It took me a lot of time to pray about an intrusive thought

[Kostilaks]

I got an intrusive thought yesterday. It was scary but I was out with friends and carefree, so I ignored it the first seconds.

After some seconds, I started worrying that I should pray about that scary, intrusive thought.

Ocd started bugging me that I should do a compulsion, perfectly, so my prayers can be heard.

Instead of praying at that second, for what i wanted, i started doing the compulsion first.

I remember having thoughts like " I better pray for what I want, because the compulsion may take time and then, i will worry if i was too late"

I do not remember if at that second, I prayed about what was bugging me. I remember having some 1second prayers but i do not remember how much time has passed since the intrusve thought was made. And i just did not feel right with these 1second prayers. i was not putting my heart to them, because I wanted to do the compulsion first.

A lot of time passed and the compulsion was not done. so, i realised that a lot of time passed since the intrusive thought, and I prayed again that they were intrusive thougnts and they are not valid.

I worry because, perhaps, I should have prayed about it, much earlier. as soon as the intrusive thought, started bugging me i should have prayed about it.

I remember praying about it very fast but I do not remember how much time had passed. it could have been 40 seconds after the intrusive thought but it could be more. the problem is that i cant remember.

I am worried because the intrusive thought was scary and I, just, ignored it while being carefree.

 

[Kostilaks]

I was out with friends and carefree. Suddenly, an intrusive thought popped up and I ignored it because i was being normal and carefree. Suddenly, I started worrying about this thought. I worried if it was accepted by Gods just because i was carefree.

I could not pray as i wanted because I was being busy with my friends. I tried to pray with my thoughts and i think I did, but I just did not feel it was enought. it was just 1second prayers.

I worry if I should have been more specific and should have prayed longer and earlier.

I do not know how much seconds or minutes passed since the intrusive thought popped up. I worry if i was late to pray about it and it was considered by Gods valid.

I could not pray as i wanted because my friends kept talking to me. I fast prayed with my thoughts but i do not know if they were heard. and i do not know how much time had passed since the intrusive thought

I worry if I should have prayed about my intrusive thought, earlier and longer.

 

[ChristianGirl_96]

Have you considered counselling or not?

 

[Gkst]

God will forgive you. God understand your story and it just a thought. He knows your OCD and he knows sometimes we can not choose a thought. You can pray to him, and just move on. God won't blame you on your OCD intrusive thought that you don't want to think. You don't need to worry about it, God will forgive you.

 

[Tolworth John]

worry if I should have prayed about my intrusive thought, earlier and longer.

I wonder if you pay any attention to the replies you get.

Again stop what you are doing and find and read the 25 tips for successfully dealing with ice treatment.

It tells you not to fight intrusive thoughts and give lots of other helpful and practical advice.

One of which is.

You are responsible for the treatment of your OCD.

So find out what You can do to help yourself.

 

[Not Perfect]

I am neither a pastor nor a counselor, but I am an OCD sufferer who is pretty familiar with what both groups say about these types of thoughts.

Most people deal with unwanted intrusive thoughts. Some of these thoughts are formed by habit; for example, if I think of the same thing a lot (perhaps a subject that I am studying in school), I may think about it randomly during the day for no reason. Others are simply mental "noise"; we can't explain exactly where they come from and can't stop them from happening. Most people get bizarre thoughts from time to time. Nearly everyone has had weird urges or thoughts that they don't mean. For example, most people have experienced being on a high place, and they get a sudden urge to jump. Does this mean they actually want to jump, or are secretly suicidal? No, it's just a weird impulse; a brain response to the healthy and rational fear of falling that most of us have.

Likewise, a lot of "bad thoughts" cannot be controlled. They are not necessarily sin. If I were to say, "don't think of a pink bear", a pink bear will pop into your head, and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it. If I say, "it's wrong to say bad words", chances are a cuss word will come into your head. If a man sees a beautiful woman, his mind automatically notices her physical attributes, often before he consciously realizes it. In each case, you don't think the thoughts willingly, but they come into your head nonetheless. Other times, a thought that you don't like comes seemingly out of nowhere; it's as thought your neurons are firing randomly like they do in a dream. It's just mental background noise. Your brain, which is responsible for your senses, automatic movements, and which comes up with automatic thoughts, is not the same as your mind. Your mind is the conscious and self-aware part of you, that has self control and is responsible for deliberate and complex thoughts. It's basically your soul or your "self". Your brain is not you. While you do not have control over all of the thoughts your brain comes up with, you (or if you will, your mind) decide whether to entertain those thoughts and dwell on them.

I believe God knows this. The brain is part of the body, and like the rest of the physical things in this world, it is corrupted by the Fall. That is why Paul does not say to repent for every thought, or pray for every thought, but to "take every thought captive". That is, we are to critically examine the thoughts that come into our heads, consciously dwell on the good ones and choose not to entertain the bad ones. That is also why OCD experts say that rushing to pray over every thought is a bad thing. Dwelling on thoughts only makes them stronger. By giving a quick, 1-second acknowledgement that the thought was bad, you did exactly the right thing. If you dwell on it too much, it will just make you think it more. By praying about it over and over again, you are engaging in "meaningless repetitions", not trusting God to forgive you, and likely making the thoughts more likely to happen in the future. On the other hand, by quickly recognizing that the thought was bad, and moving on, you are actually showing repentance. Repentance is not feeling sorry and punishing yourself. It is changing your ways. By ignoring the thought, you are repenting, by changing your thought patterns and trying not to think about it any more.

Here's a technique from Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz that might help you. He's one of the world's leading experts on OCD treatment, and also a devout Christian. This technique has helped me a lot. When you have a bad thought, try not to pray about it for 15 minutes. If you pray about it right away, you will just feel anxious and get into a cycle of feverishly praying but not feeling any better. If you wait 15 minutes, your anxiety will diminish, and you can think about the thought more rationally, and have more presence of mind as you pray. Trust me, it's hard and super anxiety-inducing, but if you do it consistently, it really does help.

Finally, a huge key to getting over these compulsions is to understand that forgiveness of your sins relies on God, not on you. Remember the thief on the cross. He didn't pray after every sin he committed. Yet, at the very end of his life, right before he died, he repented and asked Jesus to forgive him. And that was all it took. If you don't repent right away, you can do so right now. Until you die, there is no expiration date on God's forgiveness. Likewise, it does not matter how long you pray for forgiveness. The thief didn't beg or plead or say the sinner's prayer 15 times. He said only, "Lord, remember me when you enter your kingdom". It is God's grace, through our faith, that saves us and allows us to be forgiven. Prayer changes us, not God. So, while we should sometimes spend much time in prayer, this is more for our benefit than for God's. Praying for a long time because you love God and want to get closer to him is good. Praying for a long time because you think you won't be forgiven is bad. If you pray for forgiveness once, and pray again because you are afraid the first one didn't "take", it actually shows a lack of faith. Is God to small or petty to forgive you the first time?

When you are tempted to pray needlessly over and over again, try saying the Lord's prayer. Say it just once, but really think actively about what you are saying. There's nothing better than a prayer prescribed directly by the Son of God. Simple, sincere, and to the point. It's almost childlike. Trust that when you say, "Forgive me my trespasses", that God will do it. It's easier said than done, but I believe you can do it.