I'm depressed and atheist

[Monamie]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

 

[Basil the Great]

Monamie - Welcome to the forums and I hope that you find your experience here most interesting and rewarding. Like you and many others here, I also have suffered from depression. I fought situational depression off and on for about 25 years, perhaps on 5 different occasions in a fairly serious way. Luckily, I have been free of it now for 20-25 years. If you can find a copy of the classic book by the late Dale Carnegie, "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living", please read it. It has many different solutions on how to deal with worry and depression. You do not have to be religious or believe in God in order to be free of serious depression and be a productive member of society, though many of us believe that faith in God does help one cope with life's problems. The best method that I have ever found to deal with depression is to find some way to help others in need and assist them as best you can. You could volunteer at a homeless shelter or food pantry or local hospital or assist an elderly neighbor with chores.

For some, depression does appear to be an inherited disability and sometimes this requires medication and/or in depth counseling. Whatever you do, try and keep a positive attitude and realize that life is full of glorious wonders and everyday is a gift to be lived to the best of our human ability. Peace be with you.

 

[Greg J.]

Welcome to ChristianForums. It sounds like there are all kinds of valid reasons you are depressed. Jesus offers you a different and new life. The path to receiving it is to start obeying him. Get a New Testament and start reading. He will grant you to know He is real.

 

[Strathos]

What other religions have you studied?

 

[A_Thinker]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

I've been depressed ... even as a believer.

After the deaths of loved ones, I wondered what was the point of it all. Fortunately, I found an answer.

We are here to LOVE ... and to be LOVED. Loving people (helping them, encouraging them, comforting them, praying for them, etc.) brings me joy in this life.

And it just so happens that the focus of Jesus of Christianity ... is LOVE. Before He left His disciples, Jesus said to them ... "A new commandment I give to you ... that you love one another as I have loved you." By this will everyone know that you are my disciples, if you have LOVE for one another."

Because LOVE is my life's answer, ... I am content to follow Jesus. I may not understand everything that's going on around me, ... but I can walk in LOVE.

 

[truefiction1]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

Hi.

 

[redleghunter]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

Hello Monamie and welcome to Christian Forums.

The God of Holy Scriptures deals with humans by promises. His promise is eternal life for all those who believe and trust in His Son Jesus Christ. This is the Christian Hope.

What is your hope?

 

[Rescued One]

I'm so very, very sorry! I wish I could visit you and be your friend. Do you have any close friends? Humans need caring friends! When I left the Mormon religion, I had no close friends. That was depressing. When I thought about atheism, that was depressing. My father was an atheist.

Don't consider suicide. The unknown could be worse. Do you go outdoors for walks? Is it safe? It might help.

 

[Barney2.0]

Well Monamie I was born into a Muslim family and grew very distant from Islam, I left my faith when I was 13 after looking into it. The only difference is I went through paganism instead of Athiesm, I went into Zoroastrianism and Iranian beliefs soon after. I became disaffected with both as soon I started to realize that I was in such a bad emotional state and realized none of the prayers I offered to the Gods seemed to be answered. After a while I began to wonder if the gods were even listening at all or if they were just pieces of stone, wood, and imagination. Even though I prayed for a sign from the gods, it never came. I long had an interest in Christianity since childhood as it was the only Abrahamic faith I warmed up to, Judaism and Islam always seemed oppressive to me (I eventually learned Judaism wasn’t actually oppressive just Islam was). I prayed one night to the man they call Jesus and at the same time I prayed to my gods and asked who would I see that night. I did not see Anahita, Rudā, Nuha, or Athtarsamayn, I only saw the one they call Jesus draped in white robes, with his arms outstretched to me, he just stood there waiting for me. I’ve been believing in him ever since then and I’ve never looked back.

 

[Colter]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

Hi, thanks for sharing. Search for God within your own heart, God can be found quite apart from religious institutions. I'm happiest when I forget myself and serve other people. I also find God being manifest in other people.

 

[dzheremi]

Lord have mercy upon your servant, Mona.

Welcome to the forums, friend. I am so sorry to hear of your struggle and pain. I have never been Muslim myself, but as you might guess if you know anything about the Coptic Orthodox Church, I know more than a few Muslims. I also know a few ex-Muslims and they say similar things as you have said. It is very, very hard and can be very dangerous to leave Islam. Please be safe in all things.

Even if you no longer believe, we will still pray for you and your situation. Remember that the Lord never abandons anyone to the end, and the angels in heaven rejoice more at the recovery of one soul than at the reception of a hundred in whom there was no doubt. He is our shepherd...even of those who no longer hear Him. He goes out of His way especially for these. I know. I am one too. نشكرلله أخذني البركة

 

[John Bowen]

Your sense of self has been shattered .Who you thought you where a Muslim and build your sense of self through that .Same thing happens to people when they get divorced or lose a job that they strongly identified with. You need to build a new sense of who you are .Seek therapy it will help you uncover your beliefs so you can see what is real and what is not real and dismiss it.

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

The bottom line is coming to know that there is a Living God out there who created you in His own image and who has communicated to mankind. When you come to that knowledge, the only way then is up.

 

[paul1149]

Hi Monamie,

I hope you find what you are looking for. We are not promised an easy life, but the God who made you loves you - so much, in fact, that He came as a man and laid down His life for you.

My understanding of Islam is that it is a religion of works. One has to do good deeds, and in the end they are weighed against the bad, to see if you are worthy. That's a heavy burden to carry, because sin works in us. This is why Jesus came to pay the price of reconciling us back to the Father. He offers us salvation up-front, unearned. All we need to do is believe and receive Him as Savior and Lord. Because of His love, we are saved by grace, not works.

Jesus promises that all who ask, receive, all who seek, find, and all who knock, have it opened to them (Matthew 7). I don't know what you experienced in your religion, but I can assure you that relationship with Jesus is much different than anything this world has to offer, including other religions.

 

[ItIsFinished!]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

Religion is religion.
Jesus Christ is the truth.
Have you ever accepted Jesus Christ as your Saviour?
There is no hope outside of Jesus Christ.
He personally laid down His life for you, I, and the rest of the world.
No other can fill that void, other then Jesus Christ.

 

[Monamie]

What other religions have you studied?

I have studied every religion I even polytheist religions. I've literally spent everyday researching and this is the reason why im so drained. I just want an answer for all these years of questions.

 

[Monamie]

Religion is religion.
Jesus Christ is the truth.
Have you ever accepted Jesus Christ as your Saviour?
There is no hope outside of Jesus Christ.
He personally laid down His life for you, I, and the rest of the world.
No other can fill that void, other then Jesus Christ.

I went to many churches and I converted however I left the church feeling like I was lying about my conversion. I tried so many times to accept I even cried my eyes out asking God to make me feel whole again but nothing. It frustrates me knowing others are happy in Christ while I always feel left out.

 

[GTW27]

The Lord is never far from anyone. Pray a simple prayer. Just say, Show me you are real. I need you now.
"For all who ask, will receive, and all who seek, will find, and if you knock, The Door will be opened unto you." So that you may know, after all your searching, The Truth can only be found in Jesus.

 

[Southernscotty]

I went to many churches and I converted however I left the church feeling like I was lying about my conversion. I tried so many times to accept I even cried my eyes out asking God to make me feel whole again but nothing. It frustrates me knowing others are happy in Christ while I always feel left out.

Hello dear friend and welcome to CF, I am so glad that you have came here looking for answers, First you say that you have went to many churches, but did 'Not' feel that heart "connection or conversion". There are several variables here, but one cannot base their salvation on feelings alone. I would be very interested to to know how have you have personally accepted Jesus?

 

[mnorian]

I was born into a muslim family and grew up muslim. I left my faith at 16 after studying for an exam and learning the truth about my faith. Since then I have been faithless. These years have been so hard for me. I became severely depressed and suffered frequent panic attacks I blacked out so many times for no apparent reason and was always in the hospital. I'm so emotionally drained. Mona take this pill take that pill so many pills! I'm tired! I can't go on any longer. This isn't a life I feel imprisoned. When I had faith even though it was the wrong one I was always happy and care free. I want that back. I want to be happy and carefree again. However I cant bring myself to believe in any religion. I can't. I'm have reached my peak and my journey ends here. I'm not suicidal, not yet at least.

Hi Mona;
welcome to CF; May the Lord Jesus guide you here as well as in the world; and may you find friends and what ever you need from the Lord here. I do have a question for you; do you like music--Praise & Worship music? Well we have a new forum here at CF just for P&W music and at the top is a directory of other Christian music threads around CF; come and take a look!

Praise and Worship Music

To The