Tropical Wilds
Little Lebowski Urban Achiever
- Oct 2, 2009
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Just to be clear, I don't joke like that about men...
Oftentimes the biggest tough talkers are the dudes who are the most whipped - and I'm talking shared-Facebook-accounts levels of whipped. But all in all I would chalk it up to nothing more than a case of "guy jokes". Women joke like this too.
Here’s a brief summary to whet your appetite:
1. A Manly Pastor. Men don’t like macho or power-hungry pastors, but a pastor who projects a healthy masculinity will draw men. This is because men see their churches through their pastor. If a man respects his pastor, then he likes his church. If a man doesn’t respect his pastor, he won’t like his church. Go ahead, ask a man about his church. He won’t talk about the ministries, or the facilities, or the programs; he’ll talk about the pastor.
- See more at: Ten Ways to Man Up Your Church
I think, if you polled all the men and women in this forum, you'd find that the crass jokes are largely on the men's side. Not because women are superior or any such nonsense, but because men are more about impressing other men and maintaining an appearance of control and strength. Getting all dewy-eyed and emotional and gushing about your wife is not exactly conducive to fist-bumps when mingling with the guys. Men like to "maintain a status" when they socialize; women aren't so much like that, we're more about connecting and communicating. Hopefully it's a different story among Christian men, at least.
As a woman, and having worked around large groups of women (both Christian and unbelievers) for the past 20 years, I can say that the ladies do not sit around berating their husbands or making inappropriate comments about cheating on them or not wanting to be home with them, or what-have-you. Have I EVER heard that sort of thing? Yes, but very, very rarely. As in, I couldn't tell you the last time I heard something like that.
Ha. Who knew I would set off a defensiveness avalanche with the ladies? Let me make it perfectly clear: if you don't joke dirty, that does not mean it doesn't happen ever. Don't get it twisted. This charade of "clean woman with no dirty thoughts or words" is tiring. You may be this, but it's an extension of church misogyny that this uber sterile standard is so pervasive.
Yeah because women are more secretive about it. They will do it when men or when "clean" women aren't around. Or when the alcohol begins talking. And as far as sex talk goes, women are both dirtier and more detailed than men are.
Which women are these? I loathe dirty jokes and I have never, ever discussed details of sex with other women. I'm not a prude, there are just boundaries in life, and my sex life with my husband has a major boundary alllll the way around it. That's not to say that I don't ever complain about my dh, because I have been known to whine to my close friends every now and then - but I don't do it where it is public, like here on CF. The laughable thing is, if you were able to see the women's forum - which I know you can't - there are no threads about sex that I can recall ever seeing. Is that true of the men's forum? There is certainly no getting down and dirty revealing everything.
Also, if women are so secretive about these stories they tell - and don't do it when men and "clean" women are around - how do you know it happens? It can't have been said in your hearing because you're a man, so either you know "dirty" women who tell you what they discuss, or you're just guessing. Either way, these women must be a tiny minority if nobody here seems to have met any of them.
And then I happened to go in there and see a thread that was recently transferred over. LOL.
Ha. Who knew I would set off a defensiveness avalanche with the ladies? Let me make it perfectly clear: if you don't joke dirty, that does not mean it doesn't happen ever. Don't get it twisted. This charade of "clean woman with no dirty thoughts or words" is tiring. You may be this, but it's an extension of church misogyny that this uber sterile standard is so pervasive.
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