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Discussion and Debate
Discussion and Debate
Ethics & Morality
Is it wrong to refuse sex with someone you are married to?
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<blockquote data-quote="motherprayer" data-source="post: 62245489" data-attributes="member: 311688"><p>I think, at the end of the day, it is absolutely and unequivocally wrong for a spouse to withhold sex from his/her spouse. The marital relationship means doing things you don't feel like, and no I don't mean lay down and take it, but simply saying "How long has it been? I ought to give a bit of my time to satisfying my spouses physical desires."</p><p></p><p>I'm speaking as a woman who has NO sex drive at ALL, who is married to a man who has a huge drive. I don't even think about it, to be frank, and it IS a chore for me. But I do it, not out of duty, or fear that my husband will cheat if I don't, but out of a genuine desire to please him, physically, emotionally, and sexually.</p><p></p><p>I HATE it at times. I don't even know why, but I do. Part of it, I know, is physical, as I suffer from fibromyalgia, among other things. I really just don't want to. </p><p></p><p>Now, he and I have talked about this. We are open about the issues we face, both individually and as a unit. I told him how I feel, and as a result of that discussion, he learned to be PATIENT. It may not happen every day, or even every week, and he understands. So he may nudge me gently, or offer a sweet reminder of his physical needs, and I respond by giving him exactly what he asks for.</p><p></p><p>It is about respect between both parties, though. If he didn't communicate his needs - IN A LOVING WAY - and/or if I didn't communicate my issues - AGAIN, IN A LOVING WAY - we wouldn't have come to a good place about this. If we BOTH didn't make a consistent effort, him in understanding and me in conceding, our marriage WOULD have failed.</p><p></p><p>I pray this helps someone. I have been very open about a sensitive subject, because I do know how hard this is to go through.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="motherprayer, post: 62245489, member: 311688"] I think, at the end of the day, it is absolutely and unequivocally wrong for a spouse to withhold sex from his/her spouse. The marital relationship means doing things you don't feel like, and no I don't mean lay down and take it, but simply saying "How long has it been? I ought to give a bit of my time to satisfying my spouses physical desires." I'm speaking as a woman who has NO sex drive at ALL, who is married to a man who has a huge drive. I don't even think about it, to be frank, and it IS a chore for me. But I do it, not out of duty, or fear that my husband will cheat if I don't, but out of a genuine desire to please him, physically, emotionally, and sexually. I HATE it at times. I don't even know why, but I do. Part of it, I know, is physical, as I suffer from fibromyalgia, among other things. I really just don't want to. Now, he and I have talked about this. We are open about the issues we face, both individually and as a unit. I told him how I feel, and as a result of that discussion, he learned to be PATIENT. It may not happen every day, or even every week, and he understands. So he may nudge me gently, or offer a sweet reminder of his physical needs, and I respond by giving him exactly what he asks for. It is about respect between both parties, though. If he didn't communicate his needs - IN A LOVING WAY - and/or if I didn't communicate my issues - AGAIN, IN A LOVING WAY - we wouldn't have come to a good place about this. If we BOTH didn't make a consistent effort, him in understanding and me in conceding, our marriage WOULD have failed. I pray this helps someone. I have been very open about a sensitive subject, because I do know how hard this is to go through. [/QUOTE]
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Is it wrong to refuse sex with someone you are married to?
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