• The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.

    If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.

    If you have spiritual issues related to a mental health and recovery issue, please use the Recovery Related Spiritual Advice forum. This forum is designed to be like Christian Advice, only for recovery type of issues. Recovery being like a family in many ways, allows us to support one another together. May you be blessed today and each day.

    Kristen.NewCreation and FreeinChrist

  • Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

I was just thinking....

Status
Not open for further replies.

NoddaProbBob

And step by step, You'll lead me...
Feb 20, 2006
459
26
Northern Illinois
✟23,269.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Republican
I was just thinking how maybe it's finally time that I tell my parents that I cut.

I'm not saying that it's going to be easy, and Im not thinking that at all. I'm just completely sick of lying to them and to everyone else about the marks on my arms. and It's becoming exhausting.

I'm honestly not sure what to do. I mean, I think I owe it to myself to finally get help. But I'm so scared of teh rejection. And I really have a feeling that what happened today, isn't going to go away.
*story time* so after church today I took off my sweatshirt and I still had it draped over the spot on my arm, but I was talking to some people and I must have just not noticed, and moved the sweatshirt, and my mom saw the marks. Then she made a huge ordeal out of it and I lied and told her that I burned my arm at work. and then my dad wanted to see. and I could just tell that there was this uncertainty in his eyes. like they knew. And Im just sick of lying to everyone and ugh. Im so angry and frustrated. but Im scared that my relationship with my parents is going to change.

And I know it will. They're going to think I'm 100% insane and ontop of it, I will more than likely get in trouble. And I will get yelled at, and they probably won't understand why. I thought my relationship with them was so strong, but I have a feeling that it's not as strong as any of us thought.
I'm scared of what's going to happen. I think they need to know. But Im really worried that they're going to hate me. and I know that sounds dramatic, but they would treat me a lot different, and I don't want to be treated any differently than I am now. And then there would be the idea of trust. How would they trust me ever again? Even when they first thought that I was, I remember my dad got really angry, and then my mom was just all like, what kind of person does that to themselves? And how was I to explain that. I couldn't. Nor was I going to try.

So. To the those of you who have had to tell you're parents or have been brave enough to do so, how did you do it. And does anyone feel the same way I do?
I just feel like this needs to be taken off my chest, and I really think that it should. But I just need help getting it out.
thanks
J.j.
 

texannurse

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2006
745
54
✟1,183.00
Faith
Catholic
Politics
US-Republican
Aw hun!

My parents have no clue - they live hundreds of miles away and I will probably never tell them.
BUT, people I do care about and who care about me know and support me. I know, believe me, I know how those 3 words are some of the hardest ever spoken - "I cut myself". I guess you have to get to the point where you are so sick of it you decide to open up and get the help you need. I am proud of you for even getting to that point - to realize you need to be honest and get help.

I'll be praying for you. PM if you ever need to. TN
 
Upvote 0

startingxthexjourney

Holding on to Him...
Mar 1, 2007
350
7
35
✟15,518.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Hey!
it is hard to do, believe me. when i told my mom, i was petrified. i knew i had to tell her because the summer was coming and my legs looked the worst they ever had. i just kind of spilled it and was like "do what you want with what i am telling you". she took me to a shrink, who i still go to a year later, and i still SI. it's so hard to tell them, i know. but it works out for the best, in most cases. they won't understand fully, but they are your parents and they WILL love you no matter what.
i'm here if you ever want to dump/talk. pm me!
~mary ellen
 
Upvote 0

mamalonglegs

Active Member
May 21, 2006
182
7
Shelburne, New Hamphshire
✟22,829.00
Faith
Protestant
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Others
Let's look at this way. They already know somethings up. Go ahead and tell them. They may not respond in a kind way just because the "don't get it!" After the dust settles a bit, you might ask them if they are interested in know why you are involved in what you are doing. Give them a chance. Whatever they choose is NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.
Go and find people who can and will help you. That is what is important right now. Don't be like me and wait until you are in your forties before truly getting help. I wasted a lot of years being miserable when I didn't have to. I'm cheering for you and praying. I will put you on my list.
mamalonglegs
 
Upvote 0

livingforGod135

Regular Member
Apr 3, 2007
163
13
WA
✟15,328.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
yes i felt the same way you did before i told my parents, how i did it: recognised that i needed to (as you have done) and prayed God would give me the courage to do so... and he did!

and now i have a story time for you:
before i told my parents i told my youth pastor... he encouraged me to tell my parents and i did, i sat them down and man i was so scared i was shaking i couldnt say anything but eventually managed to get out 'i cut myself' and that was all i could say, its not like we had a proper conversation or anything, but the relief after i had told them WOW it was like the weight of the world had lifted off my shoulders and i felt free, no more lies (*cough*) of course my parents didnt understand, and i doubt yours will, but my parents did try, one thing i have learnt is its close to impossible to understand a problem when the person with said problem refuses to share... you have to help them understand, i didnt really talk to my parents and as a result now, well i think they've given in

with your parents:
treat you different: maybe, for a while, until they realise it's still the same you
hate you: i may be wrong but i really dont think so
btw trying to explain to your mum 'what kind of a person does that' would help your mum to understand and thus help you

Laura
 
Upvote 0
Status
Not open for further replies.