I think that the problem is that many Christians are being taught from the pulpits that God chose them personally, without any condition of repentance or faith toward God.. ie, unconditional election.
In all these discussions on election... How often do we see Christ glorified in that He is the elect, the Chosen one in whom the Father delights..? Often He is not even mentioned in the discussion.
Furthermore, how often do we think of these verses in light of calling ourselves the elect, rather than Christ..
By the offense of one (Adam), condemnation has come upon all men, and by the righteousness of one (Christ, the last Adam), justification of life.
Or..
If ye shall seek to save your life ye shall lose it, and if ye shall lose it for ME and the gospel, ye shall save it..
Or..
If any man shall come after Me, let him deny himself, take up his cross and follow Me.
Here's the reason why the church is referred to the 'elect'..
Because we are members of His body.. the body of Christ.. and we know (or should know) that He is the elect, the one in whom the Father delights.
The Father loveth the Son and has given all things into His hand.. he that believes on the Son has everlasting life, and he that believes not, the wrath of God abides on him.
Saying that we are the elect is only half the truth, the whole truth is that we are the elect of God IN HIM, and again, because He is the elect, the one in whom the Father delights.