just got off work

[ANN2626]

as i sit here...just got off work, im drinking and smoking (cigarettes) i know its not good for me a part of me wants to stop this horrible addiction but a part of me cant put it down. i also work at a bar/restaurant...which i know is not good for me. im just lonely and know i have to get up for work tomorrow since i work in the AM and i cant take sleeping pills and i dont have anyone to talk to. i dont know if its the whole thing about my panic disorder or if its because i cant sleep without it and i cant stand to be awake later than 2am. i really dont know what exactly it is. a part of me wants help but im too embarassed to admit it...especially this young and if my rents knew (who live in PA, i live in SC) they would freak out. i was brought up in such a good christian home its embarrasing. i also live with my boyfriend (which is gone everyother month for work) but they hate that too. i just feel like a horrible daughter and a horrible person. they brought me up so right and i just rebel. i dont know why i am like that.
i just really need prayers and somebody to talk to

 

[PrairieGurl]

as i sit here...just got off work, im drinking and smoking (cigarettes) i know its not good for me a part of me wants to stop this horrible addiction but a part of me cant put it down. i also work at a bar/restaurant...which i know is not good for me. im just lonely and know i have to get up for work tomorrow since i work in the AM and i cant take sleeping pills and i dont have anyone to talk to. i dont know if its the whole thing about my panic disorder or if its because i cant sleep without it and i cant stand to be awake later than 2am. i really dont know what exactly it is. a part of me wants help but im too embarassed to admit it...especially this young and if my rents knew (who live in PA, i live in SC) they would freak out. i was brought up in such a good christian home its embarrasing. i also live with my boyfriend (which is gone everyother month for work) but they hate that too. i just feel like a horrible daughter and a horrible person. they brought me up so right and i just rebel. i dont know why i am like that.
i just really need prayers and somebody to talk to

Dearest Ann,

First off...you are NOT horrible daughter and NOT a horrible person. You are a woman who made some wrong choices and wants to change!

I also was brought up in a "good Christian" home. Talk about rebel...some say I wrote the book on rebeling! Our parents raise us the best they know how...we then come to an age where we have to make our own decisions.

I'm sitting here...having a cigarette and drinking a glass of water...(been alcohol free for 25 days ) Don't worry about quitting both at the same time (booze and smokes), even my doc, who is a great man of God, said to work on the "smoke" part when I get more stable with the non alcohol part.

I'm glad you can't take sleeping pills!!!! I did, and not just at night...and I drank...and I ended up in Emergency with an over dose...then on to detox which I never want to go through again!

Please feel free to pm me ANYTIME !!! And that bit about you being too young to "have this problem"...Hon, there are lots of younger men and women in the AA meetings I attend and alot more young men and women in the NA meetings. Ann, you are NOT alone. Reach out to your Heavenly Father...He loves you and accepts you right where you are right now!!!

With s & s,
Wendy

 

[ANN2626]

Dearest Ann,

First off...you are NOT horrible daughter and NOT a horrible person. You are a woman who made some wrong choices and wants to change!

I also was brought up in a "good Christian" home. Talk about rebel...some say I wrote the book on rebeling! Our parents raise us the best they know how...we then come to an age where we have to make our own decisions.

I'm sitting here...having a cigarette and drinking a glass of water...(been alcohol free for 25 days ) Don't worry about quitting both at the same time (booze and smokes), even my doc, who is a great man of God, said to work on the "smoke" part when I get more stable with the non alcohol part.

I'm glad you can't take sleeping pills!!!! I did, and not just at night...and I drank...and I ended up in Emergency with an over dose...then on to detox which I never want to go through again!

Please feel free to pm me ANYTIME !!! And that bit about you being too young to "have this problem"...Hon, there are lots of younger men and women in the AA meetings I attend and alot more young men and women in the NA meetings. Ann, you are NOT alone. Reach out to your Heavenly Father...He loves you and accepts you right where you are right now!!!

With s & s,
Wendy

thanks, that made me feel a lot better. im still not alcohol free though. drank last night with friends, but it made me feel better knowing i wasnt alone. i wasnt going to drink either but they wanted to hang out for my bday since ill be out of town so i said why not.
hopefully things just get better and i can put down the bottle. i think i need to just keep myself occupied. when im bored and done with everything for the day i just wanna drink.
thanks

 

[PrairieGurl]

thanks, that made me feel a lot better. im still not alcohol free though. drank last night with friends, but it made me feel better knowing i wasnt alone. i wasnt going to drink either but they wanted to hang out for my bday since ill be out of town so i said why not.
hopefully things just get better and i can put down the bottle. i think i need to just keep myself occupied. when im bored and done with everything for the day i just wanna drink.
thanks

Dear Ann,

Things WILL get better!!! Please keep posting so we know "where you are at" and can pray for you and encourage you!

One day at a time Ann!

Wendy

 

[Ruth~]

Ann, I think it is a good idea to keep busy doing other things, you may drink out of loneliness and boredom like I did. I didn't even want to quit when I quit but the doctor ordered me on Campral to take away the urge to drink. I don't need to drink being on other medications, you see. I wish you good luck with everything.