I'm so confused.

[ejgsmalls]

So, I posted my little dilemma in another forum, because I didn't know this one existed. So, if y'all don't mind, could you please let me know your opinions.

I just started going to this college (like a week ago) and I'm a freshmen here, but I don't think what I am feeling is the typical freshmen thing. This school is affiliated with the methodist church, but it's not like the christian university I once thought about going to and am thinking about transfering to now. There are a lot of homosexuals at this school. And I have nothing against them, I mean, sure I think it's wrong because that's what the Bible and God tell me, but I am not the one to judge them. It also seems that A LOT of people here are concerned with partying, and who's hooking up with who. I do not date, I believe that when God is ready for me to meet the man that He wants me to be with, our relationship will be more than the typical dating couple. It seems that everyone, even the girls I hang out with are obsessed with finding the guy NOW. I mean, I would like that too, but if God doesn't think I am ready, then who am I to say otherwise. So, the point is, I don't feel like I've found my niche, and I don't think I will. I just haven't met anyone who shares my morals and values, and that bothers me. At home, all my friends have basically the same thoughts and feelings about partying and boys and what have you, but it justs seems that I am out of my league here, and I just wondered if any of you have been through this kind of stuff. I know that I rambled and probably don't make any sense. Most of you probably wouldn't say that there is a problem. But, I just feel wrong here. I can't even completely explain it and I'm sorry. But thanks for reading this and any input that you have I would appreciate greatly.

God Bless,
~Mary~

 

[fishstix]

You are experiencing the same thing that many people experience when they leave home and find themselves out in the 'real world'. It's almost a form of culture shock. You're no longer living as sheltered a life as you did when you were at home. (Although in some ways, you still are somewhat sheltered, as most of us are) You're surrounded by people who grew up in different backgrounds, with different values, and different morals. That can be very overwhelming at first. It's important that you establish for yourself what your values and morals are and that you don't allow yourself to become corrupted - be in the world but not of it. Look into Christian organizations or clubs at or near your school - you may be able to meet some friends who share your values there. At the same time, take this opportunity to learn about other people and be an example for them.

If you really feel that God is calling you to be somewhere else, then by all means obey Him. But don't assume that you aren't meant to be where you are just because it isn't comfortable. Life isn't always comfortable, especially when it involves change. And starting university is certainly change.

 

[HolyFire X]

Don't worry about it, you're not alone. I'm a freshy myself, and when I came here I found out that just about everyone except for a few on my floor are party people, and I'm not, I'm more of the guy who'll sit behind a monitor all day posting and playing games. I guess what you gotta realize is this is how it is. It is weird, at first, but you get used to it. Like the guy before me said, make sure you define who you are and not get swayed into some of the things we see at college. Also helps to join clubs of your interest that your school has to offer, so that way you don't feel so out of place all the time. Be yourself, enjoy your time, meet new friends, try new things, but don't get swayed from the Lord and don't get into anything bad. Hope that helps, and I hope you do well.
-John

 

[Boss_BlueAngels]

You haven't found one thing that will change from college to college. It is something you cannot run away from. If you want to transfer to another college, do it because of the education they offer, not because people party or like to have sex. I've said it before... it isn't the school that is the problem, it is the age group.

And you said you've been there two weeks... give it a full quarter at least. Everyone there is in the same boat, and you're certainly not going to meet all your friends within 2 weeks.

And Fishstix is absolutly right. Just because you aren't enjoying it now certainly doesn't mean that it is because God doesn't want you there. God tests us many times through life and it isn't all going to be easy and/or fun. It's easy to think that because things are going good, we're doing what God wants, and when things go bad it's a punishment for not doing what He wants... part of that may be true, but how do we learn if life is a cake-walk? (we don't)

Anyway, I hope this helps and good luck--you'll meet friends in no time.

 

[Blessed-one]

You haven't found one thing that will change from college to college. It is something you cannot run away from. If you want to transfer to another college, do it because of the education they offer, not because people party or like to have sex. I've said it before... it isn't the school that is the problem, it is the age group.

i agree. Don't be afraid of knowing people. It takes a while to learn to accept the world as it is, and also courage to stay as yourself.

 

[bliz]

You haven't found one thing that will change from college to college. It is something you cannot run away from. If you want to transfer to another college, do it because of the education they offer, not because people party or like to have sex. I've said it before... it isn't the school that is the problem, it is the age group.

Yes and no. Will you ever find a college where nobody parties? Not a chance. But this stuff playes a greater role at some colleges than it does at others. Some college have great creative student activities that really get people involved, especially on the weekends, and at other schools, everyone is simply left to their own devices.

And the population varies. At some schools hardly anyone does not party. But at others, there can be many alternative cultures, if you will. You haven't been in school long enough to scope out all the alternatives on your campus, and there may not be many, but you might be surprised. There are other people who share your values at your college - for a fact. There may not be too many, but I guarantee you there are some.

Give it time - at least don't throw away a semester. If you are really going to transfer, pay more attention to these matters when you choose your next school.

 

[SOLDOUT4HIM]

I am so feeling you, all of my suite mates party and stuff, I am so not into that scene. I like the advice of the above posts, get plugged into a good church and whatever Christian fellowship organizations are on campus. God bless, I'll pray for you.

 

[ejgsmalls]

Thanks everyone....I appreciate you input...it's still really hard, but I'm hoping it'll get better.

God Bless,
~Mary~

 

[MagicStar723]

You are experiencing the same thing that many people experience when they leave home and find themselves out in the 'real world'. It's almost a form of culture shock. You're no longer living as sheltered a life as you did when you were at home. (Although in some ways, you still are somewhat sheltered, as most of us are) You're surrounded by people who grew up in different backgrounds, with different values, and different morals. That can be very overwhelming at first. It's important that you establish for yourself what your values and morals are and that you don't allow yourself to become corrupted - be in the world but not of it. Look into Christian organizations or clubs at or near your school - you may be able to meet some friends who share your values there. At the same time, take this opportunity to learn about other people and be an example for them.

If you really feel that God is calling you to be somewhere else, then by all means obey Him. But don't assume that you aren't meant to be where you are just because it isn't comfortable. Life isn't always comfortable, especially when it involves change. And starting university is certainly change.

I couldn't agree more. Fortunately I go to community college and live at home. My boyfriend went through the "shock" last year and caused his first year to be very difficult. This year however he is doing a lot better. They may be few, but I am sure in a university you can find at least one person who has similar morals/values as you. Don't give up!

 

[Billy Batson]

if you're not letting yourself enjoy yourself because you can't let go of your upbringing, drop out or find a different place, but the next place probably won't be your thing either, since college life is fairly universal across the country unless you choose bob jones, in which case, hand holding is allowed but little else.

 

[ReformedChapin]

God bless you. I know what you're going through. I am going to a secular college and all my college bodies talk about is sex, getting drunk and how "religious" I am. Its really upsetting. What keeps my going is my faith that the Lord will find the Girl for me and he has a reason for me going to this place. Keep strong .

 

[MetalBlade]

I think that is going to happen whenever or where ever you are at. A friend of mine also went to a Christian college and experienced these things. It just happens at colleges. The best thing to do is ignore it and stand up for what you believe in.