I think I might be done

[jsimms615]

I've looked all over my area for a church to call home and none really appeal to me. I don't want a traditional church that sings old, boring hymns. But, I don't want the rock band church either. Seems like there is nothing between these. The last church we went to was Wesleyan, the service was almost 2 hours long and we were standing up so long it hurt my back. I have pulled it twice in the past, but nothing recent.

I love listening to well thought out sermons, but most of the messages I have heard here appear to be milk and not solid spiritual food. I feel like giving up looking for a good solid church.

 

[graceandpeace]

I think most folks have "options" in their area for church, though just how many churches are available will of course vary based on the region.

I understand wanting to be engaged in a worship service, but would caution against looking to be "entertained" or to fulfill every conceivable preference. (Not suggesting you're doing either of those things.)

How far are you willing to travel? Within the distance you're willing to go, what are your options? If you could list the options (by denomination not name), maybe we could offer opinions/ideas?

 

[LilLamb219]

Some of those old, boring hymns have the most amazing theology...especially Lutheran hymns since Most of our hymns come straight from scripture, there is no senseless repeating nonstop just to get a good feeling.

 

[jsimms615]

I think most folks have "options" in their area for church, though just how many churches are available will of course vary based on the region.

I understand wanting to be engaged in a worship service, but would caution against looking to be "entertained" or to fulfill every conceivable preference. (Not suggesting you're doing either of those things.)

How far are you willing to travel? Within the distance you're willing to go, what are your options? If you could list the options (by denomination not name), maybe we could offer opinions/ideas?

It might be easier to tell you where I have been so far than to tell you what is left. I live in an area where there is a pretty wild variety. I've been to Wesleyan, Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian churches. I grew up Methodist, but then switched at 18 to Baptist.
I'd like something that had communion more often than once a quarter. Like I said earlier, I'd like a well thought out sermon with some depth to it. I would like a place to serve like in a food pantry or perhaps to volunteer some of my counseling time. I dont want to feel like I've been to a rock concert when I go to church, but I also don't want to be bored to death and the older hymns tend to make me want to take a nap

 

[Receiver]

...
I love listening to well thought out sermons, but most of the messages I have heard here appear to be milk...

Jesus says "meat" is to do the will of the Father, which is to be fully involved with a church that is faithful to what Jesus set up. If that means you have to travel or even move, then that's your calling, your obedience, your overcoming, your joy & your answer from God.

 

[graceandpeace]

It might be easier to tell you where I have been so far than to tell you what is left. I live in an area where there is a pretty wild variety. I've been to Wesleyan, Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian churches. I grew up Methodist, but then switched at 18 to Baptist.
I'd like something that had communion more often than once a quarter. Like I said earlier, I'd like a well thought out sermon with some depth to it. I would like a place to serve like in a food pantry or perhaps to volunteer some of my counseling time. I dont want to feel like I've been to a rock concert when I go to church, but I also don't want to be bored to death and the older hymns tend to make me want to take a nap

Okay.

Given the groups you've listed, it's important to note that there are both Mainline Protestant & Conservative/Evangelical Protestant denominations within these groups.

The Wesleyan church falls into the Conservative Protestant end of the spectrum, while the United Methodist Church is considered to be in the Mainline Protestant category. Both the Wesleyan church & UMC, however, are both tied to Methodism. There are similar groupings for Baptist & Presbyterian churches.

In general, Methodist churches tend to differ theologically from Baptist & Presbyterian churches.

Regarding the actual church service, have you considered looking into a church that makes the Eucharist the central act of worship? For the Roman Catholic Church, the Eastern Orthodox Church, many Lutheran churches, & most Episcopal churches, Communion is offered every Sunday & often on other occasions, too because it is the most important part of the service.

Going on a hunch & considering your previous church history, I think you would be better off trying out a Lutheran or Episcopal church.

I'm better suited to talk about my own church, the Episcopal Church. The Eucharist is the focal point of services. We worship through liturgy, so there is a pattern that you gradually learn the longer you attend. In my particular church, we sing songs exclusively from the church's hymnal (the songs are deep & beautiful - Anglicanism has a very strong musical heritage), but some churches also include contemporary songs (though I doubt it would be in rock band fashion). The Episcopal Church is considered to be Catholic & Reformed/Protestant, & we would identify with the Mainline.

Also, we are in communion with the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, which for Lutheran bodies would be in the Mainline.

I am a former Methodist myself, & switching to the Episcopal Church after much consideration & prayer has been the best decision I've made regarding my church life.

If you find a church, you should be able to serve somewhere when the time is right. Most churches - especially moderate to large congregations - tend to have various ministry opportunities, whether a food pantry, teaching Sunday school, etc.

Good luck.

 

[jsimms615]

Okay.

Given the groups you've listed, it's important to note that there are both Mainline Protestant & Conservative/Evangelical Protestant denominations within these groups.

The Wesleyan church falls into the Conservative Protestant end of the spectrum, while the United Methodist Church is considered to be in the Mainline Protestant category. Both the Wesleyan church & UMC, however, are both tied to Methodism. There are similar groupings for Baptist & Presbyterian churches.

In general, Methodist churches tend to differ theologically from Baptist & Presbyterian churches.

Regarding the actual church service, have you considered looking into a church that makes the Eucharist the central act of worship? For the Roman Catholic Church, the Eastern Orthodox Church, many Lutheran churches, & most Episcopal churches, Communion is offered every Sunday & often on other occasions, too because it is the most important part of the service.

Going on a hunch & considering your previous church history, I think you would be better off trying out a Lutheran or Episcopal church.

I'm better suited to talk about my own church, the Episcopal Church. The Eucharist is the focal point of services. We worship through liturgy, so there is a pattern that you gradually learn the longer you attend. In my particular church, we sing songs exclusively from the church's hymnal (the songs are deep & beautiful - Anglicanism has a very strong musical heritage), but some churches also include contemporary songs (though I doubt it would be in rock band fashion). The Episcopal Church is considered to be Catholic & Reformed/Protestant, & we would identify with the Mainline.

Also, we are in communion with the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, which for Lutheran bodies would be in the Mainline.

I am a former Methodist myself, & switching to the Episcopal Church after much consideration & prayer has been the best decision I've made regarding my church life.

If you find a church, you should be able to serve somewhere when the time is right. Most churches - especially moderate to large congregations - tend to have various ministry opportunities, whether a food pantry, teaching Sunday school, etc.

Good luck.

thanks for the input. I don't think I would be comfortable in a episcopal church. Like I said, I don't want to sing old, traditional hymns. The church I grew up in was like that and I never really enjoyed it.

 

[Albion]

It might be easier to tell you where I have been so far than to tell you what is left. I live in an area where there is a pretty wild variety. I've been to Wesleyan, Methodist, Baptist, Presbyterian churches. I grew up Methodist, but then switched at 18 to Baptist.
I'd like something that had communion more often than once a quarter. Like I said earlier, I'd like a well thought out sermon with some depth to it. I would like a place to serve like in a food pantry or perhaps to volunteer some of my counseling time. I dont want to feel like I've been to a rock concert when I go to church, but I also don't want to be bored to death and the older hymns tend to make me want to take a nap

I'm not going to say "Try mine. I like it." That's not what this forum is here to accomplish. But on the other hand, the list of churches you've tried is quite slim, so unless you live in a very small town, I find it hard to believe that no church within driving distance meets the objectives you've laid out for us--which are not particularly unusual or difficult to find most of the time. Communion offered more frequently than once a quarter should not be tough to find, for example.

Now here's the hard part...I can think of denominations that would seem to meet your needs, but I don't know whether they are present in your community. And there's no telling--from our end of things here--which of them might operate a food panty or some similar charity. That is usually a function of the size of the congregation.

 

[Connect]

Hello jsimms
I guess I'd have to ask what you are looking for in "singing"? Is it worship, to express your joy, praise, celebration, preparing yourself to be with God, to Remember of who God is, to be entertained other?

 

[jsimms615]

Hello jsimms
I guess I'd have to ask what you are looking for in "singing"? Is it worship, to express your joy, praise, celebration, preparing yourself to be with God, to Remember of who God is, to be entertained other?

Something that I feel truly expresses gratitude, but also does it in a respectful way. So many times, I don't feel the presence of God. It feels like a service made by man and man centered. I would like something more.

 

[jsimms615]

I'm not going to say "Try mine. I like it." That's not what this forum is here to accomplish. But on the other hand, the list of churches you've tried is quite slim, so unless you live in a very small town, I find it hard to believe that no church within driving distance meets the objectives you've laid out for us--which are not particularly unusual or difficult to find most of the time. Communion offered more frequently than once a quarter should not be tough to find, for example.

Now here's the hard part...I can think of denominations that would seem to meet your needs, but I don't know whether they are present in your community. And there's no telling--from our end of things here--which of them might operate a food panty or some similar charity. That is usually a function of the size of the congregation.

I am in an area where three large towns come together, so probably every major denomination is fairly close by. Though it seems groups like the Nazarenes have a smaller presence. Lots of Quakers in our area.
Because I have been both a chaplain in a hospital, I have been exposed to many faiths over the years. I wouldn't be open to a charismatic church or Catholic.

 

[Albion]

I am in an area where three large towns come together, so probably every major denomination is fairly close by. Though it seems groups like the Nazarenes have a smaller presence. Lots of Quakers in our area.
Because I have been both a chaplain in a hospital, I have been exposed to many faiths over the years. I wouldn't be open to a charismatic church or Catholic.

Understood.

Of course, it's nearly impossible to predict which church, on the basis of denomination, will have the talented preachers and which are weak in that department. Still, I'd say that there should be many possibilities.

The Evangelical Covenant Church, Free Methodist Church, one of the United Methodist congregations you haven't visited yet, the Disciples of Christ, and the Church of God [Anderson, IN] come to mind as ones I'd think might work out. The Disciples have communion weekly, you know, although that's not a liturgical church. The Lutherans are known for meaningful sermons, and I've found them to live up to that reputation most of the time, but I don't know how their style of worship and hymn selections would strike you.

Anyway, I hope you don't give up just yet.

 

[graceandpeace]

thanks for the input. I don't think I would be comfortable in a episcopal church. Like I said, I don't want to sing old, traditional hymns. The church I grew up in was like that and I never really enjoyed it.

&

Something that I feel truly expresses gratitude, but also does it in a respectful way. So many times, I don't feel the presence of God. It feels like a service made by man and man centered. I would like something more.

A few things:

1) I think the number of the types of churches you've visited is relatively quite small. Unless you're willing to expand & consider other choices without pre-judging them, then you're limited by the local options of the Wesleyan/Baptist/etc you've already expressed displeasure with.

2) I would caution against judging that a church is boring because the music didn't induce certain "feelings" about God. What we pray, we believe - & what we sing, too - no matter what we feel.

Keep seeking, do research on the faith if needed (I.e history, tradition, etc) to help narrow your choices, etc.

Good luck.

 

[jsimms615]

Understood.

Of course, it's nearly impossible to predict which church, on the basis of denomination, will have the talented preachers and which are weak in that department. Still, I'd say that there should be many possibilities.

The Evangelical Covenant Church, Free Methodist Church, one of the United Methodist congregations you haven't visited yet, the Disciples of Christ, and the Church of God [Anderson, IN] come to mind as ones I'd think might work out. The Disciples have communion weekly, you know, although that's not a liturgical church. The Lutherans are known for meaningful sermons, and I've found them to live up to that reputation most of the time, but I don't know how their style of worship and hymn selections would strike you.

Anyway, I hope you don't give up just yet.

sadly, most of the Methodist churches I have been in the area seem to have mainly older adults in the congregation and have completely missed the younger generation. It makes me feel concerned for them that they won't be able to stay open in about 5-10 years.
The last one I was at was clearly having financial problems, which was mentioned in the service and they were quite open about it.

 

[Albion]

sadly, most of the Methodist churches I have been in the area seem to have mainly older adults in the congregation and have completely missed the younger generation. It makes me feel concerned for them that they won't be able to stay open in about 5-10 years.
The last one I was at was clearly having financial problems, which was mentioned in the service and they were quite open about it.

OK, but you said you were looking for a church with good preaching, fairly frequent communion, and hymns that are not of the old and boring kind OR of the rock bank type either. Such things I can appreciate as having a bearing upon your worship experience.

To that has now been added having to stand too long, the age of the other congregants, and the possible financial condition of the church a decade from now (!?).

Is there more we should know about?

 

[Galilee63]

Would not a Salvation Army Church be suitable to your needs given your Chaplaincy background JS?

The Salvation Army have been wonderful to me over the years through work.

Have you been Baptized in The Holy Spirit as an Infant, Child or Adult and have you received Jesus' Blessed Holy Sacraments of Love in order to receive God's Blessings, Gifts and Graces in His Holy Will through His Holy Eucharist? This way, God is able to guide you a great deal easier, particularly if you have turned to Jesus in complete trust.

Jesus/God/The Holy Spirit are within all of our hearts once we have received Jesus Christ our Saviour into our hearts through praying to Him from our hearts in complete trust.

That is my suggestion to you first and foremost to receive Jesus/God's Loving Holy response, leading you to His Church

Consecrating your Heart soul mind and body to Jesus Christ our Saviour's Sacred Heart and to our Blessed Virgin Mary Mother of God's Immaculate Heart assists greatly in receiving Jesus/God's Loving Holy response.

I will include you in my prayers.

Love and kindest wishes your Sister in Jesus Christ our Saviour

 

[jsimms615]

OK, but you said you were looking for a church with good preaching, fairly frequent communion, and hymns that are not of the old and boring kind OR of the rock bank type either. Such things I can appreciate as having a bearing upon your worship experience.

To that has now been added having to stand too long, the age of the other congregants, and the possible financial condition of the church a decade from now (!?).

Is there more we should know about?

I mention the age of the congregation because I have 2 teenagers at home. The financial situation of the church is significant because from what I have experienced when congregations start having money problems they start turning on each other and becoming more divisive and I don't want any part of that.
Certainly there is more to the story than that. I have worked in the church before and seen what happens internally and it has made me more skeptical about people's intentions. You see the way that people in church leadership treat other people and you realize that in many churches the church is run like a business without consideration for what Christ wants. For me, it has made me overall less willing to be a part of a church family

 

[Albion]

I mention the age of the congregation because I have 2 teenagers at home. The financial situation of the church is significant because from what I have experienced when congregations start having money problems they start turning on each other and becoming more divisive and I don't want any part of that.
Certainly there is more to the story than that. I have worked in the church before and seen what happens internally and it has made me more skeptical about people's intentions. You see the way that people in church leadership treat other people and you realize that in many churches the church is run like a business without consideration for what Christ wants. For me, it has made me overall less willing to be a part of a church family

Yes, I can appreciate that, but on the other hand, congregations are made up of people . They exhibit many of the failings and struggles that any association made up of men and women have. All things being equal (if they truly are equal), I'd say you should look with some caution at those churches if you're looking for one to join; but I also know that some of the most meaningful and satisfying church experiences I've ever had were with some struggling congregation that all the big churches in town never paid any attention to.

 

[Galilee63]

Those things do not occur within the Catholic Church of which is partially funded by the Catholic Church and long well established ie the majority of Parishes in cities, large towns and country areas with a fair population.

Most people do not contribute when the plate is handed around and no-one is interested if people contribute (or not). Jesus/God/The Holy Spirit have always greatly Blessed the Catholic Church financially with thousands of Catholic Charities and Catholic Missionaries around the world serving people living in poverty including the religious.

I suggest giving either the Salvation Army Churches a go, or the Catholic or Anglican Church where you do not need to contribute at all JS.

Love and kindest wishes your Sister in Jesus Christ our Saviour

 

[Albion]

Those things do not occur within the Catholic Church of which is partially funded by the Catholic Church and long well established ie the majority of Parishes in cities, large towns and country areas with a fair population.

I suggest giving either the Salvation Army Churches a go, or the Catholic or Anglican Church where you do not need to contribute at all JS.

He said he is NOT considering the Catholic Church and probably not the Episcopal church either. As for the Salvation Army, he's looking for more frequent communion--and the Salvation Army does not observe/celebrate Holy Communion at all.