I'm I subconsciously unjustly judging my peers?

[salt-n-light]

Hey everyone!

So as I face sitting with friends who are not walking with God, at times I ponder if I am subconsciously judging, and if that ever gave others an energy that is not one that would give God glory. Not a subconsciousness per say that looks down on someone, but with understanding of what God will for us to be and being aware of that as I talk with people.I get that naturally those in disagreement with certain topics will have some sort of tension, but at the same time I know that alot of times its not my place to bring it up and put more tension than it needs to be, especially if they are already choosing not to be a Christian.

For example, sometimes I sit with those who maybe want to talk about sexual things, or maybe they are in a relationship that God wouldn't condone (e.g. same sex).I do hang with them from time to time, and enjoy the company and they don't complain or show signs of discomfort,but at the same time I know that my spirit clashes with theirs in alot of stuff. I end up holding back alot and wrestling with myself.

How does one reconcile with that?

 

[bèlla]

I extend the same grace that I show to Christians. It is one thing to err because you’re lost and another when you know the truth. The latter is more taxing on the mind and spirit.

 

[ChicanaRose]

Hey everyone!
For example, sometimes I sit with those who maybe want to talk about sexual things, or maybe they are in a relationship that God wouldn't condone (e.g. same sex).I do hang with them from time to time, and enjoy the company and they don't complain or show signs of discomfort,but at the same time I know that my spirit clashes with theirs in alot of stuff.

I've hung out with people who were in heterosexual relationships that God didn't condone (i.e. cohabitation, etc.) Unless they were trying to get out of it, I didn't feel that we shared the common goal of at least desiring (even though no one is perfect) to please God.

 

[Aussie Pete]

Hey everyone!

So as I face sitting with friends who are not walking with God, at times I ponder if I am subconsciously judging, and if that ever gave others an energy that is not one that would give God glory. Not a subconsciousness per say that looks down on someone, but with understanding of what God will for us to be and being aware of that as I talk with people.I get that naturally those in disagreement with certain topics will have some sort of tension, but at the same time I know that alot of times its not my place to bring it up and put more tension than it needs to be, especially if they are already choosing not to be a Christian.

For example, sometimes I sit with those who maybe want to talk about sexual things, or maybe they are in a relationship that God wouldn't condone (e.g. same sex).I do hang with them from time to time, and enjoy the company and they don't complain or show signs of discomfort,but at the same time I know that my spirit clashes with theirs in alot of stuff. I end up holding back alot and wrestling with myself.

How does one reconcile with that?[/QUOTE
I spent the first several years of my Christian life in the Navy (military). In many ways, it was extremely difficult. My usual response was simply to walk away when the subjects became objectionable. If they have any conscience at all, they will be convicted. Hating sin is a sign of being born again, not being judgemental. Some of my colleagues were deliberately foul mouthed because they wanted to get a reaction. "Bad company corrupts good morals". I'd be careful who you hang out with. Ask God to show you what to do. You can and should bind the evil spirits in those people also. I knew nothing of spiritual warfare while I was in the Navy. I believe things would have been a lot different if I had known.

 

[salt-n-light]

I've hung out with people who were in heterosexual relationships that God didn't condone (i.e. cohabitation, etc.) Unless they were trying to get out of it, I didn't feel that we shared the common goal of at least desiring (even though no one is perfect) to please God.

How did it feel whenever its brought up during the times you do hang out with them? Were you 100% chill about it, or did you train yourself to not make it a deal, or does it trouble you sometimes?

 

[ChicanaRose]

How did it feel whenever its brought up during the times you do hang out with them? Were you 100% chill about it, or did you train yourself to not make it a deal, or does it trouble you sometimes?

I'm assuming we are talking about Christians and not non-Christians (right?)

In cases that they were not trying to get out of it but kept justifying their choices, it really troubled me.

I tried not to show my discomfort but couldn't support what was being said either.

 

[com7fy8]

So as I face sitting with friends who are not walking with God, at times I ponder if I am subconsciously judging, and if that ever gave others an energy that is not one that would give God glory.

I think Jesus means not to condemn anyone as having no hope. But yes we do need to see if someone is evil or of God. We need to be able to evaluate if and how to trust a person.

If I am self-righteously looking down on someone, this is not having hope in love's prayer and caring for the person.

And yes your spirit can spread how you are to make others the same way. So, it is important to be good example in the sight of God >

"nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock." (1 Peter 5:3)

So, our judging needs to not be exalting ourselves as lords over others. But evaluate humbly, even point out how you have been wrong and you were missing out on how you could have been loving.

 

[salt-n-light]

I'm assuming we are talking about Christians and not non-Christians (right?)

In cases that they were not trying to get out of it but kept justifying their choices, it really troubled me.

I tried not to show my discomfort but couldn't support what was being said either.

Non-christians.

Christians I would have no problem bringing things up because we are walking the same path as brother and sisters in Christ. We ought to check each other in love, and they would more understand if I was to bring up something.

But im talking about non-christians, those who don't intend to follow Christ and live in accordance to that. Especially when they seek to build close friendships with me, I do face the clash of values that i wonder if i give that energy that I am not intending to support certain behaviors that probably the world would normally deem as ok. I try to not show discomfort because at the end of the day they don't believe in Christ and i wouldn't expect them to walk as such unless they expressed so and everyone is under grace, at the same time its hard to keep it under subjection when it comes to what God wants for everyone, and sometimes I wonder if that energy kinda leaks out.

 

[ChicanaRose]

Non-christians.

I see. With non-Christians, you can pray for their salvation in your mind. So whenever they say something that troubles you, immediately take it to God in silent prayer.

 

[bèlla]

If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them.

And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same.

And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. —Luke 6:32-34

 

[com7fy8]

I try to not show discomfort because at the end of the day they don't believe in Christ and i wouldn't expect them to walk as such unless they expressed so and everyone is under grace,

Of course they can not be expected to walk with Jesus while they still have not trusted in Jesus for salvation. But it can be good to let them know how you feel . . . as your witness and testimony of what your Christian experience is like. But the emphasis needs to be on how God feels, and how God sees things, and we will answer to Him.

But I would not constantly be telling them what you are feeling.

Also, we need to not be under the power of evil people.

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." (Romans 12:21)

A thing is, I think of now, that if you tell how you are feeling, there could be ones who will do more in order to make you uncomfortable, or in order to make their point that you are not going to control what they do. But others might just apologize more often whenever they say or do or talk about something you say makes you uncomfortable.

In any case, we need to be ready to not allow sinners to have power to control what we are feeling . . . or where our attention is going!

You need to be in control, with God in you; this is what I mean. There can be times and ways to tell them how you feel, plus how God feels . . . so they can get some teaching about how Jesus wants us to live . . . and to love. Otherwise, how can they know they have sin trouble, and therefore they need how Jesus has died for us?

But I would do this when and how God guides. I personally am not sure God wants us to talk about every thing wrong people do, every time and moment they do it. What about you? You can sin; so may be we need to tell them about how we sin and God is correcting us

You might be surprised. If you were to bring attention to something, ones might say, Oh we know you believe that, and we don't mean to hurt you. Or . . . there are other things people might say, which our forum's site monitor would call the "[bless and do not curse]" sort.