i need help taming my evil tongue

[BYHISLOVE]

No matter how hard i try to curb my foul language i still swear much, much to often. i pray and talk about it with my wife and fellow christians but five minutes later there i am doing it again. is it really that important in the long run? i mean its not like i do it in public (church, the store etc.) but at home watching the news etc yes? please anything that anyone can tell me that might stick would help greatly.

 

[manitouscott]

I have three suggestions:

1) Make a deal with your wife and your Christian buddies: every time you swear you have to give them a dollar, and if you don't have a dollar you have to sing "Mary had a little lamb" in front of them. Yes, I'm serious.

2) Read the Bible OUT LOUD at home. Speaking out loud for extended periods of time without swearing may train your brain not to insert the expletives so often.

3) For awhile, fast from things that bring the filthy language out, like the news etc. Avoid the situations where you cuss the worst.

How wonderful it is when the Holy Spirit convicts us of something and we respond. How wonderful, and sometimes difficult. But we have a power to help us that we never had until we became believers! Amen!

I am praying for you!

 

[disciple1938]

I understand and am very empathic with you in this matter. I shared the same problem of not being able to control my tongue; as James notes it is an unruly member which NO MAN CAN CONTROL. But I discovered that God gave us an answer and that answer is great. It is to praise god 24/7. As often as possible actually praise him, and try to maintain the attitude of praise in your mind at all times. The thing is that if you keep your tongue and your mind busy praising it becomes impossible to curse or use foul language or to gossip or condemn or any of those negative things. Bad language and speaking evil is a habit. Like any habit it is hard to break. But the best way to overcome a habit is to replace it with another habit. This has really worked for me and I hope it will also help you. I stumbled on to this when I asked God wehy he needed our praise and he told me in my spirit: "I gave you the gift of praise to keep you from sinning." God bless you and I will pray for you in this matter. God loves you and so do I.

 

[LaidBack78]

I agree with the poster above me. Praise the lord every chance you get. On your way to work, just thank him for everthing he has done for you. On your way to the store, before you eat, before you sleep, before you wake up, anytime you are alone, you get the picture. Praise him, thank him, glorify him at all times and watch how he will change your life. Just try it for a week and see what happens.

 

[Spunkn]

Why is it important to you to use foul language?

I used to cuss fairly frequently, but it was because I was around non-Christians quite a bit, and it felt like I was "fitting" in better.

The more you are around other people who cuss, TV shows that cuss all the time, the more you will want to do it. Cut off influences that feed into your habit of cussing. If you're watching things that make you angry (politics, news, whatever) and that makes you cuss, then stop watching those programs. Or if you -really- are dedicated to stopping. Every time you cuss, do 15 push-ups.

Matthew 15:18 But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.

Words are powerful. Do you need to feel the cuss because you're angry? Because it makes you feel more like a man? That would have been the reason I did it before mostly. Because "men" cuss. It's what we do. Yeah, no. That's just what you're taught by culture. And it's a really bad habit.

Colossians 3:8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.

Proverbs 13:3 Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips
comes to ruin.

James 1:26 If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless.

Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.

Proverbs 15:4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.

Proverbs 15:2 The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.

Not all of these deal with cussing directly, but God seems to think what we say, and how we say things are important.

You may not be cussing around anyone else, but God is still there. When you cuss, is it really something God would approve of?

Cuss words are mainly used because they are considered offensive. So -most- of the time when someone cusses they are deliberately using it to be more offensive (under the guise of, it's just a more powerful sounding word).

Just my opinion though

 

[1watchman]

Habits are hard to break, but if one realizes they are offending the Lord Jesus and His Father, that may help (providing one is a real "born again" believer by the Holy Spirit ---otherwise just religion will not make a difference). We all need to put the Lord Jesus first in our life, and it will make a real difference in our ways, for salvation and blessings.

 

[Peripatetic]

We all have bad habits that are harder to break than others - it's part of our humanity, and it definitely varies from person-to-person. That's why I cringe when people imply that controlling a certain behavior should be easy because it is for them.

Refraining from swearing has always been easy for me, but I know it's not the case for others - especially those for whom it is a part of the culture in their family or workplace.

While I don't think we should be legalistic about it, foul language does affect other people, sometimes in ways that we don't know. I guess I just figured there's no upside to it.

I don't have a foolproof idea for controlling it (though I did get a kick out of the "Mary had a little lamb" idea from an earlier post... ). But I will say this: try to find other ways of releasing tension. Exercise is especially good in this area. Swearing in anger can be a sign of pent-up emotions that should be released in healthy ways.

 

[motherprayer]

No matter how hard i try to curb my foul language i still swear much, much to often. i pray and talk about it with my wife and fellow christians but five minutes later there i am doing it again. is it really that important in the long run? i mean its not like i do it in public (church, the store etc.) but at home watching the news etc yes? please anything that anyone can tell me that might stick would help greatly.

One thing I did, actually before becoming a Christian, because my daughter was repeating my curses (yikes!) was to replace the words I was using with similiar words. It took awhile, but it worked. For example:

Instead of saying GD-it, I would say, "God help us!"
Instead of saying the S-word, I would say "Ishkabibble!" (Which helped much to lessen the stress of the situation, just by the way it sounded. Try it, I guarantee a smile)
Instead of saying the F-word, I would say "Fudge!"

I can't think of others, but there are many. Eventually, by changing the meaning of the words, I realized how unnecessary the usage of them really is.

A word from my father, but I warn you it comes of a bit harsh, as he was a harsh man. But it is quite truthful, and carries a lot of meaning. He would say, when I was growing up and started to curse, "The more a person uses curse words in their general conversation, the less intelligent they sound." That made a huge impact on me.

I'm praying for you! I still have trouble with my mouth. We can pray together!

 

[Emmy]

Dear ByHisLove. Ask the Lord Jesus to help you tame your tongue.
( Matthew 7: 7-8) Keep asking Jesus, again and again. Jesus our Saviour will help you overcome that wilful tongue. I say this with love. Greetings from Emmy, your sister in Christ.

 

[parsley]

I think it's more important to guard negativity that comes out of your mouth, than the specific words. Consider whether you are destroying others with your words, always pulling people down, or building others up in the Lord.

A word is a symbol that is understood in your culture. People know what you mean by what you say. But the word itself is just a combination of sounds, and could be interpreted differently in a different culture.

Say what you mean, mean what you say. Instead of slapping your hand for saying swear words, start focusing on what you really want to communicate to others.

Let the love of God come through you, to transform others' lives.