Is there anyone there?

[anjelica]

Yes Stabat. That is exactly what we felt. We did in fact consider writing to the Vatican. Our bishop is away on holiday and will not be dealing with this issue until he returns from his holidays. I have no idea what his response is going to be and we are on our own dealing with these things for a few weeks until everybody returned from holidays.

 

[Winter]

Stay positive Anjelica. Things are changing slowly for the better. The Lord will not abandon you and He will make things better for you with the churches. I believe this.

 

[anjelica]

Winter thank you. I was thinking that myself also. I had felt very happy that even very small moves had been made in fact I was delirious with happiness. I felt released be myself again the self that is positive confident and happy and that can write once again. Then when I was made to think negatively began to destroy me again and I went through a very black few hours. However many things have happened to me today and I knew this morning what I had to do. This afternoon I began writing my book and I knew that God was saying to me that I am being allowed to remain blind so that others might see. I know that all of what has happened and is happening even though painful at times is for the glory of God and I accept it all for that reason. It is difficult to express this on the public forum but I am doing so because I want people to know that you can go through the most terrible things and the most dreadful darkness but still the light shines and however much we suffer and however much we may feel the pain the light is always there and that is why my book is called eternal light my journey into blindness. I want to grasp hold of the positive even in the midst of pain and turn everything into something beautiful for God.

 

[Winter]

Absolutely. Its the little moves that count. You hold on to them. That is what hope is all about. We can always hold on to hope in whatever circumstances we are in. I know that sounds too simplistic but its so true. I wrote about this in the depression forum. When you get the chance please read it here:

http://www.christianforums.com/threads/the-idea-of-hope.7952924/

Writing that book is a great thing to be doing.
There is hope. There is always hope.

Psalm 62: 6-9
My soul, be at rest in God alone,
from whom comes my hope.
God alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not fall.
My deliverance and honor are with God,
my strong rock; my refuge is with God.
Trust God at all times, my people!
Pour out your hearts to God our refuge!

 

[anjelica]

Thank you winter. I have written two books of poetry and my second one was actually called songs of hope. It is so easy sometimes to focus on the negative things that happen and for me even though the move made by father seems small to some, it thrilled my geart and Zi was deluriously happy. When you are disabled as badly as we are, you learn to accept even the tiniest of things with great joy.

I have something else to report as well because this morning we went to our old parish church once again and a new organ has arrived. It is very large and for now it has been placed right next to the place where my husband and I sit. A pew had been moved out for us as I think I told you and that place is now always hours but the priest at this church was very concerned that the placing of the organ might give us too small a space to fit our wheelchairs into. And so this morning when we arrived he saw us coming down the aisle and he came immediately to us and asked us if we had enough space. I laughed and made a joke saying we've got a companion father and it is very big. We all laughed together but he made sure that we were perfectly okay. So that is very good. This is the church that will now be predominantly the one that we go to.

 

[Anhelyna]

That's very positive Anjelica

 

[anjelica]

It is Anhelyna. Father and I had a big ding dong. I was in the right and he accepted that he had done wrong originally and he wants only to reconcile now. It is only the doors that are a problem now. That will take time to resolve.

 

[anjelica]

Regarding hope I would actually say that there are times when Hope is only in the life beyond. Sometimes in fact there IS no hope and there is more that I would like to say about that but will not do so right now. It could make for a very ling post lol

 

[Anhelyna]

One day the door problem will be solved - hopefully not too far off

 

[anjelica]

It will be solved Anhelyna but we tried of two years to solve it and nothing ever worked.but this time I think Father might be wanting to help more. Especially as we have written to the Bishop.

 

[anjelica]

Well, we went to Mass this morning at our old parish church, and as we were leaving I was going very very slowly in my wheelchair trying to navigate between the font at the back of the church, and the back pew. It is only a narrow space. So I HAD to go slowly. Bob had gone ahead of me in his wherkchair.

A lady came up behind me as I was trying to make my way to the ve ry back of the c hurch, feeling my way, and said, "Come on. Get a move on. You're holding everybody up." Hmmm! I said curtly, "You KNOW I am blind." And she does know!

 

[Anhelyna]

Some folk are just plain ignorant speaking in such a way.

Would it be wrong of me to hope that one day fairly soon she has a problem and has to learn how to deal with it without help ? Just a nastily fractured ankle making her non weight bearing for about 4 weeks would be a worthwhile lesson for her

 

[anjelica]

LOL Anhelyna. She HAS had that. Nyou must be psychic lol. And she was. Non. Weight bearing for a while and IS alone! It has not changd her though!

 

[Anhelyna]

Oh well - there's no accounting for some folk is there

 

[anjelica]

I know. I just have to be patient!

 

[Stabat Mater dolorosa]

I know. I just have to be patient!

You are a walking saint, I would've snapped a long time ago if I were treated the way you are.

 

[anjelica]

LOL Stabat. I am no saint!

 

[Stabat Mater dolorosa]

LOL Stabat. I am no saint!

You know that's probably what a real saint would be saying about herself.

I smell saint...

 

[anjelica]

He he. Well, the lady who was cross with me yesterday morning, at the end of Mass today, went and opened ALL FOUR sets of double doors for us as we went through. WOW.

 

[Anhelyna]

The Holy Spirit can and does work marvels