I have been struggling with sexual temptation off and on for the past year and, to be honest, I think I just got my girlfriend pregnant. She's two weeks late, and we plan on getting a pregnancy test this Friday if this continues. I have no idea what to do. I'm so ashamed that I let this happen. I'm supposed to me a leader in the relationship, yet I decided to give into my temptations. I can't sleep at night thinking about how I'm going to tell my friends and family about this. I literally haven't told anyone yet. It's just been bottling up inside me. I know what the Bible says about pre-marital sex and I feel so horrible and guilty about this whole situation. I really messed up.
Joel
Hey Joel,
I noticed your post in Christian Advice, surprised to see it here too. About the "I
really messed up." part, welcome to the human race. lol I made some bad ones myself, thank God his grace is greater than my blunders. I want to talk to you about character for a moment. I believe its a good lesson to help you look at this situation with different perspective.
Lets talk about character
Life is not fair many times and it throws you a curve ball. Reality is that this is ultimately a defining moment in your life. It will be a moment that you will look back on and either regret or a moment of pride and grace. A moment when you were faced with consequences and very tough decisions, a moment of character.
When a person's back is against the wall, that's when their true character is exposed. Weaknesses and strength. Who you really are on the inside.
Let me share with you a moment.
When I first was saved, I desperately wanted someone special in my life. Lord had to sit me down, and talk to me about it. He asked 'what would happen if I did give that special woman for you?.'
First thing came to my mind become a husband and ultimately a father. The Lord told me, what does my Word(bible) say about being a husband and a father. I did a bible study on the subject. I learned that a husband was a leader, or high priest of the household, and I was to love my wife as I love myself.
Two big red flags popped up, I was a follower and I wanted nothing to do with being a leader. Second flag was I didn't even love myself, if I don't love myself, how can I truly love my wife?
Lord used this exercise to help me realize I wasn't ready for what he was planning to give me. I had flaws in my character that prevent me from being able to handle what I was asking for. From that point on, I chose to allow the Lord to help me heal from past hurts, and learn from my sins. As I became stronger and learned more about God's Word, I found myself helping others who were struggling.
The Lord wanted to help me with my character before he blessed me, and that he did. I am happily married of 6 years now.
How character applies to you
Right now your situation is different, but the same problem. Your character is being tested right now, and it is going to be hard. Jesus knew this was coming LONG before you met your girlfriend. Jesus KNEW of your struggles even before you were saved by his grace. What you are going through right now is not news to God. People going be angry, absolutely. Is this the end of your life? Not by a long shot.
Let Jesus be strong for you
I couldn't become the man I am now without Jesus, and you need him now more than ever. Come to him and ask for forgiveness. Once forgiven, ask for guidance and strength. Let this become an opportunity for you to draw closer to God through this than to allow shame keep you from allowing him to help you.
2 Corinthians 12:9 (ESV)
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you,
for my power is made perfect in weakness.” ...
10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities.
For when I am weak, then I am strong.
