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A: Let’s start with, “The two shall become one flesh,” in Genesis 2:24, quoted by Christ and Saint Paul. Thus, wife-abuse is self-abuse. I’ll touch more on Ephesians 5 in a moment. Before that, keep in mind that any violence or hateful thought toward another is a sin (as 1 John 3:15 says, “Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer”, so threats or violence against one’s wife violate the commandment against killing.
Now we can look a bit more at the latter part of Ephesians 5. Verse 21 addresses general Christian behavior, urging all to be “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Applying this to marriage, neither spouse is to take advantage of nor mistreat the other. While the husband is made “head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the Church,” this headship is intended to look after the body and do what is best for the bride.
Does God Trap Women in Marriages to Abusive Men?
Review of Barbara Roberts' book
Not Under Bondage: Biblical Divorce for Abuse, Adultery & Desertion
After 35 years of teaching on marriage, training at two women's shelters, and looking back at what happened to many of my students, I highly recommend Not Under Bondage. Barbara's insights and teaching is badly needed by Christians who often neglect God's righteous solution of disciplinary divorce for certain problems that fail to respond to implimenting God's word into the relationship.
If more people exercised God's way of escape by divorcing for impenitent sin in their homes, I believe Christians would exert tremendous peer pressure on wayward spouses as they acknowledge that God does not tolerate ungodly conduct among family members. Sin thrives on secrecy and a mate falsely thinking, It's my fault, instead of demanding accountability.
As Christians, we often focus so strongly on saving the marriage that we turn a blind eye to the other person's free will in choosing to be abusive rather than loving. Love is a choice as is demonstrated by the commands in the Bible to love others. We don't earn another person's love. And often the justifications for refusing to love are utterly ridiculous and selfish. Sometimes God's answer to marriage problems is divorce, and when we resist that answer, we are flirting with harm for our spouses, children, and ourselves. Counselors at women's shelters report that unchecked abuse always gets worse. Sometimes it gets worse so slowly, that the violated mate does not realize what is happening until the sin is so entrenched in the marriage that reconciliation is impossible. Earlier punitive divorce may well have been the catalyst to turn a sinner from his destructive behavior toward his mate and children, and even himself.
And Jesus expect a woman to put up wtih physical, mental, and emotional abuse?Love your husband the way Jesus loves you. No more, no less.
Its NOT TRUE that once struck you will be struck again...as a rule
IF struck, leave THEN....stay gone awhile, safety, etc. But do not fall for the lie that once struck you WILL be struck again....
I've worked with domestic violence victims since 1997...in those 13 years I've never seen physical abuse stop once it's started...
never ... once .... in 13 years...
I wish you luck and healing if that's what your faith leads you to do...
But I urge you to have a safety plan in place just in case....
Don't consider it a lack of faith...but smart planning.
I've seen too many battered, bruised, broken, and even murdered women...by the very men commanded to protect them and love them as their own flesh to not encourage a backup plan.
Be well, travel safely.
you are wise to have left, and to wait to know change. God can only transform the heart that opens to him. This may not be your husbands.. it may be, but that is up to him. In the meantime, let God transform YOUR heart, because that is the only heart that you have access to.This maybe true but lets not forget we believe in Jesus & throught him all things are possible. God is able to transform hearts.
I have left to stay with my parents but i am not giving up until God tells me to.
We will be going to councilling & take it from there.
I wont be going home until i see the transformation
I'm just gonna keepand asking for from God.
I have to trust, he has until Christmas so please keep
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