its not easy being single

[lookingforyou]

i didnt know what to post here. There are so many things that i want to say, so i decided to put them one by one but not all of them in once, that would be long and maybe boring at the same time.
Well, for me being single is not easy, because i wish so hard in my heart and I pray to God that please send me the man who wants Him for me. I am 27 years and i never had a serius relationship, not because i am not a serius girl. I am very christian and funny and i have so much love to give i dont know why i am single, i feel so alone and i miss so much to have a boyrfriend or a husbund to love. For me its hard, maybe for others is not, but for me it is because i want a friend, a partner, a lover , a person to love, to go everywhere and have fun, i dont have any of that. I am sure that there are others that feel the same, so writte back and share ur experiences, maybe who knowsss and maybe we could meet here that special person that we are all looking and waiting, so i invite you to pray now for all of us that want to know that person that God wants for us I will start: Dear God, thanks for all the things that You give us, the good ones and the bad ones, we will try to learn in both situations, please God send us Your love and Bless us and show us the right way in this life and please for those who are singles like me, please send us our future partners: wifes or husbunds, please God we want to share our lives and make future families with strong christian values. Thanks God for giving us the chance to meet others by this modern way that is Internet, help us to give it a good use, specially to promote Your love and truth. Bless us always and we Love You our dear and sweet God.

 

[HypnoToad]

I pretty much feel the same way you do. I hate being single and not having anyone to share life with. Like God said, "it's not good for the man to be alone". Pretty much feels like having my guts ripped out day after day after day. Ditto on your prayer.

 

[indra_fanatic]

I know how you feel. I am 25 and most of my friends circle is married or heavily involved. I also have a number of characteristics making it virtually impossible for me to find anyone sharing, or able to tolerate, those attributes.

--I have zero interest in having biological children.
--My hobbies (being in the outdoors, hikes in remote desert areas) are not exactly conducive to most women.
--I am a lepidopterist. Few women want a man who is going to kill/pin/mount butterflies in front of them and whose bedroom is a veritable caterpillar farm.
--I am hyper-talkative and more conversationally intense, particularly on political and theological issues, than most women (or men for that matter) can handle.
--I'm borderline autistic and have a number of annoying quirks. I laugh at nothing at all (to the outsider). I jump and run around for no apparent reason, I get obsessed with a single topic for hours/days/weeks on end, and I often turn into a nervous puddle of mush around attractive women.

 

[foadle]

Something I have been learning recently is to look at my situation with all honesty.
Consider such questions as:
1. Why do you think you are single - your perceptions are often what shy people away.
2. Do I act single - often a single person will behave in a manner that is a turn of because they consider themselves second rate - I know I did

If you can get hold of it I strongly recommend you try and get some of Donna Crouch's teachings on this subject.

 

[filip2mp]

i strongly agree with foadle plenty a time people do not check themselves for any put offs and even when some do they worry more about those things than they work on those put offs. my pastor has been teaching on relationships EVERY sunday evening for about 6 months now it amazing how much ive learnt.
im planning to get the whole series for my frinds to listen

Something I have been learning recently is to look at my situation with all honesty.
Consider such questions as:
1. Why do you think you are single - your perceptions are often what shy people away.
2. Do I act single - often a single person will behave in a manner that is a turn of because they consider themselves second rate - I know I did

If you can get hold of it I strongly recommend you try and get some of Donna Crouch's teachings on this subject.

 

[JeremiahJ]

lookingforyou - What do you do to get yourself out there and meet single men?

 

[awesome liver]

i like being single. actually like. sometimes it's nice to share a bed, but at the end of the day, i just like having my own space because my time is hard to share what with school and all the extra curricular activities (like painting -- 30 hrs in the past four days).

 

[mwb]

I think it comes down to priorities (and a little luck). If you want to find someone, you have to make yourself available & attractive & interesting to others.

But at the same time, if you are in a position in life where other things have priority & other than feeling alone now & then, you really don't have the time or the energy then you should focus on those issues.

I remember way back when I was 27, I was a few years out of college & didn't have much money plus I was giving my parents some financial assistance. I felt like finding someone was not a priority. Actually at that age I was more optomistic that tomorrow would possibly bring someone into my life.

 

[nathan82]

lookingforyou...amen. Please, please use paragraphs! It is much easier on the eyes.

I will share my current singlehood situation.

There is a girl I really like at my church. I asked her out about 2 weeks ago and subsequently was rejected. I was depressed for about a day, but I'm back to normal. Also, it wasn't a "you're not good enough for me" rejection, which leads me to this: I still like her. Possibly even more than before I got rejected. I feel I may have a chance. We still talk about what's going on in our lives and stuff so at least the awkwardness isn't there.

Did I mention I like her a lot? Like the past two weeks, during my morning prayers, I'm praying for her. Not even to like me, but just praying that she be a woman of God, wisdom for her tests, healing her past wounds, etc. I never would've thought.

Sorry to jack your thread, but I have a question...if there's a girl who draws me closer to God, rely and communicate with Him more...is that a good thing? I'm unsure at the moment b/c I don't know if a girl should motivate me to be more Christ-like, but should be my own desire to know God.

 

[mwb]

Generally speaking, I would say yes to your answer.

I think it can be a good thing when someone makes you a better person.

It's also great when we can take rejection & turn it into something positive. Unfortunately emotions usually take over & rejection is not easy to handle. But every now & then we can be rejected & still be able to face the person & even wish them all the best.