Make peace with...

[heartnsoul]

Hello everyone,

I thought I'd start off a new SERIOUS thread about people we have in our lives that we need to make peace with. It may be a coworker that we had an argument with, a family member that we haven't spoken to in years or anyone in general that we have avoided.

For me, I probably need to make peace with my brother who is one year younger than me. We have totally different philosophies and do not see eye to eye on a lot of things. We haven't spoken in years and there are probably a lot of hidden resentment on his part that I don't even know about. I may have said something that might have offended him years ago and neither one of us care to mend the relationship. Hopefully someday I'll pick up the phone and iron things out with him.

 

[FlatpickingJD]

heartnsoul, let me ask you to please do that -to make peace w/your brother. My father and his sister didn't talk for years because of a misunderstanding they had decades before. They were barely civil to each other, for their mother's sake, but that was it. Then their mother died, and my father couldn't afford to go to the funeral and neither has spoken to the other since. This is the single thing that my grandmother wanted resolved in her life, to have her children have a good relationship again. It might be too late for them, but I pray that you reconcile w/your brother.

I suppose before I point out the speck in your eye, though, I should take note of the log in mine. I don't have a great relationship with my sister and I need to fix that. We've both taken baby steps, but are both afraid of doing something to upset the other again that we're both frozen in place.

Thanks for the reminder.

 

[heartnsoul]

Thanks JD for your advice. I know what you mean...it's just difficult to swallow our pride and do what we know is right. What makes it even harder for me is that no one in our family likes my brother's current wife. So my brother may be in a tough spot to even try having a relationship with his own siblings because of his wife's anti-family attitude.

But nevertheless, you're right. I should try to mend that relationship...not saying we'll end up very close, but at least smooth out any misunderstandings and start from ground zero again.

I also have a younger sister that is three years younger than me and we're just taking baby steps and "frozen" right now just like you and your sister. My sister takes a lot of things personally and being that she is the youngest one in our family, she kind of still has that "sibling rivalry" towards her big sister (me) who followed in my footsteps in school and never measured up to my grades and other areas. It's childhood stuff that I have let go years ago but I think my sister may harbor some rivalry STILL. And to some extent, my brother is also STILL trying to compete with me. I know I will have to overlook their immaturity and move past that and just be "civil" to them with an understanding and loving heart.

 

[Tattered]

My sister and I were never able to completely make peace before she died. I know she thought I hated her because I wouldn't talk to her more than the standard "Hi ... how are you ... bye" sorts of conversations. I loved her very much, but was unable to get her to respect my boundaries. It makes me very sad to think we never resolved that. On the otherhand, I know she's in heaven and knows the truth now.

 

[heartnsoul]

My sister and I were never able to completely make peace before she died. I know she thought I hated her because I wouldn't talk to her more than the standard "Hi ... how are you ... bye" sorts of conversations. I loved her very much, but was unable to get her to respect my boundaries. It makes me very sad to think we never resolved that. On the otherhand, I know she's in heaven and knows the truth now.

Wow, well after reading your story, I'm feeling more convicted to pick up the phone and call my sister.

 

[CherylLynn]

My sister Dana who is just an user. She doesn't want to hear the truth. She thinks I should just ignore her drug habit. She is living with a guy and raising HIS girls when she has a son she is ignoring. He told me I would be more of a grandmother than his own mother would be.

My nieghbor. He has these dogs that he WILL NOT control and when my hubby shot his dog (dog was attacking the ducks) he went off. Sheriff took our side and he wasn't happy. He is now trying a little. He has a trepass warrant that if he steps on our property he will be arrested. He threatened to kill us all. I think it was in the heat of the moment but I am not taking any chances. Next step is Judge Pruitt.