Improbable Lonliness

[catch22]

Everything is so strange these days. I'm surrounded by people. Family, friends....everything and everyone. But because I'm not able to be with the one person I really want to be with, I feel lonely all the time. Is there something wrong with me? Is this normal at all? I mean at times, I can find total comfort in God and then I don't feel lonely, but the rest of the time, it's like this.

 

[msjones21]

*hugs* Yes, it's very normal. I still occasionally pine over my ex-husband, and that union has been over for almost four years now. There are times I feel very lonely even though I'm surrounded by family and friends. What I try to do is write uplifting Bible verses on index cards and then stick them in my wallet. When I feel down I pull it out and read it and meditate for a moment on whichever verse it is. I feel for you, I really do because I know how it feels. I'll be praying for you.

 

[catch22]

Thanks Ms Jones. Thats a great idea about the verses. And I really do appreciate the prayers too.

 

[72_Chev_Truck]

Dang Catch i know what your going through, i feel the same way often.

 

[catch22]

Well I'm glad to hear that I'm not totally crazy then. Although after I say what I'm about to say, that might change. It's kind of like if I can't have that one person in my life, then I almost want to feel the loneliness as some sort of reminder. Now is that crazy?

 

[William Nunn]

It's not crazy catch22, it's hard to let go of some things even though we know we can't have them.

If you're having trouble of letting go of someone, the pain of NOT having them seems to be the closest thing you'll ever get to actually having them again - so it makes us feel like we want it to linger.

You are definitely not crazy catch22, not at all. But it does pass.

 

[Neenie]

Everything is so strange these days. I'm surrounded by people. Family, friends....everything and everyone. But because I'm not able to be with the one person I really want to be with, I feel lonely all the time. Is there something wrong with me? Is this normal at all? I mean at times, I can find total comfort in God and then I don't feel lonely, but the rest of the time, it's like this.

Hi catch22 I have been through the same thing as you when I was younger, and I must say you are definitely not crazy. You will find nearly everyone will relate to your circumstance. You just have to be strong; I remember I went through suicide stages when I didn't have a boyfriend because I was so lonely; thankfully God pulled me out of that. God knows your heart, he knows how you feel just pray about it regularly. And I am almost certain God will pull you out of that situation. If not, God owes you an apology

 

[catch22]

See, here's a cool thing about my situation. I've been praying and reading my bible a lot, and I feel as if the spirit is telling me that I will most definatley see her again, but not until God has finished with what he started in me back in September. I take so much comfort in that, but I don't know if it will be tomorrow, or a year from now, or longer even before that will happen. Regardless, I'm just going to continue moving closer to the Lord until I find myself where he wants me to be.

 

[DJ B.K.]

I get those same types of feelings of lonliness sometimes even though i'm just 18.

 

[jenptcfan]

I think it's a normal emotion as long as you don't dwell on it to the point that it hinders your every day living.

I think, too, that when you have a certain person in mind that you really want to be with, it makes it worse. I'm not saying it's your fault that you're just thinking of that person...it could be that it's meant to be. I just find that it brings me down if I dwell on things like "I wonder what that person's doing right now...does he have a significant other..." Stuff like that.

God can give you peace about it and it sounds like you're seeking God in this matter by praying and reading your bible. He will be faithful to comfort you and give you enough understanding to get by.

One really neat thing I saw in a book (I think Eric and Leslie Ludy's When God Writes Your Love Story): Before he even knew who his wife would be, when the guy felt lonely and longed to have a wife and have a family life of his own, he would write in a notebook in the form of a letter to his future wife. He wrote things like "I watched a beautiful sunset tonight and I wished you were here." He eventually met a nice woman and got engaged, but he never told her about the book...until their honeymoon when he presented her with all these letters he had written to her years before he had met her. I thought that was a really neat and constructive thing to do.

 

[catch22]

Oh wow....that's pretty neat. I might have to check that book out. This situation isn't all bad for me though. In fact, I'd even say it's good. My relationship with the Lord has grown so much since I've been apart from her. I don't know how to describe this really, but although I do miss her so much, I'm not sad about it. So it's like a pleasant time of seperation. Don't get me wrong about what I'm saying there. If it truly is God's will, then I can't wait to be back together with her, but right now I'm just happy to be serving God and discovering how awesome he really is. So to reiterate yet again, I'm lonely because I'm not with her, but I'm practically overflowing with joy because I have God in my life.