Is hugging wrong?

[septemberskies]

I'm apart of church and campus ministry in which everyone hugs each other before getting down to business and before leaving (you even get hugs on the way into church before you sit, if you see someone from the ministry you know walking around, you just hug them).

So I was telling a guy friend this and he was like "Guys shouldn't be hugging girls" and I was like "Why?" He said that basically it arouses them physically, and guys and girls should not especially have a full frontal hug (his partial reasoning being that women have breast and feeling that pressed againsta man's body can make his mind go places he did not intend). He says that even if he is not aware, feeling a woman's body may trigger things for him mentally or even physically. He emphasized that even the most disciplined man has trouble with this. He says all that hugging can be a stumbling block. He said that side hugs are "ok" but really guys and girls shouldn't be touching at all.

Is this true fellas? Is hugging wrong?

Girls can answer this too.

-September.

 

[Keri]

I went to a private Christian school and a Bible college and both schools didn't allow full front hugs because it can be a stumbling block to some.

Hugging is not wrong, but side-hugs are best if you don't want to stumble someone.

 

[SarahlovesChrist]

well, from a polish standpoint, (this is lighthearted mind you), we love to give hugs!

God Bless

 

[YeshuamySalvation]

I'm apart of church and campus ministry in which everyone hugs each other before getting down to business and before leaving (you even get hugs on the way into church before you sit, if you see someone from the ministry you know walking around, you just hug them).

Thats great, i myself also attend a congregation were hugging is very common.. Is it not great to be part of congregation where there is that type of fellowship?

So I was telling a guy friend this and he was like "Guys shouldn't be hugging girls" and I was like "Why?" He said that basically it arouses them physically, and guys and girls should not especially have a full frontal hug (his partial reasoning being that women have breast and feeling that pressed againsta man's body can make his mind go places he did not intend). He says that even if he is not aware, feeling a woman's body may trigger things for him mentally or even physically. He emphasized that even the most disciplined man has trouble with this. He says all that hugging can be a stumbling block. He said that side hugs are "ok" but really guys and girls shouldn't be touching at all.

That is not true, it may be true for some guys and i do agree with him that if that is a stumbling block to some then they should avoid it, but thats certainly not true for all guys.. In my opinion he is judging all guys in " GENERAL" the same and that is not right.. We know that some guys may have that "tendency" and the devil does attack those areas where we tend to struggle, yet we don't all struggle on the same areas do we?

Is this true fellas? Is hugging wrong?

No, ofcourse not....

 

[septemberskies]

Thats great, i myself also attend a congregation were hugging is very common.. Is it not great to be part of congregation where there is that type of fellowship?

All of the hugs are great and i personally enjoy it.

When i first joined i was taken aback by all the hugs but now it's like apart of everyday life. All of the prior churches i've been to all just shook hands.

 

[jehovahjira]

i can speak for those who you call "some" as a teenager it was a very very big stumbling block giving and recieving hugs because my spirit was filled with lust any woman that touched me set off triggers in my mind it didn't take much to make my wonder and not long either in my oppinion hugging still isn't wrong it's the person who has something wrong within themselves

 

[Gilbertgrape]

Personally, I find side hugs very awkward.

I can kinda see his point, kinda, but should we also walk around with blindfolds on?

 

[Deliberatetourist]

I'm apart of church and campus ministry in which everyone hugs each other before getting down to business and before leaving (you even get hugs on the way into church before you sit, if you see someone from the ministry you know walking around, you just hug them).

So I was telling a guy friend this and he was like "Guys shouldn't be hugging girls" and I was like "Why?" He said that basically it arouses them physically, and guys and girls should not especially have a full frontal hug (his partial reasoning being that women have breast and feeling that pressed againsta man's body can make his mind go places he did not intend). He says that even if he is not aware, feeling a woman's body may trigger things for him mentally or even physically. He emphasized that even the most disciplined man has trouble with this. He says all that hugging can be a stumbling block. He said that side hugs are "ok" but really guys and girls shouldn't be touching at all.

Is this true fellas? Is hugging wrong?

Girls can answer this too.

-September.

Yes once you've hugged someone you've lost your virginity.

 

[harmmony]

Yes once you've hugged someone you've lost your virginity.

HILARIOUS!!!

Honestly, if we stopped doing all the behaviours which would hinder someone who may have an unusual weak area, then we wouldn't leave the house or watch TV or look at billboards or, or, or, we could go on forever.

And frankly, I really hate the image this paints of guys, that they are filled with raging uncontrollable hormones, ready to go off at any moment on any unsuspecting female. And that just assuming they are like that, which they aren't, that they are incapable of controlling themselves and so it's up to the rest of us to be the hugging police. There is such a thing as personal repsonsibility.

My main issue with indescriminate hugging is a person I hardly know invading my personal space without my permission.

 

[2scoops]

I personally don't see anything wrong with hugging one another. If a guy's hormones are so out of control and he can't contain himself then maybe a hand shake is fine.

 

[Mskedi]

I'm apart of church and campus ministry in which everyone hugs each other before getting down to business and before leaving (you even get hugs on the way into church before you sit, if you see someone from the ministry you know walking around, you just hug them).

So I was telling a guy friend this and he was like "Guys shouldn't be hugging girls" and I was like "Why?" He said that basically it arouses them physically, and guys and girls should not especially have a full frontal hug (his partial reasoning being that women have breast and feeling that pressed againsta man's body can make his mind go places he did not intend). He says that even if he is not aware, feeling a woman's body may trigger things for him mentally or even physically. He emphasized that even the most disciplined man has trouble with this. He says all that hugging can be a stumbling block. He said that side hugs are "ok" but really guys and girls shouldn't be touching at all.

Is this true fellas? Is hugging wrong?

Girls can answer this too.

-September.

Hugging is fine. For the people to whom it is a stumbling block, it is their responsibility to thrust out a hand for a handshake or to give a side hug. We cannot go around so careful of tempting/hurting others that we end up not close to anyone at all. There are people who simply do not hug (my family, for one) and most people get that feeling when it's awkward or the person steps back and the hugging ceases for that person. Hugs shouldn't be forced on people, nor should they be avoided because of some imagined temptation possibility.

 

[Niels]

Do I think hugging is wrong? Not usually. Maybe in some cases, but a lot depends on the individual.

Hugging doesn't cause me to become aroused, but it sure makes me feel awkward. I'm not usually keen on having my personal space invaded by someone I don't know well, or being pressured to do so to others.

 

[Macrina]

Yes once you've hugged someone you've lost your virginity.

And frankly, I really hate the image this paints of guys, that they are filled with raging uncontrollable hormones, ready to go off at any moment on any unsuspecting female. And that just assuming they are like that, which they aren't, that they are incapable of controlling themselves and so it's up to the rest of us to be the hugging police. There is such a thing as personal repsonsibility.

EXACTLY what I was thinking. I don't think it's very flattering to men to assume they're just these big seething blobs of hormones with no control over their lecherous selves. I'd like to think better of my brothers than that!

I mean, yes, I don't want to be deliberately provocative or knowingly tempt somebody -- but it seems like I would be insulting a guy if I thought he couldn't handle a simple hug.


With that said, I have to say I'm not a major hugger. Not anti-hug, just sort of a centrist on the whole hugging issue. I prefer it when people who don't know me very well limit themselves to a hearty handshake, and that's where I tend to leave it with most people. (personal space thing) But I do have some guy friends that I would hug under certain circumstances... and I trust that they're not overwhelmed with lust by it.

 

[Macrina]

I'm not usually keen on having my personal space invaded by someone I don't know well, or being pressured to do so to others.

Yes, I think that puts in words what I was thinking. It's a personal space thing, a sort of social intimacy, that comes naturally with some people and situations, and not with others.

 

[Sketcher]

I don't hate hugging anymore but I can't say that I enjoy it either. It's a big stumbling block for people who don't know how to guard their hearts, and we are supposed to love and look out for our brothers and sisters.

Since it's a whole church of people doing it, that's not such a bad thing. It'll just take some getting used to for your friend though.

 

[Rory]

I agree with everyone saying its nothing but a generalization about guys, sure there are some it bothers but there are those of us that think hugs ROCK and welcome them from anyone.

Back when I had a big group of friends after high school and we used to hang out all the time we'd always hug each other if the moment called for it or as a hello or bye, even if it was another guy it never bothered us because we were friends and it wasn't sexual at all. I would LOVE to find a church with that sort of fellowship, most of the ones I find you can barely talk to anyone let alone be close enough with each other in fellowship to give a hug.

If hugs are wrong then I dont wanna be right!!!

 

[ChrisCountryGirl]

Yes & No, I'm not the type of person who hugs people even close family members. I just don't like people invading my personal space. If a person's mind tends to wander into lust/temptation when hugging someone of the opposite sex, that person is better off shaking hands

 

[Gilbertgrape]

I can't speak for all of the guys here, but I'm not instantly attracted to every Woman I meet. Far from it. Sure, I meet alot I am insrattracted to.

So hugging (Frontal hug, side hug, cartwheel hug, swinging from a rope hug - it doesn't matter) someone isn't going to change that fact either.

And even if I hug someone I find attractive it isn't going to cause me to stumble.

 

[fungku]

hugging is nice

 

[Keri]

*group hug*