Thank you for sharing that honest post. It's the only post I've read on this forum in the past year that has induced a small tinge of regret that I abandoned Christianity. Sadly, I've lost count of those with the opposite effect.
There are many sincere Christians on the forum, whom I can fully respect, even when we may differ radically on certain specifics. Then there are the others. . . . . .
Hey partner, let me just put it this way..the main adversaries of a Christian are the fakes, the wolves in sheepskin..nothing will test a christian’s faith more..some are so wicked hypocritical they will have you question your Faith. At the same time these hypocrites are a great blessing to one’s faith..it’s hard to explain really. But I’ve dealt with some real snakes in my time and I consider them a tremendous blessing in my walk with the Lord.
Read Matthew chapter 23..and remember, ‘as it once was, it will be again’ (Ecclesiastes 1:9). Have a good read of that chapter and meditate on it..that’s what the Lord Jesus Christ thinks of manmade religion haha. Also, read the parable of the prodigal son..and also maybe you can relate to this one:
“But what think ye? A certain man had two sons; and he came to the first, and said, Son, go work to day in my vineyard. He answered and said, I will not: but afterward he repented, and went. And he came to the second, and said likewise. And he answered and said, I go, sir: and went not. Whether of them twain did the will of his father? They say unto him, The first. Jesus saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That the publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of God before you.”
—Matthew 21:28-31
It ain’t how ya start it’s how ya finish!
Remember..Christ’s greatest enemies during His earthly ministry were not the publicans, harlots, Roman government, the drunks, sorcerers, and gluttons, etc..they were the religious hypocrites!
“And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others:Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.”
—Luke 18:9-14
I also love this passage very much:
“When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory: And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats: And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not. Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee? Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.”
—Matthew 25:31-46
Easy to see what the Lord Jesus Christ is about, and it ain’t religious rituals in a fancy building full of stuffy people LOL..I understand if some may have discouraged you, but remember:
“But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.”
—Matthew 18:6
God doesn’t dwell in buildings..He brought me to Him one evening as I was neck deep in sin, surrounded by a cloud of marijuana smoke and warring with 2 different groups of enemies LOL, and I had little to zero religious experience my whole life.
I pray and believe some day He will draw you in, remember..it is Christ whom we are to go by as an example, not the flawed mortal humans, many of which never had that Luke 18:13-14 moment in their life.
“ For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.”
—2 Corinthians 7:10
“The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.“
—Psalm 34:18