Just turned 40

[vrunca]

O.k, here is the problem...I just turned 40. I always said that age is only a number and your as old as you act and It'll never bother me...but here I am at 40 and all alone . I have been single since I was 24, shortly after I had my third child and I have raised my wonderful kids myself and I am happy about this. I always felt comfortable in my singleness, kind of with the attitude that if I ever find someone, well that will be nice, but I am ok alone too. Then I turned 40 .

What the heck happened to me? I am lonely feeling, I have no ambition anymore and I am sad. I have always been happy and excited about life, then one day **bam** I turn 40 and I fall apart? Has this happened to anyone else, especially the loneliness, that I am really having a hard time accepting.

 

[caitlincares]

So sorry.

I turned 40 this past Monday but I am mostly okay with it.

 

[LadyDJ]

So far I don't recall having any issues with any of the "milestone" birthdays I've had...I can only hope and pray that continues...

Vrunca, I hope you find your way back to being happy and that being lonely doesn't hold you back. (might also be a little bout of depression)

 

[wildthing]

40 just a number. I like trying new things So I never let a number stand in the way. People say they start falling apart at forty. I can not say that I have. but it will come sure as winter.

I still think you have a great little friend (at least you show pictures of him at the bottom of your post) Although I do not talk to my cat I do hold him. I find that he is real company. The best thing is that his love for you is unconditional. Does this sound like someone else that we know??

I know off the subject

I know the greatest time I am alone is when I turn my back on God. Good thing about God is always there for you. Get to know him read the Bible join a Bible study or even try to learn new stuff, here we go again I am learning how to fence but this does not have to be the thing you try. Do just try to get involoved with things. But please don't sit around and do nothing.

 

[MemphisFran]

Hello!


I am also 40 (soon to be 41). I have never been married. Yes, life can get lonely. Pray for God's will in your life. Ask God to reveal to you what He has planned for you or what outcome will happen out of you being single. Maybe there is that mate out there for you but God is still working on them for you. Maybe it's that God needs you to be single to do what will glorify Him. The bottom line is, it's not about You (or me or anyone else). It's about God. I can say this not as someone who knows it all or has it all together but as someone that God is working on in this area. I've prayed many times for God to send me a husband. I chose to be a single parent and adopted a little boy. He's 8 now. I was his foster parent and adopted him. He needs a Dad really bad and really craves for that. There must be some reason God is not answering that prayer yet. I refuse to believe it's because He doesn't hear me. If you are a parent or if others are parents maybe can relate to this, you know how when kids ask for the same thing over and over you get tired of hearing it. I am not asking anymore...I have made my request, God knows that is my request...now I just ask for the perseverance to get me to the point where God will grant my request. There must be some purpose. Are you involved at church? Being single does not have to mean lonely. But I do know that it can feel lonely. Wanna chat, I can listen. (I am also a social worker, I paid to learn how to listen, so I think I am decent at it! I also know how it is to be single in a couple kind of world. Especially at our age. I hope this is helpful and not judgmental because I surely mean it as encouragement! Keep the faith!

Remember this:

Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have* peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us. Romans 5:1-5

I hope you are feeling a lot of hope now!
Keep the faith!
Fran

 

[Johnboy60]

Hi, I have never been married either and I have no children. I don't miss being married because I never have been. With all the divorces people have these days and alot of women at my age have been married two or three times I would rather stay single. I have meet many young lady's in their 20's that have been married and have 3 or more children and their husbands left them because they didn't want to surport the family. These men doesn't realize children is a gift from God.

Robert.

 

[caitlincares]

Are you doing better vrunca?

 

[Glenn316]

Vrunca, I can relate to being lonely. I was single till I was 47. It must have been difficult being a single parent for so long. In some ways we will always be alone, 'cause no person can know us like Jesus can. Yet, I pray that you can find some friends to share the burden with.

 

[peaseblossom]

Vrunca,

I have experienced loneliness too. I just turned 40 and sometimes I get extremely discouraged. I have decided to spend more time seeking God to help me get through this. Finding a Christian Forum has certainly helped.

 

[HisWinterRose]

I will soon be 47 which means ........... 3 YEARS till I am 50 !! So, that will be a milstone for me and that same year ... my 16 year old will then be 18 & will graduate from HIGH SCHOOL !! So, it's a bit scary for me ... but I know that I'll have the LORD on my side & I will get throught it !! So, you can get through this !!

 

[Nobody Special]

Hi Vrunca.

I know how you feel and what you mean. When I hit that milestone, I went over the same bump. It took me about a year to get over it, but what I did was got up off my bumm and went to the singles events. I started walking or riding my bike, and doing a lot more active things, even when I felt beat. I pushed and made the changes I needed to make to get the engery back. And I started take vitamins every day.

The one thing I found out, the hard way, was that I had to make the effort to get out there and get back to living life. I went to all the Christian funtions I could find, even the ones for the "younger" mature singles. Oh sure, I had to take the time to rest some days, but in the end I found that it made a huge differance. The biggest part of it is getting, and staying, active. For some reason it helps take of that "I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M 40!!" thing.

Oh, and do some goofy things, just for fun. Like... oh, I don't know. Ok, here's one for you:

Go to the mini-mart and get one of those wide based coffee mugs. (I did this one time and got a lot of great reactions!) Carefully cut the bottom off the mug at the seam. If there's some foam stuff in there, take some out and put in a strong magnet right in the bottom. Now seal it back up with a good glue.

Now you'll have to test this to see if it works, but fill it with coffee, go out to your car and place it on the roof above the driver's door, place it where you can reach it from inside the car, just to make sure it's there. (Do you see where this is going?) Now start driving slowly, then speed up a little as you go. Once in a while check to see if it's still there. I got up to 67 before it finally flew off.

Ok, so once you've tested it and know how fast you can go before it falls off, drive to church with it on the roof, or even work with it on the roof of your car. Make sure you fill it with hot coffee, or whatever you like to drink. As you start out, people will try to let you know it's there. Just wave, smile and keep going. When you get to where you're going, get out with your things, close the car and reach up and take the mug off the roof.... a hint here.. slid it toward you, don't try to lift it up. When somebody asks you why that was on the roof, just tell them the coffee was too hot to drink, and you wanted to cool it down!!

God Bless!!

NS

 

[SpiritPsalmist]

I turned 40 some years back. In fact this year I turned 50 I've never been married and even though sometimes I feel pretty lonely I find that as long as I keep myself busy that I don't have time to feel sorry for myself. There are many people out there who can learn from your experiences. . .40 does not equil dead

 

[SpiritPsalmist]

Go to the mini-mart and get one of those wide based coffee mugs. (I did this one time and got a lot of great reactions!) Carefully cut the bottom off the mug at the seam. If there's some foam stuff in there, take some out and put in a strong magnet right in the bottom. Now seal it back up with a good glue.

Now you'll have to test this to see if it works, but fill it with coffee, go out to your car and place it on the roof above the driver's door, place it where you can reach it from inside the car, just to make sure it's there. (Do you see where this is going?) Now start driving slowly, then speed up a little as you go. Once in a while check to see if it's still there. I got up to 67 before it finally flew off.

Ok, so once you've tested it and know how fast you can go before it falls off, drive to church with it on the roof, or even work with it on the roof of your car. Make sure you fill it with hot coffee, or whatever you like to drink. As you start out, people will try to let you know it's there. Just wave, smile and keep going. When you get to where you're going, get out with your things, close the car and reach up and take the mug off the roof.... a hint here.. slid it toward you, don't try to lift it up. When somebody asks you why that was on the roof, just tell them the coffee was too hot to drink, and you wanted to cool it down!!

God Bless!!

NS

You really did that?????

 

[Nobody Special]

Yep, I did it a few times. I love the reactions of the people that see me driving down the road with it on the roof of the car. You get the people that do the double takes and triple takes.... it gets to be funny.

 

[robert1021]

I suppose it would work with a teacup? here in uk you think!, theyre smaller though!!

 

[GMRELIC]

I am 42 now and it really hasn't bothered me much, except for the receeding hairline
and the wrinkles, but thank goodness for the invention of botox, the wrinkles arn't much of a problem anymore and hoping to get the hair thing taken care of in December. I enjoy being single, have been for 13 years, and have no intentions of remarrying at this point in my life, maybe someday, but who knows.

 

[MeekOne]

O.k, here is the problem...I just turned 40. I always said that age is only a number and your as old as you act and It'll never bother me...but here I am at 40 and all alone . I have been single since I was 24, shortly after I had my third child and I have raised my wonderful kids myself and I am happy about this. I always felt comfortable in my singleness, kind of with the attitude that if I ever find someone, well that will be nice, but I am ok alone too. Then I turned 40 .

What the heck happened to me? I am lonely feeling, I have no ambition anymore and I am sad. I have always been happy and excited about life, then one day **bam** I turn 40 and I fall apart? Has this happened to anyone else, especially the loneliness, that I am really having a hard time accepting.

Hi Vrunca. I understand exactly where you are coming from. Funny thing, I don't turn forty until February, but I feel the same feelings you are feeling. I don't know what happends to us at this age. It seems that we are not the only ones who feel that way either. I must say that I am grateful to God for my life, and for His Word most of all because without it, life would be without purpose.

When I feel like that, I must truly run, not walk, but run to the Bible.....that is where He speaks to me and quiets my soul. Our Father has given us a way to know He is with us, and it rests in His Word. When you feel like this, make a habit to get some scripture time at that very moment, this way you know you are not alone. He is with you. I pray that the peace of Jesus Christ may rest in your heart always.

 

[66hearts]

It's scary sometimes, especially when we find ourselves dwelling on our age, lonliness, of course that breeds anxiety. I haven't been alone for more than a few years at a time but now that I look back, I should have been.
Pray to the Lord to bring you a mate. He asks us to have faith in Him for everything and there is nothing shameful or weak to get down on your knees and pray for a mate just as you pray for anything else.
Lord, VRUNCA is a single Christian and she would like a mate. We pray to you Lord that her single days will come to an end soon, very soon, and she will live the rest of her life with her mate that you will so carefully choose for her. Meanwhile, give her strength and courage to live as a single woman but remind her in her heart that she is not alone. In Jesus' name, amen.