I need help

[joshua41]

I became a christian a year and ahalf ago and right before I publicly confused christ as my savior I was reading the blasphemy verse in Mathew. I had all these bad thoughts enter my mind and I don't know- I just had to test the verse. I didn't say anything really bad and I really didn't mean it! But the fact is I said something that I regret.
I spent hours and hours researching the internet and was unable to convince myself that I hadn't committed the unpardonable sin. However, I am convinced that God is stil working in my life. When I ask and truly believe he does answer my prayers. I truly believe he is watching over me but sometimes I have overwhelming doubts about my salvation. It was so bad last night that over and over again in my mind I was thinking "im going tohell " "im going tohell" then I realized I was actually speaking it!!! Is this the same as committing apostacy? I know and believe in the holy trinity - it's just that I'm realy worried I've gone to far. I feel that I've gone to far-or maybe i've convinced myself of this.

Another problem I have is that it seems I love myself more than God. Whenever something goes wrong I through a self pity party and get really depressed. I get depressed so easily and often it's incredible, and instead of looking through God's word for answers I criticize myself. But I realize to be a better Christian God needs to be the center of my world-not myself.


Please pray for me that I might find solice in God's word through The holy spirit and Jesus. Can someone suggest some Bible verses for me to read and pray for me?


forgive me for my awfu l english but im really tired because im onyl 18 and work 10 hours a day and have more responsibily that I can handle

 

[OptimisticSmile]

We are told that nothing can seperate us from the love of God

Christ paid for our sins past present and future. if Christ forgave you and entered your life then he did so knowing that in the future you would have commited whatever sin you have comited. its been forgiven and taken as far as the east is from the west and God has forgotten it. The word says that it is for freedom that we have been set free.

anytime we take our eyes off christ and focus on ourselves we are losing sight of that freedom. I have done this and am still trying to get back on track with simply taking God at his word and trusting him.

the word also tells us that he who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it.

sorry i dont have the references for you as my bible is in the other room. ive been there recently and you just have to keep your eyes he who is perfect and not place them on yoursef. God demands perfection and we are not perfect on our own but in trusting christ we put our faith in he who is perfect and has lived up to the standard God requires.

his word says a broken and contrite heart he will not despise. the fact that this bothers you is a good sign. if you had coitted that sin or hardenned your heart to God you would care less about any of this.

lastly
the word says there is no temptation except that which is common to man. whatever sin has led you here you are not alone in. God knew about it before you were even born yet despite that he chose to forgive you.

meditate on these verses throught the day
"a broken and contrite heart God will not despise"
"It is for freedom that you have been set free"
"Nothing can separate us from the love of God"
"There is no temptation except that which is common to man"

If you arent involved in a bible study with guys or a local church id suggest finidng one the christian life is never ment to be lived alone.

 

[marcb]

Hi,

I spent hours and hours researching the internet and was unable to convince myself that I hadn't committed the unpardonable sin.

Stop looking and just trust that you belong to the Lord. I spent days looking at this and only worsened my problem.

However, I am convinced that God is still working in my life. When I ask and truly believe he does answer my prayers. I truly believe he is watching over me but sometimes I have overwhelming doubts about my salvation. It was so bad last night that over and over again in my mind I was thinking "im going tohell " "im going tohell" then I realized I was actually speaking it!!! Is this the same as committing apostacy?

No, you are not committing apostacy. You are seeking the LORD.

I know and believe in the holy trinity - it's just that I'm realy worried I've gone to far.

I feel that I've gone to far-or maybe i've convinced myself of this.

This is something you have been convinced of. Our emotions are not always accurrate.

Another problem I have is that it seems I love myself more than God. Whenever something goes wrong I through a self pity party and get really depressed. I get depressed so easily and often it's incredible, and instead of looking through God's word for answers I criticize myself. But I realize to be a better Christian God needs to be the center of my world-not myself.

This is the human condition. We are self-centered by nature. You wanting to put God in the center of your life shows that the Spirit is working within you. This is not something we can do or even desire on our own.

Please pray for me that I might find solice in God's word through The holy spirit and Jesus. Can someone suggest some Bible verses for me to read and pray for me?

Ephesians has been helpful to me, especially Chapters 1 & 2. Psalms 13 and 103 as well.

Praying for you. Marc

 

[Jayangel81]

I pray that you overcome this, many of us have experianced the very same thing, a while back i was reading things on the internet about sins and these lies came into my mind that i blasphemed the holy spirit.

Dont give into the lies of our enemy, he likes to play tricks on us. Just remember God knows us better than we do, put trust in him!

I will pray for you!

in Christ,
James

 

[jc9992]

hey Josh your symptoms and struggles sound very close to what i experienced myself.

pm me any time.

 

[jewellj]

Hi,im pretty new on here too but I want to write this to the one who wrote the thread sorry but i've forgotten ur name??I'm bad with names. Don't listen to that crap about u blasphemying the Holy Spirit cause u are saved and don't let the evil enemy give u a inch of pain.The ole hell hound put me thru 20 years of worrying thinking crying,almost suicide(by thinking i've done it now so what's there to live for..LIE) U haven't rejected the Holy Spirit's call to Christ,u recieved Christ and that sin is already gone,can't happen to U a pastor informed me so stop right now cause it can take U down a long road of pain and suffering.I have Relgious OCd and have been suffering for years but U haven't done that precious child. Let that one go. Like in romans it came to me the verse everybody knows."Therefore there is NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus",So good None for U ur free and forgiven,Please don't worry for me,cause I've worried too many years. "I'm free from condemnation"Romans 8:1,2,,,,,,,,"I'm confident that the good work God has begun in me will be perfected" Philippians 3:20,,,,,,,,,"I may approach God with freedom and confidence" Ephesians 2:10,,,,,,,,"I've been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins." Colossians 1:14
I'm taking these out of the book Restored by Neil Anderson. Once U belong to Christ,He doesn't leave U,U a member of a royal family,He don't indian give,remember that.Please listen to me so u won't suffer for NO reason that's unnecessary. This was a trap the enemy hit me with after I was a Christian....it's a lie a Christian can't do this sin I've been affirmed.God bless U and I hope this helps U."If God be for U who can be against U" Praise God.

 

[jewellj]

Hi,im pretty new on here too but I want to write this to the one who wrote the thread sorry but i've forgotten ur name??I'm bad with names. Don't listen to that crap about u blasphemying the Holy Spirit cause u are saved and don't let the evil enemy give u a inch of pain.The ole hell hound put me thru 20 years of worrying thinking crying,almost suicide(by thinking i've done it now so what's there to live for..LIE) U haven't rejected the Holy Spirit's call to Christ,u recieved Christ and that sin is already gone,can't happen to U a pastor informed me so stop right now cause it can take U down a long road of pain and suffering.I have Relgious OCd and have been suffering for years but U haven't done that precious child. Let that one go. Like in romans it came to me the verse everybody knows."Therefore there is NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus",So good None for U ur free and forgiven,Please don't worry for me,cause I've worried too many years. "I'm free from condemnation"Romans 8:1,2,,,,,,,,"I'm confident that the good work God has begun in me will be perfected" Philippians 3:20,,,,,,,,,"I may approach God with freedom and confidence" Ephesians 2:10,,,,,,,,"I've been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins." Colossians 1:14
I'm taking these out of the book Restored by Neil Anderson. Once U belong to Christ,He doesn't leave U,U a member of a royal family,He don't indian give,remember that.Please listen to me so u won't suffer for NO reason that's unnecessary. This was a trap the enemy hit me with after I was a Christian....it's a lie a Christian can't do this sin I've been affirmed.God bless U and I hope this helps U."If God be for U who can be against U" Praise God.

 

[joshua41]

I thank everyone for their prayers and support, it really does go along way.
I'm convinced God is still working with me, for he relieved me of many stresses today.

 

[OptimisticSmile]

good. ive been where you are and I stopped praying and everything. its hard to see God answer prayer if you stop praying. answered prayer leads to assurence. keep praying even if you dont feel like it or dont feel he's listening.

God says "you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. It could be that at times God strips everything away from us even our assurence of him so that we are left with that broken and contrite heart and a descision to seek him with it. He has promised to never leave us or forsake us. if we feel he has left us then we have taken our eyes off of who he is Omnipresent and that he is living in us. He has sealed us with his spirit unto the day of redemption. WE ARE SEALED!!! when Christ said "It is finished" it really was finished. Keep in mind salvation does not depend on us except for choosing to beleive and accept him. You were saved when you heard his voice and responded to it. The sheep hear my voice and follow me he says and so if you heard his voice and followed you are saved. Im preaching to myself with all this. it seems like a leap of faith to take God at his word and trust that he has saved us when we convince ourselves we are not but that is what faith and trust are about.

 

[joshua41]

I always get scared when I read

36But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. 37For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned."

Because I said an idle word ...is he saying that I will have to explain why I said it or I wil be condemned for my idle words?

 

[jc9992]

what exactly did you say?we need to know.

i have an idea of what you "might" have said.which i know is forgivable.

what did u say?

 

[joshua41]

sucks

it wasn't in malice or ill contempt.

 

[joshua41]

the devil tries to convince me in my mind that im condemned for this and tries to get me to say that I reject everything- but I don't. I know ther eis a god.

 

[whitebeaches]

I need to look up some scriptures and if I find what I am looking for I will come back and post them so you are able to see them yourself. The bible does tell us that when we ask God for forgiveness that sin is remembered no more. He does not keep a record of our forgiven sins. I remember my pastor telling me that there will be two judgements. One will be for those who totally reject Jesus as the personal Lord and savior and the other for those who are saved. Ours is totally different from the other in that we are to have crowns that we lay at his feet and their judegement will be to be cast in the lake of fire with satan.
My pastor also said he believed the unpardonable sin is total rejection of Jesus Christ.Not believing and excepting his free gift of salvation. Also, he showed us a verse in the NT that says grieve not the holy spirt because you are sealed unto the day of redemption and that no man can pluck you out of the hand of God. And that means us too.
I know when I was younger I was afraid of things being said and that I read too but as you read you will start to see things revealed to you that you didnt know before and when you read and reread even more will come to light. Praying God guides you to some encouraging scriptures that will lead you to the road of happiness.
hugs

 

[OptimisticSmile]

I think that verse is talking about who we confess as our savior. If you confess with your mouth and know in your heart that God has raised christ from the dead you shall be saved.

for the christian at judment we will be recognized for professing Christ while non-believers will be judged for having professed other things like self, money, false gods.

I remember a verse as an adolescent that said something about calling somoene a fool and I worried that I was not forgiven because I had said some hurtfull things to someone.

its like if there is a warning in the bible about doing something we automatically think what if or look at things out of context and condem ourselves and pretty soon we see ourselves as pharasees or what not.

for me it was going through a time of doubt and reading where Christ was telling somoene he had no faith. That really made me feel bad. Of course i flipped there at random and its best to study the scriptures diligently. if i were to accept that Christ was saying I had no faith then id have to also accept what I randomly flipped to the day before while praying which was a passage a pasage about assurence of salvation .

 

[gracealone]

the devil tries to convince me in my mind that im condemned for this and tries to get me to say that I reject everything- but I don't. I know ther eis a god.

Hey Josh,
Besides the Devil being pleased when we suffer with these OCD thoughts, or any other illness for that matter, you have to accept that the chemistry in your brain is the real culprit creating so much anxiety that even one intrusive unwanted thought such as you described is going to make you miserable.
Have you noticed that no matter how much knowledge you have scripturally to oppose these thoughts that they are still there? Have you noticed that the more you try to get reassurance that they just aren't true, the more time you spend debating them, fighting them.... and working so very hard to prove them wrong to yourself over and over and over again that they are still there?
This is the nature of OCD. We tend as Christians to have such a hard time not making our OCD a spiritual problem.
Your brain wants something to chew on to satisfy it's hyped up fight or flight condition. So it will take any one of these intrusive unwanted thoughts and leach onto it. Then the intense feelings of anxiety that the thought causes will cause you to feel that there must be some sort of validness to the thought. So you begin the endless battle of trying to rid yourself of the thought. But when we OCD'ers do that.. have you noticed... the anxiety gets worse, the thought becomes larger and more significant than before and we are trapped in the endless cycle of obsessing, fighting the thoughts, feeling tremdous anxiety, obsessing, fighting the thoughts... feeling growing anxiety, obsessing even more... on and on and on we go. Until we say... "So What!!" and just let the thoughts be there without giving into their demands for attention.
Learn all you can about exposure/response, because as you've probably discovered. All the reassurance in the world does not make the thoughts go away... because you have OCD.
Sorry for going on again about this... but we have to deal with the disorder properly in order to begin down the right path to recovery.
God Bless.. praying for you.
Mitzi

 

[j3nny7]

what exactly did you say?we need to know.

i have an idea of what you "might" have said.which i know is forgivable.

what did u say?

well i can tell you one thing you are safe.. I mean god answers your prayers... i can't even pray anymore I'm so paranoid i hope i havn't commit the unpardonable I can't sleep!!

 

[alex872]

Here are a few verses that come to my mind (1 Timothy 1, NIV):

12 I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service.
13 Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief.
14 The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.

Paul said he was "once a blasphemer", but still appointed to His service.

My pastor also said he believed the unpardonable sin is total rejection of Jesus Christ.

Yes, I've also heard about that. Christians seem to agree on this.

I've had thoughts that blaspheme God for months, if not years. God knows I have these thoughts but God also knows how much I hate them.

I've prayed for you, Joshua.

 

[Lisa0315]

I became a christian a year and ahalf ago and right before I publicly confused christ as my savior I was reading the blasphemy verse in Mathew. I had all these bad thoughts enter my mind and I don't know- I just had to test the verse. I didn't say anything really bad and I really didn't mean it! But the fact is I said something that I regret.
I spent hours and hours researching the internet and was unable to convince myself that I hadn't committed the unpardonable sin. However, I am convinced that God is stil working in my life. When I ask and truly believe he does answer my prayers. I truly believe he is watching over me but sometimes I have overwhelming doubts about my salvation. It was so bad last night that over and over again in my mind I was thinking "im going tohell " "im going tohell" then I realized I was actually speaking it!!! Is this the same as committing apostacy? I know and believe in the holy trinity - it's just that I'm realy worried I've gone to far. I feel that I've gone to far-or maybe i've convinced myself of this.

Another problem I have is that it seems I love myself more than God. Whenever something goes wrong I through a self pity party and get really depressed. I get depressed so easily and often it's incredible, and instead of looking through God's word for answers I criticize myself. But I realize to be a better Christian God needs to be the center of my world-not myself.


Please pray for me that I might find solice in God's word through The holy spirit and Jesus. Can someone suggest some Bible verses for me to read and pray for me?


forgive me for my awfu l english but im really tired because im onyl 18 and work 10 hours a day and have more responsibily that I can handle

I daresay that many Christians have "blasphemed" prior to their conversion. I know that I did. However, the only sin that cannot be forgiven is rejecting Jesus Christ.

If God were not in you, you would not be so troubled over this. If God is in you, then, you have not committed an unpardonable sin.

Satan is magnifying this thing inside of you. Here is a verse that has helped me in the past, and I pray that it will help you also.

James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Many times, I tried to resist the devil and failed. Then, I came across this verse. The only way to make the devil flee is to submit yourself to God. Our simple resistance has no power, but calling on the name of the Lord, and laying our burdens at the foot of the cross will do it! Satan will have to walk through the blood to get to you. He will not do that.

Lisa

 

[joshua41]

Thanks for all the thought and prayer now...I'm not nearly as worried about it as I was.