When I got saved I was trying to understand who God was. I really did not have any revelation on who He was. I came to Him because I had ran out of all other options. I knew life had more than what was being showed to me in the natural. But because of past pain I had thought God had given up on me. So I used to say "I give up on you. God you don't exist." (I am so thankful that we serve a merciful, understanding, and loving God.)
Well I was seeking truth and at the same time denying God's existence, see if that one doesnt mess up someone's ability to determine the truth.
I had searched in many different religions and faiths, philosophies, knowledge, science, psychology, drugs, alcohol, modeling people in books, or tv, or even others that I knew. For the record I was a little, no a lot messed up at the time.
Well at the end of my rope, I called out and said Lord you are going to show me you exist or i am going to check out of this world. I realized that in order for me to see that He existed I needed to step out on faith and believe He existed. So I believed, confessed and got baptised. I could go on in greater detail the circumstances that took place but it is not for this post for me to do that in.
In my search for who God was, When I was first starting my walk I, at the time, only would attend church periodically, and I did read the word regulary, I tried to reason out the word with my own wordly understanding and reasoning. But The Lord in His infinite mercy wanted to show me beyond a shadow of a doubt that He existed, was real and that He loved me.
How did He do this you may ask. Well He put me through a trial. He put me in a trial that was so great that I had only Him to rely upon. When the trial first came about I hit my face and cried out hard core for 2 hours straight. I then shut up and listened for Him if any thought came to me that was my own I would quiet it and listen. ( My many years of Martial arts training taught me how to quiet my mind)
Then I heard a voice a clear as I was speaking it my self and the voice said to me "Perservere". In my arrogance and immaturety. I got up off my knees and said "that's it, that's all youv'e got to tell me, I have been here for 2 hours." God is so awesome he still loves us even though we are ignorant, arrogant, and unthankful for His way. ( I think God probably laughed at my reply, A fatherly lovingly, I know things that you don't know kind of laugh)
That trial led me to need Him more which as I leaned upon Him more, I realized my need turned into want as well. Which has since turned into just a complete desire to be in His presence, and in His love.
Anyway In my trial I made it part of my prayer life to have God surround me with people that would teach me more about who He is. I had been reading the scriptures fervantly but I didn't understand everything that I was reading.
A friend had shared with me a couple of months prior a tape series of Joyce Meyer's Grace, Grace and more Grace. I must have listened to that series over 30 times. It was a real blessing.
One day I was walking out of Church and I said "all right Lord I am yours, what ever you want me to do, whereever you want me to go, I'll do it." I got this strong impression almost a voice say " O.K. Go left.", I started walking down the road walking left. I said alright Lord I think I hear you telling me to walk left so I am going to walk left.
I walked a ways and I said again. "Lord wherever you want me to go whatever you want me to do." He said "Ok Go into The Marina Cafe. " I said, I think that I hear you saying to go into the Marina Cafe I am giong to go into the Marina Cafe."
I need to digress for a moment here. The trial that I was going through, one of the many circumstances that evolved was that I lost my Job and was out of work for over a year, you want to talk about a testimony of how God supplies your needs try not working for over a year and still getting your bills met just in the nick of time every time and have no idea how it's going to happen, without asking for handouts."
When I walked into the cafe I had 2 dollars to my name and no clue why I was there.
I sat down at the counter. There was 2 people at the counter and 2 people at a seat, the waitress and the cook. Normaly on a sunday afternoon this place is packed.
I sat down at the counter and the waitress brought me a menu. I didn't know why I was there yet so I looked at the menu, while she talking to the other people at the counter.
I sat there thnking well I guess I will just order a lemonade or some french fries while I wait. And the Lord said to me, " Order what you want." I said Lord I only got 2 dollars, I heard him say agian "order what you want". My mind was started to race now and I found myself thinking, in a very hurried deer caught in the headlights kind of way, how can I order what I want if I don't have the money.
Keep in mind this is all internal dialogue at this point because I didn't want anyone to think I was crazy. But I finally said, Ok Lord I said I'm so I'm yours and I am going to order what I want!"
I ordered a chicken burger and french fries and a tea. I placed the order and immedietly my mind started racing. All I could think was I was in so much trouble, every dish washing scenerio that I had ever heard of was flashing through my mind or perhaps even worse, I would get arrrested for this.
As I was wrestling with these thoughts. I heard the waitress talking to the people at the counter. She was describing these rashes that her son had on his arm. As she was describing it, I said " Tea Tree oil," She turned to me said "What?" I said Tea Tree oil or Witch Hazel that will take care of it. She looked at me and asked" How do you know that."
I told her that I study and teach nutritional and alternative healing. She starts to tell me about her sons and she says that the oldest is 4 years old, his brother is 3 yrs old, they have been diagnosed with ADHD and the doctors have these kids on Ritalin.
After giving a her a completely exasperated look due to what the doctors were doing to her children, I start telling her about the different children that I have gotten off Ritalin through Nutritional Supplementation. I start teaching her about Calcium and Magnesium and what effects it has on the brain, I start teaching her and Vitamin C and it's effects and I tell Her about Grape Seed extract.
All of a sudden, from the couple of people at the table accross the room I hear " Preach On Brother." I look over at the gentleman that spoke this to me and the thought crosses my mind " Ooooookaaaaaay that was weird but,............. Ok". I turn back to the waitress and continue to talk to her a little more then she hears the bell ding for her to get me my order.
When she brings me my food I pick it up and walk over to the gentleman who spoke. He looks at me and says, " Your a Christian." I replied "Yes Sir".
He then asks, "do you know how I know that?" I said, "No Sir." He then says, " Do you want to know how I know that." I said "Yes sir." He then tells me," Because you, Love, Honor, and Respect, yourself and you Love, Honor and Respect others. And this is what a true Christian is and does."
I thanked him and introduced myself. He had the bible there with him and he starts reading out of it. He starts teaching on scriptures that I had read but had not gotten any revelation on. (Answering my prayer of Lord surround me with people to learn about you) He then asks me why does God bless us. I said because He loves us, because we are His children." The man smiled and said "that is true but that is not the truth. God bless's us so that we can bless others how can we say that we are blessed if we are not out blessing others.
Now I know from the time I picked up my food and went to speak with this man nor the entire time that I sat there and learned what he was teaching did it ever show on my countenance that I did not have the money to pay for my meal. But when the waitress brought my bill, to the table that I was sharing with this gentleman, before the bill ever touched the table this man snatched it up and paid for my food.
This man is an evangelist out of North Carolina that I have become good friends with.
The lesson I learned that day about blessing others was later hit home from a teaching tape series that Joyce Meyer teaches on The School of Obdience and How to be Outrageously and Radically Blessed. I learned a tremendous amount from the ministry of Joyce Meyer and The Lord answering my prayer of surrounding me with people I needed to learn more about Him.
But the Lord has in the past few years taught me that I have leaned on other's teaching too much. He is teaching me that some things that I beleive about what is in the Word that are not backed up by me searching it out in the scriptures, they are beliefs based upon what another man has taught and some were not scriptural at all.
So I am not in anyway trying to diminish Joyce Meyer's ministry or her annoiting but I have learned and I am learning that I must get my teachings from the Holy Spirit and the Word. And I must be ale to discuss and debate with someone who is teaching something and not just listen to a TV or a video or even Listen to a tape series. Because it is very easy to take on someone else's teaching in that way and it perhaps may not be scriptural.
May the God of all peace bring you life and more abundantly may you filled with the Joy of His salvation and may His truth, love, and mercy be plumb by which we live our life.
Raygn
Well I was seeking truth and at the same time denying God's existence, see if that one doesnt mess up someone's ability to determine the truth.
I had searched in many different religions and faiths, philosophies, knowledge, science, psychology, drugs, alcohol, modeling people in books, or tv, or even others that I knew. For the record I was a little, no a lot messed up at the time.
Well at the end of my rope, I called out and said Lord you are going to show me you exist or i am going to check out of this world. I realized that in order for me to see that He existed I needed to step out on faith and believe He existed. So I believed, confessed and got baptised. I could go on in greater detail the circumstances that took place but it is not for this post for me to do that in.
In my search for who God was, When I was first starting my walk I, at the time, only would attend church periodically, and I did read the word regulary, I tried to reason out the word with my own wordly understanding and reasoning. But The Lord in His infinite mercy wanted to show me beyond a shadow of a doubt that He existed, was real and that He loved me.
How did He do this you may ask. Well He put me through a trial. He put me in a trial that was so great that I had only Him to rely upon. When the trial first came about I hit my face and cried out hard core for 2 hours straight. I then shut up and listened for Him if any thought came to me that was my own I would quiet it and listen. ( My many years of Martial arts training taught me how to quiet my mind)
Then I heard a voice a clear as I was speaking it my self and the voice said to me "Perservere". In my arrogance and immaturety. I got up off my knees and said "that's it, that's all youv'e got to tell me, I have been here for 2 hours." God is so awesome he still loves us even though we are ignorant, arrogant, and unthankful for His way. ( I think God probably laughed at my reply, A fatherly lovingly, I know things that you don't know kind of laugh)
That trial led me to need Him more which as I leaned upon Him more, I realized my need turned into want as well. Which has since turned into just a complete desire to be in His presence, and in His love.
Anyway In my trial I made it part of my prayer life to have God surround me with people that would teach me more about who He is. I had been reading the scriptures fervantly but I didn't understand everything that I was reading.
A friend had shared with me a couple of months prior a tape series of Joyce Meyer's Grace, Grace and more Grace. I must have listened to that series over 30 times. It was a real blessing.
One day I was walking out of Church and I said "all right Lord I am yours, what ever you want me to do, whereever you want me to go, I'll do it." I got this strong impression almost a voice say " O.K. Go left.", I started walking down the road walking left. I said alright Lord I think I hear you telling me to walk left so I am going to walk left.
I walked a ways and I said again. "Lord wherever you want me to go whatever you want me to do." He said "Ok Go into The Marina Cafe. " I said, I think that I hear you saying to go into the Marina Cafe I am giong to go into the Marina Cafe."
I need to digress for a moment here. The trial that I was going through, one of the many circumstances that evolved was that I lost my Job and was out of work for over a year, you want to talk about a testimony of how God supplies your needs try not working for over a year and still getting your bills met just in the nick of time every time and have no idea how it's going to happen, without asking for handouts."
When I walked into the cafe I had 2 dollars to my name and no clue why I was there.
I sat down at the counter. There was 2 people at the counter and 2 people at a seat, the waitress and the cook. Normaly on a sunday afternoon this place is packed.
I sat down at the counter and the waitress brought me a menu. I didn't know why I was there yet so I looked at the menu, while she talking to the other people at the counter.
I sat there thnking well I guess I will just order a lemonade or some french fries while I wait. And the Lord said to me, " Order what you want." I said Lord I only got 2 dollars, I heard him say agian "order what you want". My mind was started to race now and I found myself thinking, in a very hurried deer caught in the headlights kind of way, how can I order what I want if I don't have the money.
Keep in mind this is all internal dialogue at this point because I didn't want anyone to think I was crazy. But I finally said, Ok Lord I said I'm so I'm yours and I am going to order what I want!"
I ordered a chicken burger and french fries and a tea. I placed the order and immedietly my mind started racing. All I could think was I was in so much trouble, every dish washing scenerio that I had ever heard of was flashing through my mind or perhaps even worse, I would get arrrested for this.
As I was wrestling with these thoughts. I heard the waitress talking to the people at the counter. She was describing these rashes that her son had on his arm. As she was describing it, I said " Tea Tree oil," She turned to me said "What?" I said Tea Tree oil or Witch Hazel that will take care of it. She looked at me and asked" How do you know that."
I told her that I study and teach nutritional and alternative healing. She starts to tell me about her sons and she says that the oldest is 4 years old, his brother is 3 yrs old, they have been diagnosed with ADHD and the doctors have these kids on Ritalin.
After giving a her a completely exasperated look due to what the doctors were doing to her children, I start telling her about the different children that I have gotten off Ritalin through Nutritional Supplementation. I start teaching her about Calcium and Magnesium and what effects it has on the brain, I start teaching her and Vitamin C and it's effects and I tell Her about Grape Seed extract.
All of a sudden, from the couple of people at the table accross the room I hear " Preach On Brother." I look over at the gentleman that spoke this to me and the thought crosses my mind " Ooooookaaaaaay that was weird but,............. Ok". I turn back to the waitress and continue to talk to her a little more then she hears the bell ding for her to get me my order.
When she brings me my food I pick it up and walk over to the gentleman who spoke. He looks at me and says, " Your a Christian." I replied "Yes Sir".
He then asks, "do you know how I know that?" I said, "No Sir." He then says, " Do you want to know how I know that." I said "Yes sir." He then tells me," Because you, Love, Honor, and Respect, yourself and you Love, Honor and Respect others. And this is what a true Christian is and does."
I thanked him and introduced myself. He had the bible there with him and he starts reading out of it. He starts teaching on scriptures that I had read but had not gotten any revelation on. (Answering my prayer of Lord surround me with people to learn about you) He then asks me why does God bless us. I said because He loves us, because we are His children." The man smiled and said "that is true but that is not the truth. God bless's us so that we can bless others how can we say that we are blessed if we are not out blessing others.
Now I know from the time I picked up my food and went to speak with this man nor the entire time that I sat there and learned what he was teaching did it ever show on my countenance that I did not have the money to pay for my meal. But when the waitress brought my bill, to the table that I was sharing with this gentleman, before the bill ever touched the table this man snatched it up and paid for my food.
This man is an evangelist out of North Carolina that I have become good friends with.
The lesson I learned that day about blessing others was later hit home from a teaching tape series that Joyce Meyer teaches on The School of Obdience and How to be Outrageously and Radically Blessed. I learned a tremendous amount from the ministry of Joyce Meyer and The Lord answering my prayer of surrounding me with people I needed to learn more about Him.
But the Lord has in the past few years taught me that I have leaned on other's teaching too much. He is teaching me that some things that I beleive about what is in the Word that are not backed up by me searching it out in the scriptures, they are beliefs based upon what another man has taught and some were not scriptural at all.
So I am not in anyway trying to diminish Joyce Meyer's ministry or her annoiting but I have learned and I am learning that I must get my teachings from the Holy Spirit and the Word. And I must be ale to discuss and debate with someone who is teaching something and not just listen to a TV or a video or even Listen to a tape series. Because it is very easy to take on someone else's teaching in that way and it perhaps may not be scriptural.
May the God of all peace bring you life and more abundantly may you filled with the Joy of His salvation and may His truth, love, and mercy be plumb by which we live our life.
Raygn
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