Being female means you have a heightened awareness of security matters. It's part of the mothering instinct (as is nesting). This is why things seem to come AT you when they may not appear that way at all to someone else (especially guys). Men tend to engage at up to close quarters... hunter instinct. A woman in the shot gun seat will see a traffic situation seem to come at her before the guy driving does. She throws up her arms and lets out a gasp, the guy thinks there's something he missed and freaks for a second then sees it's a car two blocks up the road. "Awww www!" he grumbles. "It's two freakin' blocks away!"
Then she usually blurts "Just slow down..." even though he is going under the speed limit.
Sound familiar?
Freud missed a golden opportunity to study the genders from the back seat of a car (watching them ride in the front seat together).
That's one point. Women are more concerned about security. So don't be so quick to wear the psycho label.... unless you're a nut....
Another point is, times are very tough. People don't realize the full implications of what happened over the last year (which has been building up since the 1950's). I don't recall off hand where but the Bible speaks of times / situations when setting up house is not the best thing to do... better not to marry or have kids. Too much uncertainty and if one is doing all they can just to survive having to depend on others or bringing new lives into the world may not be best...
Still another point... there are a lot of Peter Pan males flitting about the place. Oh they want love (sex), but they wouldn't know the first thing about being a man, protector, provider, layer down of their own life for their family... no it's run home to mommy... only one day mommy will be gone for good, then what?
Recap... are you with me so far? There's no reason NOT to feel insecure about these things.
Even in the best of times and with the greatest spouse in the world marriage is still a gamble and it always will be. Health, money, living where you hate to live because that's where the work is for dw or dh. The love may grow cold. The children may be handicapped. One spouse may be incapacitated and can no longer have sex. Contrary to the legal court system... marriage if it's going to be real (and if it's going to work it's gotta be real) is a life comittment. Till death do us part... not till something else comes along... Otherwise it is doomed to fail from the start.
You are not psy but wise.
My suggestion is go out and live your life as though a man or sex or children just aren't part of your plans... you'd be amazed how quickly that will bring you to the one whom you cannot live without... the keeper... the ONE for you... and then all of the above means nothing and all bets are off because THIS is George of the Jungle or Herb the Magnificent or Prince Charming etc.
Trust God.
I realized that I can't control what others do, but I *can* rely on God . . . both to provide me with what I need, *and* for my self-worth. Nothing I do will change how worthy I am . . . because it's Christ who has made me worthy.
