Is it okay to want to look pretty?

[Lovethisjourney]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

 

[faroukfarouk]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

Far be it for me to know much about the subject, but I guess the point is that God created His daughters pretty already!

At the same time, if His daughters are already focused day by day on Him and His Word and His service, then questions of which shades of lipstick, how high the heels, sidecut or bob, cartilage and/or lobes pierced, etc., etc., increasingly become rather moot.

 

[Poppyseed78]

There's a difference between vanity and just a preference for presenting oneself in a neat manner that appeals to you. I try to dress modestly, but also in a way that reflects who I am. I express myself in my hairstyle, clothing styles and colors, while also striving to keep it modest. Enhancing your appearance is fine, to an extent. I mean, people should have some dignity in themselves, in their sense of self-worth, and a certain level of personal maintenance is necessary for health as well as getting and keeping a job etc.

Hopefully that made sense. Just exercise moderation.

 

[St_Worm2]

Hi LTJ, there's nothing wrong with a Christian woman wearing makeup or wanting to look as "nice" or "pretty" as possible, nothing at all (IMHO) .. UNLESS, you believe that doing so would cause an undue amount of attention to be paid to you, instead of to the Lord, especially in church.

There is also the issue of us guys to consider, married and single, who are trying to be faithful to our wives and/or to the Lord. As I heard Pastor Chuck Swindoll say to the ladies in his congregation one time, make yourselves as put-together and pretty as you can, but remember to give us guys a chance

Maybe you could consider doing this. If Jesus was going to be visiting your church this Sunday, how would you choose to dress and to do your makeup knowing that He was going to be there? Once you've figured that out, why not choose to dress that way all the time? Surely no one would have a problem if you did

Yours and His,
David

 

[Stillicidia]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

There is a light on a hill. Christians are to be a light on a hill.
Best to not only have makeup, maybe dye your hair, attract attention, then when people talk to you, you can talk about Jesus.
If you can't handle having a nice testimony, or you're not comfortable with talking to people about God, then it can become vain.
Still though, if it pleases you, know that God loves what you love, and so if you love makeup, he will love makeup because you love makeup. That is to say, makeup is not a bad thing at all, and there should be no real concern over if it's vain or not.

 

[faroukfarouk]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

PS: Some ppl even get tattooed with faith based designs because they are proven effective in witness conversations.

 

[Sketcher]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

It sounds like you're making an unhealthily big deal out of . . . everything. I'd recommend easing up. The more you ease up, the less room you have for vanity because you won't need to look good or to avoid looking good so badly.

 

[Lovethisjourney]

It sounds like you're making an unhealthily big deal out of . . . everything. I'd recommend easing up. The more you ease up, the less room you have for vanity because you won't need to look good or to avoid looking good so badly.

I definitely tend toward obsessiveness. I don't know how to change this.. I try (of course, I obsess about obsessing, as well.. it's a terrible mind trap. It's exhausting to be in my brain).

Thank you, I'm working on it.

 

[Dave-W]

I definitely tend toward obsessiveness. I don't know how to change this.. I try (of course, I obsess about obsessing, as well.. it's a terrible mind trap. It's exhausting to be in my brain).

Thank you, I'm working on it.

I understand. Its kinda like telling someone to NOT think of a pink elephant. (how many had that thought just go thru their minds?)
Or the doctor telling you to breathe "normally."

The only way to stop obsessing about something is to focus your mind on something completely different. IMO that is why the writer of Hebrews tells us "Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith..."

 

[wayfaring man]

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. <---> 1st Peter 3:1-4

**************************

When we focus a lot on the outward, we are focusing a little on the inward.

And since the outward is as the grass which withers away; while the inward is eternal...it makes no good sense to put much into 'dressing up the outward'. And it makes perfect sense to focus mainly on being beautifully adorned inwardly.

How do we beautiful the inward ?

But by embracing, with all our God-given strength, 'the fruit of The Spirit of Christ.

*************************

...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another. <---> Galatians 5:22-26

 

[Lovethisjourney]

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. <---> 1st Peter 3:1-4

**************************

When we focus a lot on the outward, we are focusing a little on the inward.

And since the outward is as the grass which withers away; while the inward is eternal...it makes no good sense to put much into 'dressing up the outward'. And it makes perfect sense to focus mainly on being beautifully adorned inwardly.

How do we beautiful the inward ?

But by embracing, with all our God-given strength, 'the fruit of The Spirit of Christ.

*************************

...the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.
If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another. <---> Galatians 5:22-26

Thank you for your reply. Good things to remember

 

[EmmaCat]

There's not a darn thing wrong with being pretty, looking nice, and keeping yourself well-groomed.

What's funny is me -- I try to look nice for my husband, but he's seen me in the shower.

Hahahaha!

All good things
Emmy

 

[All4Christ]

The problem is when your focus is taken off God to focus on you and your looks instead. Honestly, I think it is important to take care of yourself. After all, our bodies are a temple of God as well. I'm not saying to forsake prayer for hours in the bathroom putting on makeup or doing your hair. Rather, take care of yourself, feel free to look pretty, but make sure God is your top priority. Your inward heart towards God is most important.

 

[Greg J.]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

Hi Lovethisjourney,

There's nothing wrong with wanting to be attractive and spending time and effort to do so. As with everything, straying outside appropriate boundaries can lead to hurt.

IMO, if you have trouble recognizing (deep in your soul) that you are already perfect and beautiful in God's eyes (whose "opinion" is the only perfect one), then you're just like the rest of us in one way or another. All of us can know God's love and acceptance of us better. God grants the truth of that in our hearts in response to abiding in Christ.

Another way to say it is, you are struggling because (1) your concern or effort about your appearance or what people think of you is not in agreement with (2) what you think and believe is a good level of concern/effort or what you think is needed for people to see you as attractive. (When phrased this way it is easier to see the truth in the saying that true beauty comes from within.)

It's easier to conquer the struggle if you know what you're struggling with. You are struggling with what you mentioned, but at its root is how (1) you believe God sees you and (2) you see yourself. That is, if you knew in your heart that you were truly beautiful no matter what you put on your face, did to your hair, or clothed yourself with, your efforts to make yourself attractive would not be a struggle. It would be something that's easy to stay within reasonable expenditure with, just nice to do, or something you do that you enjoy. It could be to make other people happy, perhaps to make God happy (honor God, analogously expressed in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20), or perhaps to make yourself happy!

The kind of struggle you face affects your response to it. If this issue is plaguing you or hurting other facets of your life, then it might be like an addiction or the result of a deep wound. For these you should seek outside help. Spiritual counseling or perhaps seeing a Christian psychologist.

I'd recommend persisting in prayer to God that he would show you how he sees you, and perhaps also how he sees your outward appearance. Look up Bible passages about how God sees you. While Scripture will be talking about who you are in Christ, believing what God says about you will make your perception of your appearance closer to the truth. If those you want to get to know better are not finding you attractive, it is a problem with them, and one you can't do anything to solve. You'd be amazed at how much more people will find you attractive when you come to believe and know deep in your soul that you are already beautiful (which is the Truth).

I don't know if it would be helpful, but consider asking those that love you what they see about you that is beautiful. Those that love you see you more like God sees you than others. Even they won't be able to see you perfectly like God does, though.

On a practical side, perhaps educating yourself a little more about ways to make yourself attractive would make it easier for you to stay within the boundaries you would like yourself to be within.

 

[Kit Sigmon]

Hi, thanks for reading my question. I try so hard to not be vain, because for lots of my life I was vain and sinful that way (before I was saved), so now that I'm saved and aware of sin, I fight being vain. To the point where I dress down, sloppily some people would consider it (large t-shirts, baggy sweatshirts, jeans all the time) and no makeup.
Wear what you have, don't purposefully dress down...wear what you have.
If the occasion calls for jeans and a sweatshirt, wear them; however, those items don't need to be your daily uniform.

Is it okay to want to look pretty sometimes?
It's fine to look nice/pretty.

I am prone to addictive behaviors, so I was spending lots of money on makeup for awhile, so I'm trying to be sensitive to this issue. I don't want to slide back into the makeup rabbit hole.

Thanks for your patience.

My rule of thumb is this... spend no more than 30 minutes, on doing hair and make up, that is, if you plan on wearing make up or wearing your hair in the latest fashion etc.
Money for make up? replace make up as it is used up or if it's out of date, that way you only buy what you be out of.
Most places have samples, well at least where I shop has them...I usually select one or two if there's anything that I'm interested in.

 

[Goodbook]

To everything there is a season...
A time to rend and a time to sew.

Ecclesiastes 3:7

Im sure the Lord doesnt expect you to wear summer clothes in winter. If you want to dress down and keep warm thats ok and when its spring bring out the flowers.