet my desire for Christ is deeper, and my trust more all-consuming…….yet the struggle is the same. Perhaps the only difference is that I no longer look to my own misery, but to the light, love, compassion, and perfection of the Infinite Heart that loves me and all of the me’s in the world.

Get out of the boat, dive out, jump out, into the raging inner sea and look to Jesus who will see us all through these storms.

Over the years in this Monastery, I have learned that it is impossible to ‘shake’ the love of Jesus. I am sought after, hounded, and over and over again through the love of Christ brought to my knees with a desire to either continue or to begin again if need be. time can receive the grace to be Spirit-filled, compassionate, loving human beings, who are concerned for others, and in all of this to grow in trust God’s love for each of us, no matter the outcome.

Some reading this, and maybe the writer, will not survive this. Some will die of the Pandemic, others from other health issues, or simply from old age. Yet we live each day to its fullness and seek to help those we meet on a regular basis.

My community has received the vaccine. No bad results, and the first one we got in January, the second in February. So for the time being I believe we have a level of protection that perhaps those who do not get the vaccine do not have. Yet, we need to understand, this is still developing, so deepen your love of God, trust in God, and spend time in prayer, which is at bottom a simple opening up one’s heart to God’s love.

Let us pray for one another, love one another, and hopefully lets us stop this bickering. If there is a demonic presence in all of this, I would call it a “Bickering Spirit”………so let’s stop, listen, and move on. We cannot change anyone’s mind, a waste of time to try to do so. On youtube, one can find any number of presentations that will back up any position, with all kinds of titles behind the name. While technology is good, it has also created a very high ‘Tower of Babel’.

So today, make the conscious choice to ‘Trust God’, and in times of trouble both inner and outer, deepen that trust, rooted in love.

God Bless us all and protect us!-Br.MD