I have a question in which i am very conserned. Me and a guy i am seeing have been fooling around alot latley sexually and we were thinking about taking it to the next step. but we both belive that sex before marriage is wrong. and we both would rather not go to hell. we were wondering if it would count as premarital sex if he was inside me but didnt come. Hes very courious as to what it feels like. I want to know where pre-marital sex starts and ends. if any of u could reply and answer my question that would be most appreciated.
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i need help please
- Thread starter meachpie
- Start date
I
InTheFlame
Guest
Yes, it is considered sex.
And yes, it can lead to you getting pregnant, too.
What else do you two do together? Do you talk about your lives? Your hopes and dreams? What God has planned for you?
And yes, it can lead to you getting pregnant, too.
What else do you two do together? Do you talk about your lives? Your hopes and dreams? What God has planned for you?
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well i mean we want to become as close as possile physically with out going to hell. and yes we do talk about other things besides sex. we are both enjoy other things although we are both very new to the world of sex and would like to further pursoe it without being condemed to hell. and all i wanna know is would that condem us?
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AceHero
Veteran
No sin is bad enough for God to condemn you to eternal damnation provided that you're a Christian and have made a decision in your life to serve God instead of yourself. With that said, being a Christian does not give us permission to do whatever we want. We can't just aimlessly sin and honestly confess to God. That's not how it works. While Christians sin, we are expected to be more aware of what is right and what is wrong.
I think your problem is that you're treating sex as a purely physical thing, while sex also has emotional and even spiritual aspects that revolve around it, though sex can only be completely experienced in the context of marriage.
Sex in marriage is beautiful: not only does a couple have fun physically, but they also connect on a emotional level, with an overall feeling of togetherness, and become "one flesh," as the Bible puts itsex out of marriage has nothing spiritual to it, as it's a sin, and emotionally, feelings are fuzzy at best. While the sex may have felt good during that one moment, afterwards you may have second thoughts concerning whether doing this at this time was the right thing to do.
All I can tell you is this: from all I've heard, sex in marriage will be a lot less special on your wedding night if you have premarital sex, because it won't be something new. Sex in marriage is a bonding elementit brings a couple closer together. But outside of the context of marriage, it's the opposite: it could pull you and your boyfriend apart and completely ruin your relationship.
I think your problem is that you're treating sex as a purely physical thing, while sex also has emotional and even spiritual aspects that revolve around it, though sex can only be completely experienced in the context of marriage.
Sex in marriage is beautiful: not only does a couple have fun physically, but they also connect on a emotional level, with an overall feeling of togetherness, and become "one flesh," as the Bible puts itsex out of marriage has nothing spiritual to it, as it's a sin, and emotionally, feelings are fuzzy at best. While the sex may have felt good during that one moment, afterwards you may have second thoughts concerning whether doing this at this time was the right thing to do.
All I can tell you is this: from all I've heard, sex in marriage will be a lot less special on your wedding night if you have premarital sex, because it won't be something new. Sex in marriage is a bonding elementit brings a couple closer together. But outside of the context of marriage, it's the opposite: it could pull you and your boyfriend apart and completely ruin your relationship.
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eatenbylocusts
Senior Veteran
Once you've started the physical touching that you're probably talking about, it seems to take over the relationship and keep you from getting to know the other person. If the relationship doesn't lead to marriage there will probably be a lot more pain in the break up and even more if you did have intercourse. Don't give away pieces of yourself. The physical intimacy can cloud your judgment regarding the relationship.
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meachpie, what you say concerns me...
if you're concerned about being condemned to hell, then i don't think you know what it truly means to be a christian...
do you know what it means to have a real relationship with Jesus? do you know what is means to have accepted the Lord into your heart? are you 1000% sure that if you died today, you would go to heaven?
if you answered anything other than "YES!!" to the three questions above, then PLEASE contact me so that i can explain it to you.
if you're concerned about being condemned to hell, then i don't think you know what it truly means to be a christian...
do you know what it means to have a real relationship with Jesus? do you know what is means to have accepted the Lord into your heart? are you 1000% sure that if you died today, you would go to heaven?
if you answered anything other than "YES!!" to the three questions above, then PLEASE contact me so that i can explain it to you.
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peanutbutter12
Senior Veteran
Something else to consider... if you have to ask if it's ok, it probably isn't.
Sex is a pandoras box and once it's opened, you desire it more and more. And I will tell you this, if you are trying sex to just "get as close to each other as you can", then you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. Not only will you run into issues of concern and worry such as pregnancy, but you run into the chance that the relationship will become completely dependant on sex. That's not what you want. Sex (after marriage) is a bonus to the uber awesome relationship you have with your husband or wife.
Premarital sex begins when you are doing things you wouldn't do directly in front of your parents (For all those who say you wouldn't kiss in front of your parents, wait till your wedding day.
) and the fact that you even have to question it is yourself telling you that you're going too far and need to stop.
In the words of the great movie, Robin Hood: Men In Tights
"No ding ding without zee wedding ring!"
CJ
Sex is a pandoras box and once it's opened, you desire it more and more. And I will tell you this, if you are trying sex to just "get as close to each other as you can", then you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. Not only will you run into issues of concern and worry such as pregnancy, but you run into the chance that the relationship will become completely dependant on sex. That's not what you want. Sex (after marriage) is a bonus to the uber awesome relationship you have with your husband or wife.
Premarital sex begins when you are doing things you wouldn't do directly in front of your parents (For all those who say you wouldn't kiss in front of your parents, wait till your wedding day.
) and the fact that you even have to question it is yourself telling you that you're going too far and need to stop.In the words of the great movie, Robin Hood: Men In Tights
"No ding ding without zee wedding ring!"
CJ
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HolyOne87
Call Me A Sinner, Call Me A Saint..
eatenbylocusts said:
I'd have to agree. Sometimes when you do one thing, you get an urge to do more and wanting to do more. I went through this(i really regret it,and i know I will never do it again). My ex and I were really in love(from what i THOUGHT at the time). Let me tell you, I went through A LOT of pain when my ex broke it off with me. I was hurt. I couldnt get over it. I've done stuff with him I wouldnt ordinarily think of doing. He broke it with me because he had no self-control. He ended up cheating on me a couple of times while we were dating. I was in a depression for about 5 months. I really wouldnt want you to do that too. My ex and I now arent even on great talking terms anymore because of all of this. This kind of is an example of what Ace was saying. Stuff like this can break up not only a relationship, but also a strong friendship as well.
As eatenbylocusts said, "Don't give away pieces of yourself". I'd say save it for marriage. It will be more great and more beautiful that way. Plus, you don't want to waste all the greatnesses of marriage now because if you do, like someone else said, it will lose its meaning and become less great.
What I'd say to do is talk things over with your boyfriend. Try and create a promise to yourselves that you will save this stuff until marriage..No matter how hard it might be.
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S
stevezak11
Guest
Even though any form of sex is WRONG before marriage...God will not send you to hell as long as you've given your life to Jesus.
As soon as you start dealing with "how far can we go" and "how much can we do," you are treading on thin ice.
As soon as you start dealing with "how far can we go" and "how much can we do," you are treading on thin ice.
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Don't procreate.
If you have to fool around then fool around. But if you don't want a baby then don't try making one.
Act responsibly. Consider consequences of actions.
if you are going to have sex anyway yet don't want to worry about children then at least invest in some birth control.
I'm not telling you to go out and have sex. But human nature seems to say that you're going to anyway at the rate you're going. So rather than trying to convince yourselves that you're not really having sex, be intelligent about it. Act responsibly.
If you have to fool around then fool around. But if you don't want a baby then don't try making one.
Act responsibly. Consider consequences of actions.
if you are going to have sex anyway yet don't want to worry about children then at least invest in some birth control.
I'm not telling you to go out and have sex. But human nature seems to say that you're going to anyway at the rate you're going. So rather than trying to convince yourselves that you're not really having sex, be intelligent about it. Act responsibly.
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