Is it really so bad?

[JillLars]

Thanks for the advice yitzchak, I know that we will be changing so much in the future, and since highschool we have both changed a lot (doesn't seem like 2 people can change that much in a couple years but we have) I was not a Christian when I met Josh, and I am now. We are also juggling full time jobs and full time school right now. My parents also divorced last spring which was very difficult on me, and in turn on our relationship. I look forward to a couple years to relax after we get married before we have kids. Our new jobs will be difficult at first, in fact we are facing some serious changes and possible financial difficulties in the near future with Josh needing to be out of work for an entire summer to complete his police training, and me needing to be off of work for 10 weeks to do my student teaching. I am sure that we will work something out though. We both love God very much, and we have promised ourselves to each other, to God, and have every intention of keeping that promise.

 

[TheFirstNoelle]

Jill:


My fiance is off at police training right now - for five and half months! So I guess we'll be in a similar boat It's been a month that he's been gone so far, andI'm going to fly out and spend a weekend with him on Friday - get him out of the barracks for a couple guys, and away from all that testoterone! It's definitely a relationship test.

 

[potopaj]

Coasties Post was Wonderful!!

During the past few months (while I've been planning my wedding) I've gotten a lot of advice for the first few years, and I will share the best peices with you!

~Don't give up, almost everything can be worked through

~Spend at least 30 minutes a day of "together time" don't take each other for granted!

~Keep little things up! (Love notes, surprise flowers, loving messages on the answering machine)

~Find a Hobby together (Learn something from scratch TOGETHER!)

These are things that people who have recently (and not so recently) been married have told me to take into consideration to make the first years better

I would add pray together regularly. On top of the 30 mins of together time.

Also remember, God did NOT create marriage for 2 people to be happy. He created marriage to have 2 people complete, and complement each other, and to make eachother holy. To make someone else holy you must sacrifice of yourself. look at the other person as Jesus did the Church. It was not a mistake that Christ draws parallels between marriage relationship and church relationships with God.

Sacrificing yourself to your spouse, ensuring you are doing so Biblicly leads to joy. (different from happiness) can lead to happiness.

Also don't give yourself an out. If you entertain divorce, or start to what if, you have opened yourself up to many falsehoods. In marriage there should be only one option, staying with it. There are a few exeptions, but even then it is more adventatious to work it out.

Also something that is not brought into the arena much is the fact that we're directed to forgive as Christ forgives. I am SOOOO comforted that there is nothing my Father in heaven will not forgive me for. I need to project that on my wife. It makes me feel more secure with my Lord, and with my wife knowing this.