I'm in bondage and can't escape

[Lybrah]

I need prayer. I can't confess this sin to my bible friends because it's too personal. I touch and fantasize about having sex with a man daily. I'm a woman who's never really had sex and is unmarried. I want a husband but I don't think I'm going to get one. I just can't let anyone in, and the ones I want don't want me. But I digress. I need help breaking the chains of this bondage because it's too hard and I keep giving in.

 

[rob_aston]

because it's too hard

it's ok sister, the devil is condemning you. God totally understands and says...

 

[Kenny'sID]

"Idle hands are the devils workshop"

Though that is not found as such in the Bible, I have found it to be absolutely true.

Do you have a lot of time on your hands? As practical advice, I'd say start with getting busy with something to occupy your mind and just try to get better. If you fail, keep trying. when I do that with anything, I find eventually the problem, at the very least decreases dramatically over time.

So right off the top of my head, that, and prayer for help might be a good start.

 

[HittitesA-muk]

hi Thats why God says that his people arent in bondage; and his people are delivered by God to salvation . Salvation is from God .

 

[Goodbook]

Tells satan and his demons to keep his dirty mitts of you and enticing your flesh.

You are a child of God. If this is moved to the prayer forum more ppl can pray for you. Bless you for confessing your faults. I pray for pure thoughts and a godly husband for you. Look to Jesus on the cross. He endured the shame, and yes, was even treated as a sex object by his mockers when they stripped him of his clothing.

 

[shelley1952]

I need prayer. I can't confess this sin to my bible friends because it's too personal. I touch and fantasize about having sex with a man daily. I'm a woman who's never really had sex and is unmarried. I want a husband but I don't think I'm going to get one. I just can't let anyone in, and the ones I want don't want me. But I digress. I need help breaking the chains of this bondage because it's too hard and I keep giving in.

Read the following verses
Rom 6:11 So also you count yourselves to be truly dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Rom 6:12 Then do not let sin reign in your mortal body, to obey it in its lusts.
Rom 6:13 Neither present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as one living from the dead, and your members instruments of righteousness to God.
Rom 6:14 For your sin shall not lord it over you, for you are not under Law, but under grace.
Rom 6:15 What then? Shall we sin because we are not under Law, but under grace? Let it not be!

Each one of us are mere humans but once we become a Christian these verses tell us we are now dead to sin but then why do we still do things that are not pleasing. There is actually more than one answer but I am going to make this as short as I can. Our spirit man is saved, our flesh is not......

Mat 26:41 Watch and pray, that you do not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is eager, but the flesh is weak.

Do not enter into temptation. You are to control your flesh, God does not do anymore than He has already done, I am not saying He doesnt answer prayer but sometimes the prayer may go something like this, please God help me and sometimes, not always but sometimes He says...I already answered that prayer, read my Word.

Gal 5:16 But I say, Walk in the Spirit, and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh.
Gal 5:17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another; lest whatever you may will, these things you do.

Get into Bible study, learn scripture, learn to use the weapons of warfare you have in your arsenal, thats why they are there.
Like all the rest of us you need to learn to control yourself. What you are talking about is much easier than what some others have to deal with. Learn to control yourself. Remember this, your Father, your Lord and Holy Spirit are right there watching you do this, to say, sorry, but they are in bed with you, think about that, you may think you are under the covers and under the cover of darkness, hidden away by yourself where nobody sees but you are wrong, think on that.
Blessings

 

[faroukfarouk]

A daily prayer and Bible reading habit is very important.

One day you might even meet a man who himself attaches great importance to prayer and Bible reading.

And if you marry him, you may find in time that your interest in reading the Bible and praying with him will be of even more interest than using condoms.

 

[faroukfarouk]

Read the following verses
Rom 6:11 So also you count yourselves to be truly dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Rom 6:12 Then do not let sin reign in your mortal body, to obey it in its lusts.
Rom 6:13 Neither present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as one living from the dead, and your members instruments of righteousness to God.
Rom 6:14 For your sin shall not lord it over you, for you are not under Law, but under grace.
Rom 6:15 What then? Shall we sin because we are not under Law, but under grace? Let it not be!

Each one of us are mere humans but once we become a Christian these verses tell us we are now dead to sin but then why do we still do things that are not pleasing. There is actually more than one answer but I am going to make this as short as I can. Our spirit man is saved, our flesh is not......

Mat 26:41 Watch and pray, that you do not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is eager, but the flesh is weak.

Do not enter into temptation. You are to control your flesh, God does not do anymore than He has already done, I am not saying He doesnt answer prayer but sometimes the prayer may go something like this, please God help me and sometimes, not always but sometimes He says...I already answered that prayer, read my Word.

Gal 5:16 But I say, Walk in the Spirit, and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh.
Gal 5:17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another; lest whatever you may will, these things you do.

Get into Bible study, learn scripture, learn to use the weapons of warfare you have in your arsenal, thats why they are there.
Like all the rest of us you need to learn to control yourself. What you are talking about is much easier than what some others have to deal with. Learn to control yourself. Remember this, your Father, your Lord and Holy Spirit are right there watching you do this, to say, sorry, but they are in bed with you, think about that, you may think you are under the covers and under the cover of darkness, hidden away by yourself where nobody sees but you are wrong, think on that.
Blessings

Good post; prayer and the Scriptures are the key.

Fellowship with other Christians also.

 

[Kit Sigmon]

I need prayer. I can't confess this sin to my bible friends because it's too personal. I touch and fantasize about having sex with a man daily. I'm a woman who's never really had sex and is unmarried. I want a husband but I don't think I'm going to get one. I just can't let anyone in, and the ones I want don't want me. But I digress. I need help breaking the chains of this bondage because it's too hard and I keep giving in.

Lybrah:We confess our sin to God and remember that repentance isn't just saying you be sorry. Repenting is you turning from sin, that includes renewing the mind on God's Word(scripture) and applying it in our life. It means guarding your heart, ears, eyes etc...such as: turning off provocative shows, movies, songs etc....you seek what is honoring to God....the bible is your guide and your sword. We can choose godly entertainment as well as godly people to help us.

You confessed you touch and fantasize about having sex... so are you now ready to make no provision for the flesh? Yes, no, maybe...maybe?
Choose yes...Check yourself....What are you doing to keep yourself from "falling" into sexual fantasies? What safeguards you got in place?
Are you putting on the armor of God daily? Renewing your mind on God's Word.. Are you using the bible(scriptures) to stop the fiery darts from the enemy? How do you spend your time....are you making changes so that you aren't making provision for the flesh? You see, God has given us all we need to fight this battle with the flesh...but are we actually using the "tools" he's provided for us daily?

Pondering...
What will other Christians think if I confess that I have a major struggle with sexual fantasies, lust or adulterous or fornication thoughts or desires...?
Truth be known, a lot of people have the same struggle, sadly many of them will pretend they don't. It is a real problem in the church and outside the church, that be why many marriages are in trouble or have already ended.
Masturbation and sexual fantasies are problematic for many people regardless of age, gender, intellect etc.

If a believer want to be unshackled from your idol of lusting, you got to get better rooted in your faith walk with the Lord and be in the Word(bible) regularly.
I know this... having a spouse doesn't insure that you won't touch or fantasize about having sex with another person... many have been there/done that (myself included!)
Learning self control ain't easy but it be necessary and it will not be without struggle and pain... it's why we need to examine ourselves, be honest with ourselves, you see, none of us are without sin. The only sinless one is Jesus! The only righteousness we(saved people) have is what the Lord provides to us...none of our friends are "pure", they too struggle with they fleshly nature just like the bible says... Apostle Paul spoke on this in chapter 7 of Romans.
Our helper is Jesus, an the bible teaches us about him and how to live this life...we all need to turn to the Lord not just every now and then but daily (no doubt many times a day.) We also need to believe what the bible say, and what Jesus say about us instead of what others say to the contrary.

Transparency is sorely lacking in the church body(didn't find this a problem when I was out of church though, me and my friends openly discussed anything and everything(not that we taught godliness, the point I'm making is about we were open about discussing "taboo stuff" or anything else for that matter and we didn't "attack" or put down the person who brought up the subject), but I find that we, as christians are too busy "pretending" to be all pious and stuff... if a lady shared her struggle with sexual fantasies why don't we believers show compassion?... pray and encourage the one who be struggling? instead believers look to tear someone down further, why we go about shaming them and talking junk about that person? we fake piety, we hid our own sins and act like holy rollers. Jesus didn't teach us to do that....since he didn't teach that, then we shouldn't bad-mouth, fake piety or shame someone when they confess they struggle with sin and need prayer.
Praying the Lord empowers, heals, consoles, blesses and sends to you with godly friends as you walk out this trial in your life. Remember: abide in Him, he is the true vine. Abide...abide...storms come in life, continue to abide in the Lord.

 

[FutureAndAHope]

I need prayer. I can't confess this sin to my bible friends because it's too personal. I touch and fantasize about having sex with a man daily. I'm a woman who's never really had sex and is unmarried. I want a husband but I don't think I'm going to get one. I just can't let anyone in, and the ones I want don't want me. But I digress. I need help breaking the chains of this bondage because it's too hard and I keep giving in.

The bible says along the lines of "If you are burning with lust, marry", this may seem like a hopeless verse to you at the moment, as you would be saying "but I can't seem to marry". The reality is God is faithful and just, he is not going to tell you to do something that He will not empower you to do. God can empower you to marry. Seek God for a partner. In the mean time, don't worry too much about your failures, it is only piling a false guilt upon you. The sin of mastrbation is only a sin in the sense it is not God's best for us, it is not something God will send you to hell for, or hate you for. God loves you and i am sure He sees the struggle you endure.

 

[John Hyperspace]

Let me say that the very fact that you're 'worried' about this is a very potent and good report with God concerning your love for God, and your desire to be 'perfect'. God is not about the state of your carnality, but the state of your spirituality. How does your mind, your inner woman, react to 'sin', as you perceive it to be? Do you consent that the words of God are right? Or do you perceive them as wrong? This is the important thing: Romans 7:14-17, Romans 7:25.

So think about this: how many Christians (or, anyone for that matter) are perfect? Or, why aren't people who profess love of God, and Christ - why aren't they all perfect in obedience to the perception of carnal commands? Why do they persist on sinning all of the time, everywhere? Is God just, not answering any of their prayers? Are they all to be condemned as sinners since they can't control themselves and permamnently cease from carnal sin?

Imagine a house that is being built. It's just a framework on a foundation. People walk by and say 'Shameful house; doesn't even have walls. Not even a roof to keep out the rain.' The house knows that the law of the house says that a perfect house has a roof that keeps out the rain; and a house without a roof is a bad house not fit for dwelling therein. Now the house is lamenting her inability to keep out the rain. The house pleads for prayers to help her be a good house and keep out the rain. But no matter how she tries and tries, she just can't keep out the rain.

Now, the carpenter and architect arrives, and the house laments 'Why have you made me this way? Why won't you make it so I can keep out the rain? Why won't you answer my pleas?' and the carpenter says 'But I AM helping you. Leave me to my work, and believe me when I tell you, you WILL keep out the rain.'

The carpenter puts up walls on the house, then leaves. Again others walk by 'Such a shameful house. No roof!' And the house again laments. Then the carpenter shows up on the last day of work, and puts the roof on the house. 'There you go,' he says. 'All done.'

People walk by and exclaim 'Such an house! Perfect in form and construction!' and the house beams and smiles.

Yes, you're the house. Trust the carpenter. He will finish the work. In the meantime, don't sweat not being able to keep out the rain. You're still in the process of being built. The passerbys and yourself are thinking from the point of view of the finished house, and they're judging you according to that measure, and so are you. But what both you and they should realize is that, you're not done yet. Knowing this, you should be quite a happy little house who - even though yet unable to fulfill the law of the house, to keep out the rain, the carpenter knows what he is doing, and has promised you the finished work, which he will indeed finish in his own time.

In the meanwhile, love your fellow houses, and encourage them as well. Assure them that the carpenter by no means will fail in his work. Hebrews 12:2, Zechariah 4:9, Revelation 21:6

 

[wayfaring man]

Hi L,

May The Lord Be Pleased to Bless.

Salvation is primarily composed of three divine elements. And these three work together as one, with the same goal and objective; namely that we who believe on The Son of God will not perish, but have everlasting life, in a place free from hurt or woe, and full of joy and love.

The three elements are -

1. Mercy - which covers sins that are in the past.

2. Grace - which enables us to overcome / endure temptation in the present.

3. Longsuffering - which gives us a generous space to repent, for as long as we yet do live..

You see God has us covered - our past, our present, our future...so that we may comprehend that there is no such time in which we are abandoned or without hope. And this understanding is also key to our being enabled to endure and overcome, any and all that the enemies of Christ's righteousness may cast our way.

This also is a distinct manifestation of God's Love for us!

And His desire for us to live forever wth Him in Heavenly Places !

Moreover, when we first believe we can easily enjoy God's mercy. (Who doesn't like being forgiven ?!)

When start to grow spiritually we realize our need for grace to give us the ability to endure and overcome.

But if/when we yet fail, we see how important God's longsuffering is for our salvation.

We have no excuse.

But we do have a God who is willing to bear with us, and provide for us things which will greatly help us along the Way.

Things such as godly encouragements, holy admonitions, reminders of how much our dear Lord suffered (so that we could be made whole), and even rebukes and chastisements, if/when the milder helps fall on deaf ears.

These also are manifestations of God's Great Love for us. And His desire to personally adopt us into His Holy, Heavenly family !

Ask God for wisdom and strength to endure and overcome temptations to sin.

Knowing that this is His Divine Will for us who have received Christ's Testimony.

Notice the order of 'endure and overcome'.

First we endure, then we overcome.

When temptations come, they will try to make it seem like the only way for them to go away is for us to succumb. But that is a lie. They can and will go away if we busy ourself with something far removed from their essence. And what is more far removed from the carnal and the sensual, than the holy and the divine; particularly as was demonstrated by the life of Yeshua.

So embracing the promises of God's Good Will for us, may we step up to the challenge, and fight the good fight of faith, as those who sincerely long to be free from all that would drag us down and darken our spirit.

And if we fail, do not despair, in such a way as to give up the fight, for as long as we have breath, there is hope that we may gain that long awaited victory in Christ !

And may The Glory of The Lord thereby be magnified. Amen.

 

[LastAcorn99]

A desire for intimacy and companionship can be strong feelings, and I know that it’s not easy when these longings are unfulfilled. Sending you prayers, asking the Lord to grant you His grace and victory over the struggles you’re facing. I would strongly suggest that you have an accountability partner, a trusted friend or a pastor, who can encourage and support you as you work towards overcoming this battle. God bless you!

 

[Sketcher]

This sounds normal, to be honest. I don't know if you desire it more or less than other women, but for men, this is a daily reality.

 

[Quasicentennial]

It might seem to take decades to become a mature ambassador of Christ, to have the right and only true Jesus Christ in your life and also with every person you socialise in your life who may not be perfect as mature ambassadors of Christ, and who may have locked-up emotional baggage that they want to get rid of but will have to rely on Christ's spiritual healing for positive everyday survival through constant prayer, even if a first-time non-Christian may act dishonestly with you, then you must be strong, authoritative as Christ's true spiritual laws are with you: no sex before marriage, get to know each other with Christ's love in both of you as you both face your daily challenges with yourselves and the local community ;;

 

[Dave-W]

I need prayer. I can't confess this sin to my bible friends because it's too personal. I touch and fantasize about having sex with a man daily.

I know the standard party line is the bible does not mention masturbation, but I believe it does in a few places, and none more clear than Song of Solomon chapter 5, starting in verse 2. Yes, it is couched in symbolic language.

But the point is Shulamite either dreams or fantasizes about her man and then does the deed and is called "undefiled" by him.