I believe most theists would fall into that category. At least most of them with which I have had serious discussions.
Serious discussions might be the key phrase there. Some people are around just for the proselytizing, and I don't find a lot of listening there, though with some careful work it can happen in time.
I envy you. I was a believer when I was young but then I went through a painful deconversion process. I sometimes regret that I no longer find myself able to believe in a higher power. I've struggled to find something spiritual that I can replace it with.
Oh, there's nothing to envy really. I was an atheist for years. For me it was not a deconversion process as much as an escape. I was raised religious, but I will not say it ever really sunk in.
As St. Paul says that bit about when he was a child he spoke like a child...what I had was that childish "faith" that crumbles when a person becomes an adult and can find no foundation in what they were raised, but only quicksand, or worse, demands to oppress themselves and others.
Well, maybe something did sink in. I always thought pretty highly of the red letters in my Bible, whether I believed in God or not.
Well, to be fair there are areas where people simply have no exposure to atheism. It is hard to learn about something if you have no interaction with it.
Oh, that is quite true. When I first encounter theists I assume they haven't had any exposure to atheism until I see evidence to the contrary, because the odds are in favor that's the case. At least it is where I live.
Even in my own religious community (Baha'i) where people come from all sorts of previous religious background, most people have not had much contact with straight up atheists. I field a lot of questions, and am happy to, as I think understanding where someone is coming from is always preferable when trying to discuss anything with anyone.
As for your current predicament, I can't comment on that directly. I'll just say as an atheist I undertook a study of anything religious with the express intent of understanding why humanity could so consistently believe in such stuff. And ended up religious. From my current perspective I'd say God has a great sense of humour.
In Baha'i circles the term "seeker" is used often. Seems like maybe the shoe fits? But it isn't about the destination so much as movement, so keep moving and who knows what you may find?
Especially if it is one of the 'hidden' illnesses.
Yup, that's especially what I had in mind. I've improved greatly, and there's some hope I may actually heal completely, but in the meantime I still get people saying silly things like "but you don't look sick". Whatever that is supposed to mean.
Even people with more noticeable issues have difficulty. I used to work with a man who was wheel chair bound and had only limited use of his left arm. He said one of the hardest parts was that people would be so uncomfortable that they would just avoid him. Likely why he got a job dealing with people.
It's like people talk to the wheelchair and not the person. And treat people like having a wheelchair is contagious. Or they can't hear because they cannot walk, so you'd better talk REALLY LOUD!
I know they mean well and don't get what they're doing, but people who are careless can still hurt you even if they mean well.
I can't begin to express how thankful I am the Internet exists. I would not still be alive without it, and neither would my daughter or my best friend.
As well as finding answers to our problems (because MDs sure aren't, except maybe in Functional Med), we find a ready source of people who don't treat us like we're nuts instead of just ill and trying to deal as best as we can.
In an odd way, if anything this illness does deepen my belief in a higher something. I know this is all perspective and not any sort of rigorous proof of anything, but let's just say the web of connections of people I had to run into in order to remain alive has been so large and seemingly random I find it difficult to believe it's just coincidence and not more like Providence.
Being chronically ill is a tough way to learn some spiritual lessons, but it certainly has rammed home a few for me.