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Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
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CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
I
Inperfected
Guest
MMM... it's ok, it is normal to be jealous, but in the same way, be happy that you got this extra time without martial stresses 
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Glorianna
I'm a proud Canadian who married an American!
Inperfected said:MMM... it's ok, it is normal to be jealous, but in the same way, be happy that you got this extra time without martial stresses
You have a good point there. But when you're in a long distance relationship, all you want is to be near your SO.
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flounder7786
Guest
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN!!! and then you see all these couples around you, and it drives you UP the WALL cause all you want to do is have your SO there...i know the LD is worth it, but i think until you get yourself into a LD relationship...you cant relate...you know what i mean?Glorianna said:
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MagicStar723
Well-Known Member
hmmm can I join the club? My bf and I know it's God's will, we are just impatient for His time! (and we are broke )
)
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Glorianna
I'm a proud Canadian who married an American!
flounder7786 said:
SO very true! I had no idea what it was like until I first started dating Clay. I thought I could imagine what it was like, but I really had no idea.
MagicStar723 said:
You are impatient for God's time in what? But sure, you can join the club!
The more, the merrier!
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I
InTheFlame
Guest
I don't mean to be picky/nasty, but that's actually envy you're feeling, rather than jealousy. You want one thing that someone else has, without the rest of their life
I know the feeling... all I can say is, try to feel satisfaction in building a healthy relationship in order to get your marriage off to a good start... because after you're married and the longings are gone (because they've been fulfilled), you don't want to be looking back wishing you'd been less hasty.
Here's how I see it (try to work with me on the metaphor! It's very new and not very thought out) - building a relationship is like building a house.
The initial friendship/dating period is the foundation. Without a firm foundation, the house will be unstable and fall down easily. This is where you set initial boundaries - who you represent yourself as being, what you'll put up with, etc
The bf/gf stage is building the walls. Without the walls, strong winds will cause havoc. Cold will come in between you. Heat will inflame you. This is where you learn to communicate openly and honestly, and to care for & protect each other, banding together in pain rather than blaming each other.
The engagement period is putting on the roof. The roof protects and keeps off the rain. This is where you discuss problems which could arise in marriage and how to deal with them, make sure your expectations of marriage are talked about and understood, and where you plan your lives together.
Marriage... is the housewarming party
If any of these steps are skimped on, they need to be returned to and redone, otherwise the house will collapse too quickly... no point putting extra tiles on the roof when the foundation is the problem... and each step is very important to the overall 'house'....
Hrmmmm... did that help any?
I know the feeling... all I can say is, try to feel satisfaction in building a healthy relationship in order to get your marriage off to a good start... because after you're married and the longings are gone (because they've been fulfilled), you don't want to be looking back wishing you'd been less hasty.
Here's how I see it (try to work with me on the metaphor! It's very new and not very thought out) - building a relationship is like building a house.
The initial friendship/dating period is the foundation. Without a firm foundation, the house will be unstable and fall down easily. This is where you set initial boundaries - who you represent yourself as being, what you'll put up with, etc
The bf/gf stage is building the walls. Without the walls, strong winds will cause havoc. Cold will come in between you. Heat will inflame you. This is where you learn to communicate openly and honestly, and to care for & protect each other, banding together in pain rather than blaming each other.
The engagement period is putting on the roof. The roof protects and keeps off the rain. This is where you discuss problems which could arise in marriage and how to deal with them, make sure your expectations of marriage are talked about and understood, and where you plan your lives together.
Marriage... is the housewarming party
If any of these steps are skimped on, they need to be returned to and redone, otherwise the house will collapse too quickly... no point putting extra tiles on the roof when the foundation is the problem... and each step is very important to the overall 'house'....
Hrmmmm... did that help any?
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flounder7786
Guest
wow...i really enjoyed that!!! thanks for posting that...TWO THUMBS UP FROM FLOUNDER!!!!
thanks for posting that...TWO THUMBS UP FROM FLOUNDER!!!!
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flounder7786
Guest
Women are totally wired differently then men, i think there are a select few that can remain single, but because women are soo...dare i say...emotional, i think it puts a huge amout of pressure on them to get married, and to desire marriage!!!Tenken said:
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I
InTheFlame
Guest
I'd disagree that women have any more needs that 'only their spouse can fulfil' than men do.... altho women tend to be told a lot more by society that having the affection of a man is important in their worth to society...Glorianna said:
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ChristianRocks
Christ lives in me and I in Him.
Glorianna said:
Actually, my dear, God is the only one who can truly fulfill the intimacy desires within your heart. No one else can satisfy this unquenchable thirst that you have, not even a dreamy husband. Remember when Jesus spoke to the Samaritan women at the well, she had been married 5 times and was still not satisfied--Jesus saw her heart, which desired intimacy just like yours. Jesus said the only way to truly satisfiy her thirst within was to drink of His Living Water. So if you are looking at marriage as a way for fullfillment in the intimacy department, my dear, I think you need to relook at some of your motivations for marrying. As much as I'd love for it to be so, I could never fully satisfy my spouse even if I wanted to. Because I am only human, and man cannot impart life. Only God can. The Samaritan women at the well was the same way. She was drinking from the wrong wells. And Jesus saw this.
Even as a christian, I've found myself drinking from the wrong wells trying to find something that would fulfill that longing within for intimacy (Yes, guys desire intimacy just as much as girls). And all along I just needed to stop magnifying the wrong wells and instead focus on drinking the Living Water of Christ, so that my desire for intimacy could be satisfied, even outside of marriage, go figure. I found that the water is in the Word of God. And drinking comes by listening. The Bible is our source of true refreshment and quenching of our thirst. Never forget that!
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