im having a big big problem and i might loose a girl i love because of it and i dont know how to go about not being jealous and i have bit of a lust problem but that isnt towards her though...what to do???...
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Jealousy
- Thread starter jesusfreak34988
- Start date
Well, you know what the word says right?These emotions don't belong in a Christians mind.Only Christ does.Go to the Father and plead with Him.Tell him your situation.He's your Father, he'll help.All of us know suffering on some level.All of us know sin.And plainly said thats what it is.My brother, satan is loose.We all know this.Christ has come to give us victory through Him.I had to learn and still am that in times similar or just like yours we draw close to God.jesusfreak34988 said:
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Jealousy is basically a mirror. Jealousy comes from oneself, not the person targeted by it. I mean, if you're jealous over someone having something, it's because you're unable to feel happy for them. Instead you focus only on yourself, and you become unhappy for not having what other people have.
Jealousy in a relationship is different though. I'd say the most important thing to do is to figure out if it's unfounded or not. Is your girlfriend known for cheating? Do you have any TANGIBLE reason to not trust her commitment? If those don't exist, then it's likely a mirror again. But this time it's low self-esteem that's causing it, instead of self-centredness. You believe you don't have what it takes to keep her, which leads to jealousy and suspicion.
There are, of course, other reasons for jealousy, it's possible none of the above fits your situation. Pray to God for a clear vision, one not tainted by the flesh and lies. Remember that you can't stop being jealous without the help of God, you need His help to beat it.
The same goes for the lust issues. Pray to God for strength, and rebuke the thoughts when they emerge. Don't entertain them, try to shoot them down immediately. Just don't forget that at your age those thoughts are quite normal, so no need to beat yourself up over them. Just don't let them control you.
Jealousy in a relationship is different though. I'd say the most important thing to do is to figure out if it's unfounded or not. Is your girlfriend known for cheating? Do you have any TANGIBLE reason to not trust her commitment? If those don't exist, then it's likely a mirror again. But this time it's low self-esteem that's causing it, instead of self-centredness. You believe you don't have what it takes to keep her, which leads to jealousy and suspicion.
There are, of course, other reasons for jealousy, it's possible none of the above fits your situation. Pray to God for a clear vision, one not tainted by the flesh and lies. Remember that you can't stop being jealous without the help of God, you need His help to beat it.
The same goes for the lust issues. Pray to God for strength, and rebuke the thoughts when they emerge. Don't entertain them, try to shoot them down immediately. Just don't forget that at your age those thoughts are quite normal, so no need to beat yourself up over them. Just don't let them control you.
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nowhereville
Senior Member
Jealousy is a horrible emotion. I had never been the least bit jealous until I discovered several alarming things about my long term marriage.
I think part of it is what your focus is - is it God or the other person?
I had reason to be mistrustful, however, I should have focused on God and known that a) God had my back, b) God can reveal anything c) God knows my heart and he is the lover of my soul - he care for me and quite a few other things - however - I choose to focus completely on what my spouse was doing and who he had become - which by the way is also miserable because then you have no hope.
Just some food for thought.
I think part of it is what your focus is - is it God or the other person?
I had reason to be mistrustful, however, I should have focused on God and known that a) God had my back, b) God can reveal anything c) God knows my heart and he is the lover of my soul - he care for me and quite a few other things - however - I choose to focus completely on what my spouse was doing and who he had become - which by the way is also miserable because then you have no hope.
Just some food for thought.
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jesusfreak34988 said:
First off, what is causing your jealousy? This needs to be answered first. Is it something your girlfriend does? If so, what? Can you list a few things that she does that makes you jealous?
My point in this is: Some jealous is there for a reason, while other is not. First you need to see if it is good or if it is bad.
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no it was just she would talk to the guys in the cb but there is no reason for me to be that way and sop im changing !!!
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homeschooling_Momma
Active Member
first of all, you are so young and its so easy to be 'unfamiliar' with how relationships work...and how to feel about things....
please look inside yourself and see what you see there....are you perhaps jelious because you worry what you would do in a situation???
I know that I have had my issues because I have been cheated on before, and I know that its no excuse, but when youve been shell shocked before, its hard to remember that this particular person isnt the one that hurt us.
I would talk with my Pastor/trusted older adult in person face to face about this issue...and I would also talk with my girfriend about how these things made me feel...maybe even incude yourself in her conversations to make friends yourself may help.....
if you feel the need, also talk with a relationship expert and maybe even get couple counseling.
Prayer works friend....keep looking up God is giving you answers.....
I am praying for you my young friend.
please look inside yourself and see what you see there....are you perhaps jelious because you worry what you would do in a situation???
I know that I have had my issues because I have been cheated on before, and I know that its no excuse, but when youve been shell shocked before, its hard to remember that this particular person isnt the one that hurt us.
I would talk with my Pastor/trusted older adult in person face to face about this issue...and I would also talk with my girfriend about how these things made me feel...maybe even incude yourself in her conversations to make friends yourself may help.....
if you feel the need, also talk with a relationship expert and maybe even get couple counseling.
Prayer works friend....keep looking up God is giving you answers.....
I am praying for you my young friend.
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hey she lives over 500 miles away from me and well im pretty ok now on the whole thnig but all the hel i get is very Appreciated
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when you give in to Gods way and not your way and humble yourself to God ..all this jealousy stuff will disappear.When you walk in the spirit and not the flesh.....Don't let your emotions control you, instead get a grip on emotions and control your emotions.It takes practice and self control to learn this and total surrender yourself to God and depend on God.
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