So Why the Title you may ask?
Well i got medium autism and yea it's kinda helpful with creativity and I am very very smart in Computer Security but it has it's weakness like I was a blackhat Hacker for 20 years and did some pretty bad things due to my mind not knowing what I was doing was wrong. I still don't see things I do is wrong but others see it. I also have short term memory which is getting so bad that I can forget a whole day if just something interrupts my mind "if I'm talking to my mum and some kind of noise goes off outside I will forget everything" Then the bad social interaction which makes me have friends but I feel as if they aren't my friends cause they never want to see me or let me cry on there shoulders, but when something is wrong with them i come to help (My Christian background/nature) - I also am so scared to go places alone like to shops or a doctor even to meet family and friends. I have to sit in my car and pump my self up to just get out of the car, and if I'm in the shops I have to call a friend just to talk to them so I feel safe.
Then to top that off I also was born with a club foot which was fixed at birth but one my legs is thinner then the other and as much as I try to build it up it can never be the same as my other normal leg. I however can walk fine which is good. I wear long pants all the time cause I'm so scared people will stare at me. And even though now at age 28 I don't think that way i just have got into the mindset I have to wear long pants everywhere.
Then I was also born Both sexes "hermaphrodite" and My parents decided my sex at birth "male" but I was born with xx and half y (hard to explain) and ovaries and uterus making it so I could of if my parents decided me to be female get pregnant. I've grown up thinking I was female but told I was male till I found out by a doctor friend that I should be female due to my internals and mindset. So I been trying to go back as female.. You could call it Transgender but I'm on a total different level to the normal - Male going Female. Then my parents disagreeing with my life which isn't the most fun thing...
All i can say if anyone of you is interested in Computer Security and your young, Do not and I mean it.. Do Not get into illegal activities even if you think it's not bad in your mind try everything you can to point it to legal things by maybe buying 2 -3 cheap computers and setting up a lap in your room to learn on a home network. I say this because I got into trouble and had the stress of nearly going to jail for a long time. I repent to God for all the criminal things I done via computers and I know god forgave me and since then I been set free of the hacking world and mindset.
But As I was saying.. Don't feel bad about what you have because just think about other people cause others may have it worse then yourself.
Well i got medium autism and yea it's kinda helpful with creativity and I am very very smart in Computer Security but it has it's weakness like I was a blackhat Hacker for 20 years and did some pretty bad things due to my mind not knowing what I was doing was wrong. I still don't see things I do is wrong but others see it. I also have short term memory which is getting so bad that I can forget a whole day if just something interrupts my mind "if I'm talking to my mum and some kind of noise goes off outside I will forget everything" Then the bad social interaction which makes me have friends but I feel as if they aren't my friends cause they never want to see me or let me cry on there shoulders, but when something is wrong with them i come to help (My Christian background/nature) - I also am so scared to go places alone like to shops or a doctor even to meet family and friends. I have to sit in my car and pump my self up to just get out of the car, and if I'm in the shops I have to call a friend just to talk to them so I feel safe.
Then to top that off I also was born with a club foot which was fixed at birth but one my legs is thinner then the other and as much as I try to build it up it can never be the same as my other normal leg. I however can walk fine which is good. I wear long pants all the time cause I'm so scared people will stare at me. And even though now at age 28 I don't think that way i just have got into the mindset I have to wear long pants everywhere.
Then I was also born Both sexes "hermaphrodite" and My parents decided my sex at birth "male" but I was born with xx and half y (hard to explain) and ovaries and uterus making it so I could of if my parents decided me to be female get pregnant. I've grown up thinking I was female but told I was male till I found out by a doctor friend that I should be female due to my internals and mindset. So I been trying to go back as female.. You could call it Transgender but I'm on a total different level to the normal - Male going Female. Then my parents disagreeing with my life which isn't the most fun thing...
All i can say if anyone of you is interested in Computer Security and your young, Do not and I mean it.. Do Not get into illegal activities even if you think it's not bad in your mind try everything you can to point it to legal things by maybe buying 2 -3 cheap computers and setting up a lap in your room to learn on a home network. I say this because I got into trouble and had the stress of nearly going to jail for a long time. I repent to God for all the criminal things I done via computers and I know god forgave me and since then I been set free of the hacking world and mindset.
But As I was saying.. Don't feel bad about what you have because just think about other people cause others may have it worse then yourself.
